I wish she didnt have a crush on me

[psycho-squirrel]

This girl in a few of my college classes has a crush on me. She always tries to sit next to me, I have heard her talking about me and all this stuff.
Some of her friends have told me that I should ask her out, trying to get with her.

She is nice, but having been with a few bad relationships that were nothing but disasters, I decided not to be in any relationship at all any time soon.
I can even see it now. I go out with her, things are nice. We go out more times, start to form a more deeper relationship. Things are good, then they turn south. She tries to tell me to buy this or buy that for her. Complaining that I am not taking her to a fancy restaurant every weekend. Eventually we break up.
That is what I see. That is what I am pretty sure what will happen. Happened the other times I was with someone.

I like her and would like to try dating her, however I just cant let myself even try.

I know people say "Well you sometimes have to let yourself become vulnerable" or all that. However after letting myself be vulnerable, it only caused disaster.

I just wish that she didn't like me. That would make things so much easier.

[O-Phuket]

Sorry man. Are you friends with her? I feel bad that she's trying so hard. And don't be all "But then they turn south" because, duh. Of course not all relationships are perfect. You give up too easy.

[Ghyfty]

Come on man, don't think so hard about it and just date her. She also might be the one. Son't let her get away.

[GodsSentWarrior]

Sounds to me like you don't really take care of your girlfriends. Girls desire to be showered with good dates at expensive restaurants at least once a month, or twice. Women are never happy, thats why you have to continue to make them happy. If you arent willing to pull your weight and be a man and support a woman, don't do it. Anyone who says otherwise has a shitty relationship or doesn't have one. Girls should only be mistreated sexually, not personally. They like being "mistreated" sexually.

TLTR:
Doesnt sound like you want to support a woman right now; so don't.

[Rosenrot-I]

How about you man up and realize that real life is not how you see it in movies where you find the love of your life in college and you live the rest of your life together? Of course you're gonna break up, but so what? Shit happens. And besides, before things turn south as you've said, you'd probably visit her southern-most parts if you know what I mean. Stop being a disgrace to men everywhere.

[psycho-squirrel]

At 11/30/08 04:06 AM, O-Phuket wrote: Sorry man. Are you friends with her? I feel bad that she's trying so hard. And don't be all "But then they turn south" because, duh. Of course not all relationships are perfect. You give up too easy.

Not so much friends, well, maybe. I talk to her sometimes and help with her homework and projects.

It isn't that I give up, I just don't begin. Part of me wants to try and have another relationship, but then I see how that relationship could go and then I decide not to take it. I let myself go down those roads too many times that I simply don't want to do it again.

My last relationship was what made me snap and say no more, because before her I had a bad relationship. So I didn't want to go into any relationship again for a very long time. After a while a friend told me that I need to confront my fear before it eats me away. So after some time I dated this girl I knew, were good for a while, then things went south. She tried to take advantage of me, money wise. Demanded this and that all the time. After dumping her I knew that I couldn't be in another relationship like that again.

I feel like no matter what, the relationship will go bad.

[GoForthAndDie]

You are reading only the worst part of a possibly awesome relationship. Go for it. It might turn out better than you think.

[psycho-squirrel]

I basically just needed to get that off my chest. I am not going to date her what so ever.
I am trying to learn not to care about how people feel. Only causes me pain and what not.

[SoulPiker]

You should tell her that you don't want another relationship.

[subzerov]

Go for it! What do you have to lose? It's well worth the risk!!! ;D take a chance!

[MissingNYC]

you are an utter schmuck.. if a girl likes you, thats it... you say YES

[Ghyfty]

At 11/30/08 06:06 AM, MissingNYC wrote: you are an utter schmuck.. if a girl likes you, thats it... you say YES

Don't you even understand? Read it one more time.

[Backbiter]

All your previous girlfriends seem pretty materialistic if they want you to always take em to fancy restaurants and crap.
I say take a chance with this one, she might actually like you for you lol.

[RubberTrucky]

Go out with her and tell her you will not buy her everything she wants. If she really wants to be with you, she should accept that. Tell her about your experiences and how much you hated those.
Not all girls are out for your money though.

[andhination]

At 11/30/08 04:31 AM, psycho-squirrel wrote: I am trying to learn not to care about how people feel. Only causes me pain and what not.

And not caring how people feel will leave you with no friends, thus you will feel loneliness and pain and what not.
Care about how people feel, but just don't overdo it. I've tried both extremes and they both leave you miserable. It has to be balanced.

[nzephier]

the biggest dumb thing in the world of love is to try and avoid it. not every relationship you are gonna be in is gonna be perfect. if i expected every girlfriend i ran into to be the dream girl of my life, and everything was gonna be the way i thought it would be, then i would never find someone for me. the best thing to do is tell her from the begining that you have been in one too many relationships that have scarred you. try to tell ehr that you dont expect her to pay for things when you go on dates, but dont expect to see fancy things. and if she does, then you expect something after that...i think u get it... :3

basically, it doesnt hurt to try. and let her know, you are not too sure it will work, but you want to see if it will. then that way it works out for everyone. but dont run away from love, cuz this could be a girl you like.

"its better to have loved and lost, then to not have loved at all"

[Bendt]

Then become a homo.

[dogpup4]

Just tell her you'd go out with her as long as she wouldn't be too demanding.

[Lucy]

Risk it. Not every relationship is the same.

[SgtDK]

Aw man that sucks, you should probably just let her down and tell her you don't want to date her even though it'll be hard for her.

[TJoyal]

That's what a relationship is. Just because you're dating somebody doesn't guarentee you will marry them. Go for it.

[Some-Stupid-Idiot]

There's this girl who had a huge crush on me, so big she wouldn't get near me. We hang out a lot now but tomorrow I'm asking her out. Why? Because I really like her.

[H-K-S]

Do it you queer, just say that you to take it easy. The rule is a bunch of blowjobs the first month, more the next month, and then you'll find love.

[Achilles2]

If you don't take risks, you'll end up living a lonely, depressing life. Here's your chance to take a risk. It's up to you to fulfill your part in the relationship, and then nothing will go wrong. You know that IF it fails (which it won't if you do your part), then it was her fault and you have nothing to be sad about.

Ask her out.

[gibleto]

You should go for it. Really, not all relationships end bad.

[XxdeathpriestxX]

At 11/30/08 04:31 AM, psycho-squirrel wrote: I basically just needed to get that off my chest. I am not going to date her what so ever.
I am trying to learn not to care about how people feel. Only causes me pain and what not.

Apparently u didnt read the responses, so STFU u little worry wart *just sounded gay* o.o fuck, I need to take a walk

[HeartbreakHoldout]

At 11/30/08 04:31 AM, psycho-squirrel wrote: I am trying to learn not to care about how people feel. Only causes me pain and what not.

Eugh, you don't deserve a girlfriend if that's how you see life.

[Ragnarokia]

So you're gay? Ok.

[Some-Stupid-Idiot]

At 11/30/08 09:29 AM, Ragnarokia wrote: So you're gay? Ok.

Oh Mike, he had a girl before. He's nothing like me though. I'm going to risk it tomorrow and hope for the best. I've had both outcomes go through my head. If she still likes me then I'm going to ask her, if she doesn't I'm going to tell her.

[November]

Tell her you're fatter than you appear.