Newgrounds.com — Everything, By Everyone.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gw5ayibQ-E0

First of all, hilarious. Second of all, anyone know what this machine is called?

At 1/25/14 01:34 PM, Thor wrote:

At 1/25/14 01:30 PM, mikel-scott wrote:

At 1/25/14 01:29 PM, Thor wrote:

At 1/25/14 01:27 PM, mikel-scott wrote: Am I retarded?

Yep.

Or are you retarded for not being able to help?

I am able to help, I'm just choosing not to.

Well played sir... Comon i'll be your pal

At 1/25/14 01:29 PM, Thor wrote:

At 1/25/14 01:27 PM, mikel-scott wrote: Am I retarded?

Yep.

Or are you retarded for not being able to help?

Am I retarded? I can't find a torrent for the 2013 movie Nebraska... It's oscar nominated and i've heard nothing but good things plus macgruber took a break from ripping throats to star in it so it's strange that pirate bay is coming up blank... Anybody else having the same 1st world problem?

At 5/4/13 03:56 PM, ChaRee wrote:

At 5/4/13 02:00 PM, mikel-scott wrote: To summarize, it's mostly due to
-daddy issues
-self-esteem issues
-a woman's desire for an alpha male
-human nature: we want what we can't have
-the challenge / the game of taming a bad boy

Right, so if I like what you consider a dickhead it must be because I want my dad to fuck me, I'm depressed or for some challenge?

Look, instead of making lists why girls are fucking guys other than you, go out and better yourself. We don't try to date ass holes, we don't try to date primitive dickheads, we try to date guys who get shit done without complaining. They don't need to be built like a tank and fight everyone, they just need to be mature and not be a whining cunt about everything.

Good comment thankyou. I know my logic is primal and Freudian but that doesn't mean its wrong. You're absolutely right and you obviously know more about what you go for than I would, but based on what you say you'd rather go for a dickhead than a pussy no?

At 5/4/13 03:00 PM, LDAF wrote: I came in to find interesting discussion, and found some reasonable points in the OP's argument. Then I saw him try to use logic in his arguments against users like Sekhem. :c

Logic? I was just being cocky. I also started this for interesting discussion so please, if you have any points share them.

At 5/4/13 02:53 PM, Timmy wrote:

At 5/4/13 02:14 PM, mikel-scott wrote: Now i know i'm not a pussy because i could slap the taste out of your mouth

Just because you're a "tough guy" who can punch a dude doesn't mean you aren't a pussy - you could still turn into a quiet, unconfident mousey dude as soon as a woman walks into the room.

Ya totally, being badass doesn't equate to being good at bar fights (though those two aren't necessarily mutually exclusive). Einstein was a badass and he probably never went into a gym. It means being confident and believing in what you do and sticking up for yourself.

At 5/4/13 02:29 PM, Darthdenim wrote: I really tired of hearing guys complain about this.

Just act like an asshole if you want to get laid so damn bad! Problem solved.

No compaining, just commenting. Why are you content to accept that? I was raised to be polite and courteous to women, don't you want to know why that's invalid?

At 5/4/13 02:27 PM, DaveMan-CI wrote: You only think they are dickheads because they are dating the girl you like.

Actually no i'm dating the girl I like which is partially due to the fact that I am a dick.

At 5/4/13 02:17 PM, Scintillating wrote: In this guy's dictionary 'dickheads' has been redefined as "Guys that aren't me."

You dunno me and I have no need to validate myself by bragging on a forum by detailing my sexual exploits. But do you disagree? You've never seen a girl go for a guy with asshole tendancies?

I been drinking green tea all god damn day, you gonna bring the demons outta me?

And don't worry about it, i'm got the leprosy, my dick fell off so i'm trying to help other dudes

At 5/4/13 02:06 PM, Sekhem wrote: 1. pussies like yourself aren't attractive to women

that's the only reason

quit making excuses for yourself

You're obviously an intelligent, sentient human, thanks for that sensical comment! Now i know i'm not a pussy because i could slap the taste out of your mouth but since you're such a hot shot I'd love to hear how you do it. what women do find attractive in you besides your awesome basement suite in your moms house?

Why do girls like assholes?

I made a video that I think does a pretty decisive job of explaining it (available at www.thereason.cc) but i'm curious to know if i missed anything?

To summarize, it's mostly due to
-daddy issues
-self-esteem issues
-a woman's desire for an alpha male
-human nature: we want what we can't have
-the challenge / the game of taming a bad boy

What do you guys think?

I am doing a project to support American involvement in the wars in the middle east. I want to make people see how the U.S. has only tried to help and they are getting treated so poorly! I need some video footage depicting the atrocities committed against U.S. soldiers. Youtube doesn't really have any that I can find, do you guys know of any from any movies or anything?

Thanks! USA!

At 38 minutes ago, yurgenburgen wrote: I like how you use words like "fuck", "shit" and "asshole" to appeal to the kids. Very modern.

sarcasm doesn't translate well on the internet. are you making monkey shines about my technique?

sexcellent, thanks man!, lemme know what you think of the end if you find time to finish

I really, really like it. :D

Nothing wrong with it so far.

At 28 minutes ago, PIED3 wrote: So how do i check it out?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ub1FGeccdjY

That's part 1. It's split into 9 parts (to accommodate Youtube)

Sup NG

long story short of my message is I have a movie I'm selling to young people and I need someone to check it out and let me know what they think. It's not spam because because newgrounds is the only place I'm going for critique. I trust this community, I did the same thing with my other video "The Reason - The top 10 things girls look for in men"

Anyway, this video is unnamed so far but it's about the most important things young people think about. I might call it "10 (or so) Facts of Life" The topics covered in the video are sex, drugs. success,happiness, religion, and a whole grab bag of other fun dinner conversation worthy topics. Watch the 4 minute intro and you'll get an idea of what it's about.

Check it out, orrr don't!

Thanks for yo time nuckas

ps. Some of the content is controversial. I have a doctorate in arguing and am looking forward to verbally humiliating anyone who feels like trolling so bring it if you think you got it

At 4/13/11 04:13 PM, mothballs wrote: The damn video is over an hour and 45 minutes long. Can you just tell me the top 10 things right off the bat, I don't want to sit there and watch a fucking video for nearly 2 hours.

Sure. It takes 4 years to get a University degree but since you asked so nicely would you like one of those too?

chicks are complicated, there is a lot to learn, I could've made it 10 hours and still had more to say.

At 4/12/11 07:04 PM, InsertFunnyUserName wrote:

At 4/11/11 06:28 PM, mikel-scott wrote: And I'm done with you "insertfunnyname". enjoy being a virgin. if you wine and dine me right i might take pity and break your hymen for you

The articulate, logical and mature manner in which you constructed your insightful counterarguments in this post is truly a testament to your emotional and intellectual superiority. I would be honored if you would break my hymen. Make me a woman, baby.

I was jk actually. I have standards. Ill make a new video to teach you how to get guys to like you though.

At 4/11/11 08:31 PM, CaveStoryGrounds wrote: An interesting video, nothing any readily intelligent person didn't already know...but interesting video none the less. The beginning of it with the woman bouncing topless on a man-powered trampoline wasn't a great start but you finished up nicely.

The points you made are indeed accurate. But since everyone is dramatically different, not everyone likes the way the "game" is set up, which constantly changes the points you bring up in the video start to lose strength. I would say on average you'd probably be correct, but I hope not everyone follows this list and just be themselves. Be human.

Thanks for the feedback pal, much appreciated. This guys is totally right btw, The video is just advice about my experiences and IN GENERAL the things that girls like. To get girls you really do have to stop trying so hard and just be yourself. Unless yourself is a lazy non-working, boring, uninteresting, smelly piece of shit. Then you probably should switch things up.

the power of ICE compels you

If you bring me 10 deer heads you can have either one of my sisters. These are they

And I'm done with you "insertfunnyname". enjoy being a virgin. if you wine and dine me right i might take pity and break your hymen for you

At 4/10/11 09:06 PM, TheBlueRaven wrote:

At 4/10/11 09:06 PM, KillerClam wrote: men

are delicious

when they're hard

At 4/8/11 05:18 PM, X-TERRORIST-X wrote: Not going to lie, I just watched that entire video haha. What a way to spend an hour.

It was surprisingly well done, and had good tips. I'd recommend it.

Thanks mate!

and to respond to the guy a few posts up (InsertFunnyUserName): chilllllllllll obviously the video is about how to be social. First off you just skimmed through it, clearly missing everything important. 2nd, duh it's not about forming long lasting relationships. If you want a relationship get a friend. The James Bond impersonation as I said, in clear enlglish, is just an example of how to walk confidently because that is an important step. Every girl on the planet wants to bang James Bond and that is just 1 example of 1 thing that 1 badass does that you can, and should, emulate.

If you don't like my shit cool man it's all gravy, I am new to this game. It doesn't mean you have to come here and go spouting off at the mouth about something you didn't even watch in entirety. I do have feelings you know :'( . I'd tell you to lick my butthole if i wasn't worried you actually might.

AHAHAHAH classic simpsons. Bet Conan had something to do with this tomfoolery

At 4/3/11 07:31 PM, Gasthecar wrote: This was just a bunch of films, the goy's an idiot, anyone who believes it is an idiot, movies aren't real life.

quick response to this hate. btw chill on the hatorade champ. Duh its a bunch of films. I had to put something there otherwise it would just be me talking and nobody would give a shit. movies aren't real but the lessons taught in the clips ive shown are.

At 4/7/11 06:30 PM, unconsidered wrote: How about this:

Birchmen gets caught in the laundry mat when every detergent explodes. Normally, the detergent would cause materials to shrink; yet the combined detergents somehow mengeled with Birchmen's perspiration and the weave of his clothing, reversing the shrinking process and creating Birchmen into a 50 foot monster. Poor devil.

Birchmen proceeds to devote the remainder of his life to squashing those littler than him. He starts with Rebecca Black but continues on to Justin Bieber and in a final climactic scene eats George Bush.

Throw some boobies in there somehwere and I think we have winner

At 4/7/11 06:22 PM, AnalPenguinFarming wrote:

At 4/7/11 06:20 PM, mikel-scott wrote: So far I've got the following: Big boobed stripper goes on bloody revenge spree against an evil government because religion wouldn't allow her to be with the one she loves.

Why would she go on a bloody revenge spree against an evil GOVERNMENT when her RELIGION won't let her be with the one she loves.

zero sense\

welllllllllllll i was half kidding. I wish there was a sarcasm font.

open to new ideas here. that was mostly just a joke of me smashing as many high octane controversial words as I could together