2 Forum Posts by "sylvrn"
Nice descriptions! One thing I noticed was that your sentences were generally quite long. Just as it's bad to have too many short sentences, it's not great to have so many long sentences. Also, try to check for words that are spelled similarly but have different meanings. This can drive a reader crazy. I like the story though, keep working on it!
while*
attempting to do so......
wasn't done in this manor."
I hear whispers all around me
Yet I cannot fully hear
What sounds that they are making
Do not enter my ear
The ceiling domes above my head
In darkness unforeseen
And books line shelves looking as if
They appear within a dream
There is a room for every soul
And every room is full
Of dark and deepened secrets
That are anything but dull
In every room there is a chest
That lies upon the floor
What is contained within it
Is hard to truly ignore
For this contains the darkest thoughts
The corners of the mind
That plague the thoughts of justly people
Who seem to be quite fine
But harbor dark and haunting thoughts
That they attempt to leave
Although they know that in their core
Forever they will grieve
No difference, though, I do believe
That secrets always deepest
Forever stay in dark retreat
In the Library of Secrets.
