Sorry about the delay. But I did it.
I've beaten evil tom.
And it wasn't even that hard.
He began by tackling/knocking me out and tying me to a pole with my own dental floss. When I wake up he goes into a tyrade full of maniacal laughter and off-color/terribly scripted jokes. He reveals to me his dastardly plan.
The Deblaminator.
evil tom's Deblaminator, once activated, would seek out crappy submissions on the portal and reroute the voting system so that any number vote would register as a 5. So, effectively, all users would only be able to vote 5s on crappy submissions, thus keeping them high and clogging the portal.
"Wait, what about deleting everyone's accounts?," I ask. He gets annoyed at me for interrupting him and tells me that he'll get to that part.
He then goes on to say that the Deblaminator was not then functioning because it needs a negative (or, in his case, positive) trail for the battery to route through.
In this case, a strand of Tom Fulp's hair. And evil tom tells me that he tricked Flouride into getting the hair by making him think that it was his only weakness.
He begins to explain how his plan would delete all users' accounts, but I stop listening. I realize that he must have forgotten that we were in a dental pick warehouse. So I explore my peripheral vision and look for my savior box.
And there it is. The emergency pick.
With a well-aimed kick I break open the glass (over my head, don't ask how I saw it.). Catching the pick in my mouth, I begin to cut myself out of the strands. Once out, before evil tom had realized what happened, I give another kick aimed at his face. He is out for a second, and I use that time on my emergency phone to City Hall.
"Contact Tom Fulp. Tell him to watch his hair."
evil tom gets back up and we banter for a second, and then he charges. Using a strand of dental floss that had just been used to tie me up, I swing from the cieling, and after he passes me I kick him into a box of Dental Picks. It wasn't pretty.
But now I'm here with a Deblaminator. What the heck do I do with it?
