Sup gais, wut do ya tehnk abt tat?
If you just raised your eyebrow at that terribly typed statement, and are now thinking of a 'witty' way to say "dude learn to type proper english jeez" , chances are: you're a douche. I bet your morning routine includes applying gel to your hair and spiking it. Overdoing it.
Oh hey dudes, I don't really like Dream Theater, Jeff Portnoy is a shit drummer. I'll stick to my Coldplay and its trusty Will Champion at the drums, thank you very much.
If you just RAGED at that statement lambasting the awesomeness of Dream Theater, and me not knowing that the name's Mike Portnoy, not Jeff Portnoy, you may be a metalhead, ro just have good taste, and that's okay. But, if you're typing out an angry rant lambasting Coldplay and me, you may be a douche. I bet you have a few pairs of shutter shades in the dresser.
Dude, I have over 9000 posts. Fuck you, Imma firin mah lazor at only 2% power, and you're still OWNED bitch.
I bet you're going to tell me memes aren't funny and how I'm an idiot for using them too. Oh goodness me, how can one be an idiot for using widespread jokes or finding said jokes funny? Different people have different senses of humor, accept that. But if you still go on your tirade of "fucking noob" at people who 'type funny' or 'seem stupid' then you are the ultimate douche. You look down at people based on your impression of them online. Sickening. Just like the glow of that spray tan.
You all have no life, you losers are just pathetic worms trying to feel accepted in a community because the real community shunned you. Enjoy those countless hours at the computer chair, eating Cheetos while talking to you "internet girlfriend". I spit on you.
If you're going to deny that, and post pictures of your supposed "girlfriend" or type a comeback saying that I'm the one with no life, or something to that effect, you're probably conscious about public perception. But if you really have no life and instead provide fabricated proofs of your wonderful outside life, then you're just pathetic. You're not even a douche because there is nothing to brag about, there are no hot chicks to use as a trophy around your arm, there is no hair gel, there is no spray tan, there is no shutter shades, there's only you and your pathetic existence.
But, there's always turning that anger into sick amusement. Instead of getting angry, you can go along with these people you dislike and hold a grudge on for being different on the internet. You can make subtle jokes, subtle pop culture references, subtle hints at hatred, shit like that. You don't have to voice your hate so openly that you'd bother a fine upstanding citizen of Earth because of the way he types or thinks or expresses himself over the internet. You don't have to waste anybody's time, like your time.
You can always...
tl;dr : ( ? ) the internet is not real life, you have no excuse to criticize people for their opinion, grammar or so on and so forth
