As Nevr looked up from the ditch he was in, he realised the words that had been repeated to him countless times during his life weren't just meaningless sounds, but sagely advice that could have saved him from this disgraceful existence had he paid attention. Naked but for a loose and muddy pillowcase tied off around his waist and flapping in the playful breeze, Nevr considered praying before deciding he wasn't worthy of the grace of a mindless animal, much less a saviour of any sort.
Crawling through a pool of empty bottles, needles and noodle boxes, Nevr heaved himself up and over the crest of the trench. Tomorrow-week he would have been calling it home for three years. Nevr had amassed a filthy beard, which he used to stash the fecal matter of rodents for use on particularly rainy nights. The nights where the rain seems to blur into tiny droplets of depression, seeping into your soul one millilitre at a time, completely overwhelming any sense of optimism you try vainly clinging to. Were it not for rodent excrement, Nevr was unsure just what would have become of him.
Nevr dragged himself to his feet, looking back to see the carefully-crafted mould of his body amongst the bottles serving a new owner. "Sweet dreams" he whispered gently, more to himself than anyone else. Clenching his fists with determination, Nevr convinced himself that today was the day and everything was about to come up Milhouse.
The trudge to the alleyway entrance seemed shorter than usual. Perhaps this was a sign of acceptance, of life becoming easier. Nevr took out the glass shard that was shaped like a bread roll (his favourite one) out of a small groove in his pillowcase and carved a reminder into his right thigh, followed by a smiley face. Making light of any situation was very important to him, as he believed without his coping mechanisms, he was nothing. Nevr bandaged his wounds with a cheeseburger wrapper and continued the day.
Behind the dumpster that sat just inside the alley was where Nevr kept his banjo. Throughout his time as a member of the residentially-challenged, Nevr got by through the magic of song. His hard times showed on the banjo; there wasn't a square inch that didn't have some kind of dent, tear or eccentric appendage (again, Nevr's favourite being a bread roll shaped unusually like a bread roll jutting outwards from the base). With the one remaining string Nevr had named Ol' Faithful, he began to bless all passer-bys with beautiful melodies and soothing ballads.
However, humans being the fickle creatures they are, are not always open to blessings or soothings. Such was the case of the tiny Asian man casually strolling along the way, six inch Sub in one hand and a roll of sushi in the other. Perhaps it was the lack of range Nevr could perform with a one-stringed banjo or perhaps it was the untuned and slightly irritating twang of the instrument that set him off, but sure enough the almost-midget threw his food in opposite directions (much to the dismay of the ravenous Nevr, who silently made a note to himself to check the condition of the food at the first available opportunity) and began an attention demanding verbal explosion.
Onlookers tried their best to stifle laughter and the traffic in eyesight quickly backed up, some drivers even forgetting to brake in their efforts to absorb as much of the incident as possible. Frantically jumping on the spot, the Asian man seemed to be excreting water from all possible leak points: sweat quickly building on the brow, spit spraying in all directions, steam pouring from the ears. If it weren't for the enraged foreigners complete inability to speak English someone may have started feeling a little concerned for their safety.
Having done it tough for several years now, Nevr unblinkingly looked the man in the eye with a steely nerve. Once it became apparent the outburst was not set to cease anytime soon, Nevr rose to his full height and glared down at the red figure barely level with his navel. Taking care to speak calmly yet assertively, Nevr politely requested the man take his leave and attempt to make the most of the rest of his day. Or at least, that's what he intended to say. More than 1,000 days of destitution had left him with some bad habits and it wasn't until the words had left his mouth that Nevr realised he had just asked the man if he could spare any change. With a look of utter disgust and a slight wobble in his knee, the man of Asia spat on the ground and stormed off.
Despite his communication blunder, Nevr sat content for a short while, enjoying his small meal of well-earned discarded Subway and sushi. A few witnesses of the earlier spectacle had generously donated some coins to his booze fund (adequately advertised as 'Money For A Lawyer Because My Stinking No-Good Ex-Girlfriend Cheated Me Of Everything' on the cardboard of a Coco Pops box), which pleased him to the point of visible grin. It was a rare thing these days, to feel adequate enough to open wide and bear those dirty browns in anything but an incomprehensible religious rant, but homeless is as homeless does.
The day passed and the sun moved on to give room to the moon. Nevr let out a small sigh, there was something mystical about the night that always brought a painful pang of loneliness with it. This night however brought some luck. As if from God a small, thin dog rounded the corner and abruptly sat itself between the countless bags of garbage and Nevr. Extending his hand, Nevr petted the dog gently, whispering to himself "This is quite possibly the best day I've had all week. If only I had more food..."
And again, as if from God himself, a handsome man in a classy suit appeared, walking down the alleyway towards him. Once level, the man squatted, carefully placed down his briefcase and offered his hand, introducing himself. Nevr stared at it, glancing at the mans face and struggling to sit up amidst the incredulous amount of thoughts racing through his head. Most were God-fearing thoughts of hope and excitement, but here and there speckled shameful yet racy thoughts of intimate moments with this rich looking gentleman. It had been so long since Nevr had felt the loving touch of another human being.
Seemingly amused by Nevr's social inadequacies, the suited man bent a little closer and asked if Nevr wanted some money, or some food. Suspicions began to raise as Nevr had sudden and violent flashbacks to fighting fellow homeless for bread rolls and throwing Molotov cocktails into fancy buildings for drugs. Although tears slowly started rolling down the centre of his face, Nevr was in no position to refuse charity of any kind. He nodded and extended his hand to receive the note being held just out of his reach.
For no apparent reason, the classy gentleman rudely pulled the note away and turned sour. "Why don't you get a job?" he inquired. "If you're so hungry, why don't you get a job?"
Tortured and suddenly aware of the minimal protection his pillowcase offered him as it blew hither and tither in an aggressive night draft, Nevr's silent tears progressed to pitiful sobbing accompanied with unpredictable shivering. Barely stringing words together, Nevr informed his interrogator that he had lost his job.
"Why? Were you drinking? Is that why you lost it? Insider trading? Just joking. No, really - were you drinking on the job?"
"I was fired. I was laid off."
Complementing Nevr's increasing verbal and mental frailty, the third member of the gathering, his newly found canine companion, began to release soft, heartstring-pulling whimpers. Nevr was unsure whether the whimpers stemmed from a similar hunger he himself felt or, much worse, whether it sensed something sinister in the air. Before he could analyse it much further, the suited man spoke again.
