I find this topic very interesting. My thoughts on this, as I won't ever read this thread again, I want to get them all out, for the most part.

Women whine about 'being equal', wanting to be allowed the same jobs, or positions in a company, being able to be just as successful in the economic world as a man, they also want to be able to play the same sports as a man, on the same teams... so, they pretty much want to be the exact same as a 'man', in a way. So, why not let them? Treat them the exact same way you would another guy, they want to join the football team, let them, and don't hesitate to slam them to the ground, they want to work in the stockmarket, let them lose all of their money, they want to hit a man, let them get hit back.

But then again, you have to remember that women are physically inferior in every way compared to a man. They aren't built like a man, they simply aren't made to be able to match a man in sze and strength, therefor you have to respect them as a woman. Sure, they might hit you, but when they hit you, it's more than likely in a playful manner. And when in a case such as that, hitting the girl back is unacceptable, and should be punished by you having your ass handed to you by your peers.

So really, hitting a girl for any reason other than her actually punching you with the intent to harm you is a pussy move.

At 9/5/06 10:15 PM, D-Bibz wrote:

At 9/5/06 07:06 PM, teh_God_Father wrote: Hmmm... New people post here every day. I haven't even seen Carrot post lately, must've gotten bored.

Clearly he's busy using every fiber of his existence to combat the injustices and evils of red pandas, masturbation, starbucks, and of course, overcommercialized butter packets and jam jars. And in case you didn't know, those are all intertwined by a dark and evil binding.

Yes, and I feel that people will follow him. It is clearly wrong to masturbate, and Starbucks was created by Satan himself. I for one am glad that Carrot has brought this evil and sinful act to our attention, and I pray that others will follow him!

Also, Moose1015, stop posting, no one is going to answer.

Without America Britian would be no more. End of.

Hmmm... New people post here every day. I haven't even seen Carrot post lately, must've gotten bored.

Yes, you dumbass, I think we all know it reduces the chance of Prostate Cancer, seeing as how this thread has been going to... Three years now? It has been said atleast 100 times or more.

Also, to the other dumbass who seems to believe this thread is serious. This thread is a complete copy of another about Pot, he just changed it to Masturbation, read the start of the thread before making yourself look like a moron.

If ANY women ever gets elected, I'm moving to Canada. Women can't run a country, the government would fall if one did. I doubt she'll win, if she runs.

I'm not worried about any other country Nuking the US. If they did, so be it, we have like 10,000 more than anyone else, and they'd blow up a few of our cities, while we destroyed their entire country.

I really hope this is a joke thread, such as the Illegalize Masturbation one... Because, this is stupid :P

At 9/1/06 08:17 PM, jpofgs wrote: masterbation is a normal reaction who knows without it men may rape more?

If masturbation were to be illegalized the urge may be surpressed aswell. Because of the sexual urge, thousands are raped everyday. I believe masturbation may contribute to this. Illegalize masturbation, give it atleast another generation, and I am willing to bet that the urge to masturbate, or any other sexual activity, will be held back. Except, of course, to reproduce... But only those who are deemed worthy of reproduction are passed through to the 'Reproduction Chambers' that they should create. Therefor, our race would continue, not be held back by sexual urges, and we would soon have a perfect society without mass masturbation, rape, etc... Also, masturbation makes you go blind.

This thread has been going for years, and people still haven't figured out what it really is. Retards will continue to post here saying "@hhhjhh b371n 1337 meet is awsomzorz!!1!11one!" I am actually wondering how long this will go, for weeks, months, or years. I expect it never to die.

At 8/27/06 02:31 AM, shi_huangdi wrote: but A_Carrot, how can i possibly stop, i can't control myself anymore. why didn't you put this up before i started?

Ask to be saved, and God will help you stop! There are therapists trained to help people with this problem, you can quit, you just have to work at it!
Dr.Carrot, I see the light now, I completely agree with you on this subject :)

At 1/7/03 01:30 AM, zanz wrote: I would have liked to have seen this post go on. fucking hilarious man. and its even funnier that people are still posting.

I was reading the earlier posts, from when the thread first started, and found this one. I found it extremely ammusing, seeing as how he thought the thread was going to end now that everyone knew it was a joke. Seems he was wrong.

the cat was out of the bag...but someone caught it and beat it to death with a stick. sorry i had to revisit the first page, i never realised you actually admitted any of this, luckily someone helped me see the light.

You are very welcome, child.

Yes, it seems this thread will never end. People will continue to post after reading the title, instead of reading the first few posts where you ADMIT this is a JOKE. People won't read any of the posts revealing this, and they shall be bitchslapped by everyone that understands what this thread was really created for. Bravo, Carrot dude, you've made the perfect thread to atract the already overflowing population of morons and n00bs.

At 8/24/06 03:33 PM, liandri wrote: the only way to illegalize masturbation would be to fucking monitor our everyday lives. are you retarded?
4-year-olds masturbate...

you're an idiot

Wow, since when CAN four year olds jack off? And how the hell do you know? Do you watch them? Yeah, I like how you call Carrot an idiot.

I was wondering the same thing... Dude, just, shut up now. You'll only look like an ass after you see that this thread is a complete joke. Everything Carrot says is a joke, I hope O.o, and he is doing it to piss people like you off. It works, it got me a few pages back because I deglected to read the start of the thread and a few posts before mine.

At 1/6/03 06:13 PM, A_Carrot_By_Dr_Riot wrote: Oh, man, you ruined it. I could have kept it up for days, but I guess the cat's out of the bag. Yeah, it's satirical, I copied it from a marajuana site and replaced the references to marajuana with masturbation. The laws listed are the Arizona laws for posession/sale/production of marajuana. That's why they all look the same.

I suppose I'll reply to this, incase another unsuspecting victim comes along, he can read that post from three years ago at the start of the thread.

At 8/23/06 05:18 PM, Yuli wrote:

At 1/7/03 08:48 PM, Ted_Easton wrote: oh, and by the way, you're not black. Stop talking like one.
You think ghetto is what people do when they're missing the letter beside P on their keyboard.

I second that.

lmfao XD

Okay Carrot man, don't act like you know shit about rights when you're trying to say no one should have the right to masturbate. And nazi can be used in more ways than one.
Regardless of this being a joke, it really isn't now, is it? I mean, how fucking stupid does it sound to try and pass a law that states "No masturbating" or some such. A useless law, no one would inforce it, what are they gonna do... Post guards at your door? No, I doubt that, they can't even keep people from smoking pot, as we can see Carrot man here does.
I am going away from the BBS for a while, not like I've been here long, but it is really starting to piss me off, hippy-fags that want to make masturbation illegal... Plus I have work to do. So STFU already, fag.

First off, thank you for seeing my higher IQ.
Now, for those of you who do believe that masturbation should be illegalized... You should atleast try to hold some sort of rally or petetion, until then simply shut the fuck up. There is no way, ever, that masturbation will be made illegal, just can not happen, no one would want to move to make that law. Why? I have yet to see any reason why it should be made illegal. Any good reason, that is. So, Carrot man, why should masturbation be illegal? I'd actually like to see why you think it should be.
Look, no Caps Lock, not like I really used it much in my earlier post.
Also, fuck off, bitch. You're gay if you want masturbation illegalized.

Why... IN THE FUCK... Would anyone even TRY to ban it? WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?! Christ, are you some sort of hippy-treehuggin-faggit? Let me guess, you have no genitals? I knew it, must be it, can't pleasure yourself so you think it should be illegal. This shit is so fucking annoying man, lock this dumbass thread, it's like saying Sadam should be let out of jail and put back into power... IT'S FUCKING STUPID, AND AIN'T GONNA HAPPEN. And so what if that guy brought up Hell and shit? Freedom of Postage :) Earlier someone was talking about molestation, what does molestation have to do with illegalizing masturbation?
Dumbass.

At 8/16/06 10:44 AM, A_Carrot_By_Dr_Riot wrote:

At 8/16/06 08:06 AM, teh_God_Father wrote: This is such a useless thread, no one has the money or power to enforce a law such as this. No one in the right mind would even try.

They tried to illegalize alchohol, and they are trying to keep recreational drugs illegal. The Government definitely has the money and power to attempt enforcment and such a precedent surely demonstrates that it is irrelevant whether or not the government is right in the head.

Tried, and trying. But HAVEN'T BEEN ABLE TO. They can't illegalize shit, not unless people decide to STOP doing it, and I very highly doubt people will. They haven't stopped the use of drugs, murder, rape, etc... They just don't have the power.

At 8/16/06 01:36 PM, goldenticket wrote: Heh, in vietnam or north korea or somplace there, you can be beheaded for being caught masturbating.. BEHEADED!

And that's why they're all 3rd world countries.

This is such a useless thread, no one has the money or power to enforce a law such as this. No one in the right mind would even try. Besides, anyone that CAN masturbate, DOES, except for the few that see it as 'Satanic' such as the creator of this thread seems to. Most likely he is unable to pleasure himself, due to a disease he received while having oral sex with one of his relatives, or he simply is a really ugly guy. Molestation has NOTHING to do with this, so why bring it up? Something you want to tell everyone? Hmmm? It is a FACT that masturbation is HEALTHY. Also, I bet you want to outlaw sex aswell? I mean, come now! We wouldn't want to be able to have sex now would we? No! that would be hateful, against the law, and if we did that MUST mean we worship Satan!! :o

At 8/16/06 12:30 AM, mynamewontfitin wrote:

At 8/15/06 11:50 PM, FAB0L0US wrote: You really have no idea what you are talking about. Maybe thats true in the Deep South and small suburbia Midwest but everywhere else, wrong.

Hmm well my experiences tell me otherwise. I was in Virginia for vacation and I stayed at this hotel where I met a bunch of other kids. One of the kids asked me something about a Christian holidy and I told him I was Jewish. He replied, "You're Jewish?!?" Just as I expected, he said no because none lived in his area.

So, you beleived a child new that NO Jews lived in the area? Like he knows everyone? I've never heard so much bullshit, HE might not have met a Jew, but I'm sure there are some that live there. I must admit, though, thinking that none live in the US, close to none, makes me feel better. Not like I care for them.

I hate clocks, and they seem to be overrunning NG lately... I can't find nearly any submisions... THAT AREN'T CRA-Er-CLOCKS!