the great conflict. a bbs story

[crazerfish50]

this is the bbs story, the great conflict. it's what will prolly happen when general forum invades art forum. this is a true story. cuz it's gonna happen soon. real newgrounds users are in this. if you're not in it. PM me.

CHAPTER 1: a normal day at art.

it was a normal day on the art forum. most old threads being renewed over and over and over again, with the ocasional spinnoff. minimal flamewar skrimishes were dotted across the map. killer cake was sitting there at his post, looking for intruders to the art forum, when he saw something reach up from the horizon of the great dessert. " what in the world?" he said and got up.

he put his binouculars to his eyes, what he saw, would change the face of the bbs, forever. an entire army of general forum henchman were making there way across the great dessert. killercake didn't know what do do. he called upon a genaral of his post, vortex00. He stared at the many men coming. there were were too many. so many. as some know, art forum has never had as many men as general. but they were good, persistant men. hegathered all those in his regimant. and fought one of the greatest skrimishes ever fought. and it was just the beggining.

[SenorPresidente]

Nice story

[TurtleJuice]

At 6/9/07 08:04 AM, SenorPresidente wrote: Nice story

Zing !

[crazerfish50]

haem.

CHAPTER 2: the middle of the fightin'

in the weeks following weeks after that skrimish, now named 'the crossing' the war between the art forums andd the general forums became a bloody conflict. with the reinforcements of tom fulp being indifferant, and wades army fighting on the side of the general, things looked grim for the art forums.

" so, this is what my BBS has become?" tom said, walking in a dimly lit room. " yes sir. the general forum felt that it could become the ultimatum of the NG BBS. it had beeen making raids on the audio and flash portals all year. no dout recruiting new members." tom looked up from the view screen " why the flash portal? are they trying to turn the entire site into chaos?!" tom was mad at the general forums. althoughe he knew he would never get it back if he joined the art forums. his men were eager to fight, not to mention he would have to take out wade. " who is leading the art forums?" tom asked the general. " we don't know. test-objects main base of operation was attacked. he is probbably dead. tommazza is fighting to restore peace in many forums...and vortex...he has been missing for days" he said grimly."

desser 4:56 P.M

" keep an eye out. general scouts could attack anytime" tommazza said, slowly walking forward with his gun. " theres nothing on my radar sir. it seems its all clear." another soldier said. a soldier looked back at tomazza, " but we should encounter them soon."

[Winned]

Need to work on spelling, and use capitals. Also, make each chapter a little longer.

[crazerfish50]

At 6/9/07 09:47 AM, Winned wrote: Need to work on spelling, and use capitals. Also, make each chapter a little longer.

okay. did you like it thoughe?

[crazerfish50]

At 6/9/07 08:04 AM, SenorPresidente wrote: Nice story

thanx =)

[Greth-of-choas]

I liked it make chapter 3 lol

[McJesus]

Interesting concept.

Needs better grammar.

That, and Chrisseh, Havay, me, Zekey, ShirtTurtle, Razaac, and a couple other art forum regulars. :3

[Tribal]

Alright but a bit short though.

[krakk]

That was the most pathetic excuse for a story I've ever seen. Use your brain before you put your fingers on the keyboard.

[dreaming-loudly]

nothing too flash , id say that the story sucked , but ya know..

[crazerfish50]

due to possitive feedback, heres chapter 3

CHAPTER 3: in the underground

Tommazza woke up in shakkles ouround his legs and neck. His head was spinning, and his arms felt like they were on fire. he looked down at the floor, and there in front of him, were his arms. he wanted to scream, but his throat was so dry, he could only manage a small 'meap' sound. his detaners walked in. they were silhoutes in the dark room. they slid him a plate of food, and left. the food was horrible to even look at. it was a green color with red toppings sprinkled on it. next to it, was a peice of stale bread. he bent down, stuck his face in it, and digged in.

the general forum soldiers had captured and killed many artists. almost none were left. the snakeskull regiment was running around the map with his battalion of soldiers. he was walking along in the cities that use to be grat threads, but were now, brocken relics. " sir, maybe we should give in to them. they came and destroyed half the forum with one wave. i don't know if we can-" shut up! snakeskull yelled at the soldier. he would never give in. he was a veteran of the army of the art forum. he would never give in. " we will make it. listen men, i have a plan. i connected a radio signal with orochimaru and crazerfish. we will meet up with them at fuzz's art thread. there, are men will join up, and attack the enemy". it sounded good on paper, but the problem was, there was a bridge connecting fuzz's arthread to the forum, but the generals soldiers, had blown it up. they would have to find another way when they got to the bridge. IF they made it to the bridge.

Tomazza was still sitting there. he sat, pittifully. he had lost count of how many hours, days, he'd been in that blasted jail. a sillohette walked into the room. tommazza looked up " why did you attack the art thread?" he asked. he wanted to know. the person just stood there, not blinking, not breathing. just standing. " WHY!" he yelled. " WHY DID YOU KILL THOSE ARTISTS! TELL ME!" he yelled, madder than ever. he was fuming, but the person just stood there. " I'LL KILL YOU! I'LL GET OUT OF HERE AND KILL_" the person jumped up, and knocked him out.

[NetWar]

Capitalization, other than that, a nice story.

[El-Duego]

i Dont like it to be honest, but thats just my opinion

[crazerfish50]

At 6/9/07 10:26 AM, El-Duego wrote: i Dont like it to be honest, but thats just my opinion

agh, thats that then. some like it, some don't.

[McJesus]

At second glance, not the best written work I've seen.. but I still like the concept. :3

[crazerfish50]

more sucka! oh, yea, i'm sorry snakeskull

CHAPPTER 4: the fight for the bridge.

Thesnakeskull regiment ran full speed throughe the ctities. general helicopter had caught up with them, and were running full speed. there were 15 men left. the helicopters guns were firing like they were dippendant on it..and they were. orochimaru 556 and crazerfish50 regiment combined, created an army of 700 men, well armed, and had high morale. just then, a general forum caiptan, razzac, jumped from the helicopter, gun blazing, and onto the ladder. the helicopter picked up speed untill razzack was dangling right next to snakeskull. snakeskull tried to pull the gun from him, but razzack hit him square in the head, knocked hi out, and shot his unconsiouse body. he was dead.

His men kept running. running like never before. what happened next, was nothing short of a miracle. vortex00 was ontop of a building, shot the helicopter down. it fell from the skie and with an ear shattering crack, it blew up. there was rubbage, and debree everywhere. vortex ran down from the building to meet the soldiers in distress. they told him the story of what had happened, from the search for orochimaru556, and crazerfish, to the death of snakeskull.

vortex and the men walked along, again on there way to get help. theyre was nothing they could do realy. except walk. walk untill they got there.

[crazerfish50]

another. this might end in one day...

CHAPTER 5: the fight for the bridge part 2

BAM, WIZZ, VZOOM! bullets were flying everywhere. it would seem that the bridge hadn't been destroyed. and orochimaru and crazer weren't there. but there were hundreds of general soldiers. vortex jumped from behind the peice of concrette he was hiding behind and fired. but before she his somebody, a tank from general, rammed from behind the thrad and fired at him, he jumped back behind the concrete, missing the projectile, by inches. a soldier looked at vortex " what do we do sir?? they've got to much ground! we opened a radio signal with-" WWSSHH vortexes radio went off. he picked it up " hello? this is vortex 00." BOOM! " we are under heavy fire from" he ducked, a bullett flew straight throughe the concrete " we are requsting help! I REPEAT!" he screamed the message into the receiver again before it was shot out of his hand. he poked his head above the barricade and blindfired, hopefully his distress signal had made it through.

somewhere else, crazerfish and orochimarus regiments were walking in the countryside. it was so peacefull. birds singing, the sun shining. none of them could beleive that only a hundred miles away. orochimarus radio went off. he heard the message that vortex00 had sent, and plotted a course to help friends in need.

[crazerfish50]

At 6/9/07 11:17 AM, TheSnakeSkull wrote: This is getting good you should put Volit0 is one of the next chapters.

oh trust me, i've got a plot twist.

[OkamiLeadDog]

Nice this would be nice as a flash cartoon

[crazerfish50]

At 6/9/07 11:20 AM, OkamiLeadDog wrote: Nice this would be nice as a flash cartoon

...i am so totally gonna do that when i get it!

[HailFire]

Not too bad.

Also, Mindchamber and his giant robot could kick the asses of like, 80% of the assholes on this forum. :P

That does bring up a good point, though. Why no mods?

[crazerfish50]

At 6/9/07 11:26 AM, HailFire wrote: Not too bad.

Also, Mindchamber and his giant robot could kick the asses of like, 80% of the assholes on this forum. :P

That does bring up a good point, though. Why no mods?

hmm....dunno.

[idiot-monarch]

Hmm. Good for a quick read but it has 4 major problems:
1. Bad grammar.
2. Razac being a bad guy.
3. There was no introduction. The story's moving a bit too fast.
4. I'm not in it ;)

Or will I be? Or am I already slaughtered?

[crazerfish50]

At 6/9/07 11:42 AM, idiot-monarch wrote: Hmm. Good for a quick read but it has 4 major problems:
1. Bad grammar.
2. Razac being a bad guy.
3. There was no introduction. The story's moving a bit too fast.
4. I'm not in it ;)

Or will I be? Or am I already slaughtered?

if you whant to be in it, PM me, and we'll discuss it. okay?

[crazerfish50]

more goodyness! sorry this ones so short. it builds up the susspense.

CHAPTER 6: detanement

tommazza sit there, practicly dead. he was beaten, starved, and dismembered. all he could do was sit there and pray. the door on the wall opened, and in came a silohoute. he just sat there and stared at the floor. " hello." the person said. he sounded like a man, and had a medium pitch voice. tomazza sat. " tell me, why do you love the art forum?" the man asked. surprisingly, tamazza laughed. tel me, why do you love the general?" the man walked into the light. he was a tall man, he had a trenchcoat on, and a scar running down one eye. " my name is mindchamber. i am a moderator, and the reason i hate the art forum, is it's because i got this scar there! i lost lives there! i lost everything there!" he yelled. " well, it would seem, were not so differant.

[crazerfish50]

anymore comments?

[crazerfish50]

4th post, blah blah blah.

CHAPTER 7: reinforcements!

there was a seise fire at the moment. vortex and the remaning men were loading there guns and getting ready for the fighting to begin. one of the soldiers, idiot monarch, was putting a clip in his gun, when it jams. sir, could you look at this, i think it's jammed" he said, handing the gun to vortex. he looked it over, did something, and it slid right in " here" he said, handing it back " it was jammed" he took the gun back and thanked him. " VORTEX! LOOK OUT! hey yelled. but it was too late. a sniper shot flew through the air from a sniper possition in a building, and hit vortex in the head. his lifeless body flew to the floor, blood and brains spewing everywhere. the men emidiatley got up, and made a run for the building. they fought there way to the top, and sat there. waiting for reinforcments...or death..

they spent 4 hours in that buildingg, under heavy fire, untill reinforcements arrived. the enemy was quickly dispached by the overwhelming force of the attack by orochimaru, and crazer. then, the foul news of the fate of vortex00, and thesnakeskull. there were hours of mourning following that..and this was only the beggining.

srorry vortex00.

[crazerfish50]

anyone there?