You wanna know why? Because I can catch a helpless animal, skin it with my bare hands. I wake up muddy, and I go to bed bloody, 'cause I'm a trappin' man. I can brave the nastiest weather, even if it's 80 below. My pa was an elephant, but that's irrelevant. My ma was an Eskimo. I eat rabbits' heads for breakfast, with beaver butt on the side. My mind's magnificent and my body no different, I'm full of trapper pride! I'm badder than the baddest sailor! I make love to women 10 feet tall. I've got a chest of wonder and balls of thunder, I can break right through a wall. I love the sound of metal, snapping on an animal's head. Sometimes they scamper,sometimes they whimper, but they always end up dead. The blood of a fresh-cut rodent is as sweet as brandy wine,and the brain of an antelope tastes like cantaloupem, what a yummy life!
And that's why I'm a badass and your a pussy McPussPuss.