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At 2/16/13 03:50 PM, silverspecks wrote: Great! I look forward to hearing from you again.

At 2/21/13 03:30 PM, RIGg0rMORtis wrote: I'm eager to hear people's critiques!

My schedule has unexpectedly tightened up a notch, so I'll review you both, but it will take a while. School tends to be a killer.

At 2/16/13 02:27 PM, silverspecks wrote: In response to Tomster1000:

After reading your review it would seem as if you only read the very last of the four posts that make up the story. The post you were focusing on could itself be considered the conclusion to my much larger story. I emplore you to read the whole thing as much of what you've brought up can be answered. Also, I try to make an underlying truth in my story fairly obvious without explicitly stating it outright. I would be overjoyed if my readers figured it out.

My bad, I saw

At 2/16/13 12:26 AM, silverspecks wrote: Please delete the other version of this post that has formatting issues.

So I thought it was just one post. I'll read it again and PM you the whole review, otherwise I'd be spamming the whole thread full with one post, haha.

At 2/16/13 12:26 AM, silverspecks wrote: Please delete the other version of this post that has formatting issues.

"Haven't told John this yet," the bartender addressed Julia, "but the bar's gonna be closed next Saturday. Take'n the wife out fer annivers'ry and I couldn't find a replacement."

"Sounds romantic Chuck. Where're you two going?"

"Some fancy-schmancy place I can't pronounce. That good-for-nothing man of yours told her 'bout it, and I already know it's gonna put me out another hundred."

:........

End

Alrighty, let me shed some light on this one.

First thing I noticed: Short. That doesn't mean it's bad, but if you make it longer, you'll be able to put more depth in your story, with more ease. Ofcourse, depth in a story is very important, so try to write a bit more, you've got tons of time left before the deadline and they'll judge every piece the same way, so take your time.

Next thing I saw, was your writing style. You started off without a proper introduction of the characters, which actually turned out good. I understood who was who and it also proves you're quite able of adding characters in the mix, without the need of a whole paragraph of text. Also, you used alot of extra explanation at moments, which was very good. How higher the level of writing, the better you'll get at creating a lively surrounding.
You kept the writing style of every character well split, though I personally would've avoided using words like "he's" instead of "he has" for Julia. She seemed to be alot more literate than the barkeeper, so that extra bit would've made the difference even more clear.

Third thing I checked were the intro and outro. They weren't there. That doesn't necessarily has to be a problem, but here, it felt like a started watching a movie that was already running for a while, so that cost me a bit of my interest. Also, the ending was a bit too abrupt. What's his past? If this was supposed to have a sequel, the ending would've been amazing, but now it just left me hanging.

Writing is a learning process. As you start writing more, you'll start to understand what makes a story good and what makes it worse. Lots of writers can get problem with writers block, but that's most of the time because they feel forced to finish a part of the story on one day. Just take your time and find the right balance between writing and relaxing and you will probably never have that problem again.

The most important thing is though, that you're supposed to have fun. As I read the author's note, I think you have and that's what matters the most. Just keep on writing whenever you feel like it, because your story was quite good, but just needed a bit more length. I'm looking forward to reading your next story for the next contest.

At 2/12/13 12:08 AM, roadguy5 wrote: I just tried to enter my story into the offcial forum, but when I pasted it, I found that it was cut at about halfway. I went to my word doc, did word count and found out that it has about 16,000 characters w/out spaces, and I can't post anymore than around 8,000 characters on a forum reply.

I uploaded the story to my news feed to test out the formatting. Is there any chance I could post a link to that on the official thread, or am I screwed?

Multiple people have done it that way already, so I do not think that would be an issue. Go ahead and put the link in the contest thread, as long as it has less words than 4,000, I'm sure they'll review it exactly the same as any other.

At 2/11/13 04:43 AM, Amaranthus wrote: Is this against the rules?
Theamazingjamez posted an old thing he made rather than writing something especially for the contest.

Why would it be? Think of it as a talent show, an old talent is worth the 1st place as much as someone who just learned something new. Same works for stories, if one of my older stories would've been fitting for this contest, I would've used it too.

At 2/7/13 11:39 AM, 4urentertainment wrote:

At 2/6/13 05:43 PM, Tomster1000 wrote: Wow people, you're keeping it so short... I think I'll really need all the time to write/finetune my story and even then I think I will still spot things I'd like to improve.

This ^

Don't be afraid to take your time! Write, rewrite, revise, throw everything out and start over.

Quality over quantity! We want to prove the writing community can create some really awesome stuff.

At 2/7/13 02:32 PM, The-Great-One wrote:

At 2/6/13 05:43 PM, Tomster1000 wrote: Wow people, you're keeping it so short... I think I'll really need all the time to write/finetune my story and even then I think I will still spot things I'd like to improve.

At 2/7/13 12:47 AM, roadguy5 wrote: I'll be posting mine soon after I finish spell checking and the such, can't wait to read more!

Listen to these two people. Before you post, read and re-read. Read your stories aloud, it will help you catch things that you normally wouldn't. If you can, record yourself either video or audio and listen to it back, it will help. Always spell check and don't trust the spell check with your word processor, always spell check your own stuff. And before you even think of scrolling down to hit that Post button, READ IT AGAIN.

The deadline is March 2nd at Midnight so you have plenty of time. It's not a race and those who submit even on the last day will still be read and judged the same as the others.

Good to see you guys agree. I'm at about 1,000 words now and that's the result of about 5 days of intense writing and rewriting. A good story doesn't just exist out of a good plot, but using the right words can change alot. When writing, every character should be given a personality, which is clearly reflected in the form of writing you use.

As an example, yoosing bad gremmer is noo bat ting, as long as it is part of certain character. Actually, using it on purpose,in the right way, can actually spice up your story. That's no excuse for bad grammar though and should only be used when you're already a bit experienced with writing, as it's easy to misunderstand.

Damn, I hope I'm not decreasing my odds of winning now... ;)

Wow people, you're keeping it so short... I think I'll really need all the time to write/finetune my story and even then I think I will still spot things I'd like to improve. I guess we'll see which one turns out the best. Good luck to those whom have not yet placed their stories, I hope you'll have fun (and maybe win a prize ;) ) I'm quite intrigued by our first judge, tbh, so that's some more inspiration to work with, haha.

Alright, I'm in. Just wait and see.

Well, if you still need a writer, I'm available at the moment, can't promise I'll still be in a couple of days, so if you're still in need of one, pm me.

Hi there peepz, Tomster1000 here! I'm on the look for a good game looking for a (story)writer! I finally got myself some spare time, which I'd like to spend on some good writing! If you are interested in this talent and want to know more, please PM me or, if you truly do not like PMming, ask for my MSN!

With my greetz to the peepz, Tomster1000!