Newgrounds.com — Everything, By Everyone.

go downstairs and have one to two beers, three at most. immediately take off you pants and piss in the kitchen. then, find the most attractive girl, it's okay if it's your sister, and tell her she's beautiful. then knock her out in one smooth punch. cry loudly and awkwardly and fall asleep pantless in the living room. you and your sister will be legends.

At 8/7/09 11:21 PM, Sensationalism wrote: I daresay some trannies look better than real women.

i got to tell you, i'm not a big fan of penises but i'd fool around with an attractive tranny. it's all about the post op man-ladies.

At 8/7/09 11:21 PM, SymbolCymbal wrote: Why were you spying on me and your mom last night.

i love your moms cock

it's genetic.

thanks for the big cock mom!

you drink until she's attractive, or at least until you don't give a shit anymore. you let the words slur from your lips, generic and thoughtless. there's callously spilled beer darkening the fabric of your t-shirt. you hail a cab and take her home. sussurations and intents fill the urine dank seats of your parceled transportation. as you approach your stop, your home, your bed, you salaciously run your fingers up her thigh. your tongues embrace and, uninhibited by drink, you grab her throbbing cock.

transvestites: they live where you live.

sometimes when i'm walking around town and i see a cop car, i book it. for no real reason, it just makes me feel excited. then i post about it on the internet.

At 8/7/09 10:49 PM, RocketBean wrote: Rainbow clay dildo. Give to mother on Christmas.

At 8/7/09 10:48 PM, AronKong wrote: Pingas ;).

i'm drinking and waiting for the roommate to get off from work. what's your guys' excuse for being unoriginal?

dildo. i think you can take it from there.

At 8/7/09 10:45 PM, Chdonga wrote: I don't see the point of that because whenever I see a person with over one thousand posts, I already know that a good sum of his/her postcount is just random two word posts anyways.

hmm...how many threads do you think i could post "say what?" in before there were repercussions? and would the repercussions be worth the ng statistical boost? these are the greater questions that plague this little online community.

post count prejudice is the racism of the sedentary forum nerd. it allows quick assessments of other people's value so that you can carry on with your day. if you have less posts than me, you are a cracker.

i have to tell you, i'm not one for these youtube-made comedy people, this guy cracked me the fuck up. i'd hang out with him as he yelled and slathered us all in a braces-spit laden rant.

after reading some of the back and forth between you and mercator, i'd like to meet this people stupider than you.

who needs a search bar when it's on the first page?!?!?!?!

are you sure you don't withdrawal yourself from your peers because they're mostly male....and you have undeniably homosexual affinities? there is nothing wrong with the way you're feeling.

random guy gets plastered and blows a transvestite hooker. finds out he's kinda gay...sometimes.

if i remember correctly there were some number questions; i.e. distance from curbs, distance from turn to use turn signal, that you should skim the pamphlet for. also refresh on techniques like the safe following distance thing. really cake test though. you'll pass easy.

At 8/7/09 09:42 PM, Sensationalism wrote:

At 8/7/09 09:35 PM, MegamanZero360 wrote: See.. is it just a guy or a girl thats flat?

It's a dude that dresses that way and makes shitty music to get attention.

marilyn manson? ah ho ho ho ha ha ha.

make new friends, those who know that love is boundless. age is merely a number, a restriction set by social norms. you are a trendsetter, a path blazer, a pedophile. be one with yourself.

stop consuming liquids. it's much harder to spill solid matter.

At 8/4/09 10:51 PM, WritersBlock wrote:

Comments: I loved this story, I loved the full, descriptive language, the whole tribal theme, appropriate use of the island. There was a small handful of grammatical and spelling errors, but on the whole, it was really an impressive story. It was enticing, very interesting, I really wanted to read on and find out where your character ended up. Brilliant work.

well shit. i got to say, you really know how to make someone feel good about fourth at best.

read. takes you away from whatever has got you down.

i like the contests. in a way, they're the reason i keep coming here.

At 8/3/09 08:48 PM, Jarvid wrote: The best show ever, if you disagree you haven't watched it

bret mckenzie is my facial hair idol.

you're a bad egg. you've derailed this meeting with another obscure comment. ...

At 8/3/09 09:19 PM, TheLameSauce wrote: i figured i hadn't one.

i meant one. it has parallel value. it's deep. so fuck off.

also i think that i should be able to double post.

i figured i hadn't one. missed a period and accidentally deleted a paragraph that set the final scene. shouldn't have posted in such a haste. congrats to the top three, although i must say one of the entries surprises me it's ranked so highly. but perhaps that's just bitterness rearing its unsightly head.

it just struck me; i could never own a funeral home. i'd be far too tempted to say "if i had a dollar for every time that happened" at very insensitive times. what are some jobs you could never work, and why.

how do you know his job doesn't suck royally and he gets his kicks by razzing the customers?

i vote according to the 0-5 scale. most things get a two. on a side i have more blams than saves so fuck you guys.

it is now august. that is all.

i'm just going to throw out coheed and cambria, particularly second stage turbine blade. i mean...there's fucking comic books people.

find past you and kick the loving shit out of him. it'll be a cycle that repeats itself forever.