At 11/22/09 02:16 AM, Ragnarokia wrote:

At 11/22/09 02:15 AM, Luxury-Yacht wrote:

thank you for finally putting my soul to rest

Who are you?

OH GOD

I AM CAST BACK INTO THE BURNING HELLS OF INTERNET OBSCURITY

ohhh noooooo

oh god finally

I've been waiting years for this thread

every night, I stay online until 3:45 AM, refreshing the General thread list every 13 seconds and control + F'ing my own name, just praying that someone will mention my name in a thread title

so many sleepless, tear-filled nights

so many melancholy dreams

so much angry masturbation

thank you for finally putting my soul to rest

I know nothing about Kay guitars, but I will say that I like the one you have there.

I want to punch the 19 year old that fucked her in the fucking dick for doing that.

At 11/20/09 09:10 PM, Head-Full-Of-Acid wrote:

hah, not too many people quit smoking pot

I don't think that's true. I think that a lot of people just grow out of it,

That was FUCKING. AWESOME.

every "experimental" girl on the internet is merely a plant hired by the government to lure males into meeting them on internet dates and then castrating them and feeding the testicles to Hillary Clinton

At 11/19/09 09:29 PM, averageroadkill wrote:

Haha, yeah. I'm the one starting shit. Ooooooh boo-fucking-hoo the movies that you preferred didn't win. "Holy fucking shit what is wrong with you people how could you possibly have opinions that differ from mine!?" Well guess what, the majority of voters don't agree with your points and this is proven by the fact that CRIMINAL IS THE MOVIE THAT WON, SO TOO BAD. NONE OF YOUR POINTLESS RANTS CAN CHANGE THIS FACT.

Can you fucking explain to me what is good about "Criminal!"? DO IT. Fucking do it. Explain to me why that single movie is deserving of being the gem of 2009. Explain to me why that movie is better than the dozens of other movies in several different categories.

I'm not asking for Tom to change the results. That's ridiculous, they've already been decided. I don't expect to change anything. What I would LIKE is for SOMEONE to put forth some DECENT MOTHERFUCKING EFFORT into explaining WHY "Criminal!" won over so many other entries that just seem so much better to me in so many different ways.

I understand that people have opinions about the movie. However, I'd like some opinions and reasoning that go deeper than "OMG LOL HIS FACE IS SOOOO FUNNY 10000/10000 POINTZ LULZ" to help me understand how it won.

So, instead of coming out and being an utter prick and calling me a whiner (which I probably am", why don't you at least TRY to be constructive and tell me WHY THAT FUCKING MOVIE DESERVES TO WIN WITH REASONING PERTAINING DIRECTLY TO THE QUALITY OF THE MOVIE IN QUESTION. Why did it get so many votes? Why was it even nominated? MAKE ME FUCKING UNDERSTAND, YOU BLISTERING CUNT.

At 11/19/09 06:59 PM, averageroadkill wrote: Hey, Luxury-Yacht, your precious Krinkels didn't make up that facial expression, you stupid ass. It originated from the most popularJapanese message board of all time, 2ch. Get your facts straight before you get your panties in a bunch and go off on huge rants spreading bullshit next time.

I said Krinkels USED that face, I didn't say he INVENTED it. I'm not even a Krinkels fan, I actually find his stuff to be okay at best. I didn't say where the face actually came from because that's totally irrelevant. That point is not the main argument I'm making, and you're pointing it out because it's the only part of my post that could be misconstrued as being inconsistent. You're just trying to start shit by being a dick, and it's obvious.

At 11/19/09 06:31 PM, Dragonheart91 wrote: I was really hoping for one winner per category or a top 5/10. Still only one cash payout, but a finals amongst the best in each category or just #1. I think that would give more exposure to more things for the same money.

I actually was just thinking the same thing.

At 11/19/09 05:00 PM, TomFulp wrote:

At 11/19/09 04:46 PM, Luxury-Yacht wrote: How does "Criminal!" win when pitted against these entries:

I really can't give a perfect answer about why one movie wins over others, but I'll say I'm happy to see people debating over movies that had previously gone unrecognized.

Well, I'm relieved that I'm not coming off as a TOTAL asshole, then.

Still, I'm looking through the "funny" nominees page, and looking at the votes, and I'm seeing some weird shit.

"Criminal!" got about 15 or so votes, give or take a couple mentions that were just mentions and not straight up votes. One of those votes was from the guy who suggested it. One vote was made today, which doesn't factor in. Then there are 8 votes made by people who have 5 or less BBS posts and haven't been on the site long. I just feel like they don't know what the fuck they're talking about, to be absolutely blunt. Shit, I bet the only reason a lot of people watched it was because the facial expression on the submission icon is a rip-off of the same face that Krinkels uses from time to time.

The more I think about it, the more I become actually angry. These fucking kids really fucked this up. How does "Criminal!" get that many votes, when something like this:

WhatD'YouThinkOfMyDadNow?, by BenjaminMarker Type: Movie Rating: Ages 17+

gets just over half as many? It's a God damned travesty. Seriously, I'm going to compare these two flashes.

ANIMATION/ART: "WhatD'YouThinkOfMyDadNow" wins. Hands fucking down. No contest. Case closed. It has multiple backgrounds, detailed character designs, smooth animation and lip syncing, the whole bit. Meanwhile, the art/animation in "Criminal!" was just not even remarkable except in that it was lacking overall. I mean, I get that the artist was going for a certain style to go with the story, but I feel like his attempt fell WELL short of what he was aiming for. If it was glitchiness he was going for, he barely broke the threshold of that style. If it was quirky scribbles, the animation was far too stiff and lifeless for that to work. The use of color was boring as all fuck. Frankly, the whole thing could have been done in MS Paint and come out better.

HUMOR: Again, "WhatD'YouThinkOfMyDadNow" wins easily. It may be a bit too twisted for some, but isn't NG supposed to be twisted when it wants to be? Aren't some of the most memorable and cherished flashes on this site the kind of thing you wouldn't want your parents to see (e.g. anything by Marc M., Stamper's "Rebecca", etc.)? Now, look at "Criminal!". Personally, I did not find this funny. I have a decently broad sense of humor, but this just didn't work for me at all. It just seemed trite and contrived, like it was predictable and stale before it even happened. The only humor that could be derived from this flash can be from two sources: the absurdity of the situation in the flash, and the faces the characters make. The absurdity wasn't funny after the first 30 seconds, because after that, it was just predictable and dull. The faces would only amuse the kind of person who pisses themselves laughing whenever someone says "IT'S OVER NINE THOUSAAAAND". I am saying this as someone who LOVES humorously drawn faces. I love a funny face. For example, look at most of Slintas' work. His facial expressions are all over the place, and always work well. The expressions in "Criminal!" are never very detailed, and when they are, they're poorly done. The main facial expression of the main character is based off of another picture, and Krinkels has used it several times. An example:

Short - Crap, by Krinkels Type: Movie Rating: Ages 17+

The "funny facial expressions" in that flash are simply regurgitations of things that have already been proven to be popular. No innovation was made. No risks were taken. And that is a shame.

VOICE ACTING: "WhatD'YouThinkOfMyDadNow" wins again. Good sound quality, and actual good voice acting, as well as a good script. The voices are creative and easily differentiated from, like the Jamaican accent of Mountain Mouse to the strange English dialect of the opening characters. Great timing, and great inflection. Really great work.
And back to "Criminal!". Big surprise, nothing special. Mediocre sound quality, shitty voices, and overall average to below average voice acting skill. Nothing exceptional here.

In all three of these categories, "WhatD'YouThinkOfMyDadNow" wins EASILY. The only one that could even really be up to debate would be the humor aspect, because tastes in humor vary so greatly, but even then, "WhatD'YouThinkOfMyDadNow" wins.

All this stuff, and that's only comparing ONE flash from ONE category to "Criminal!". There are other submissions arguably better than "WhatD'YouThinkOfMyDadNow", and yet they were beaten by "Criminal!"?

This is a clear example of how community voting can really go to shit. No other entry got more support than "Criminal!" to my knowledge, and yet, it really doesn't deserve that much attention. Hell, half the votes for it were by fucking 14 year olds who just found the God damned internet and still think that "That's what she said" qualifies as automatic comedic GOLD.

I'm actually really confused with the Gem Winner for movies. I thought that the pool of contestants was actually quite competitive in multiple categories, and I was pleased with that selection- but having "Criminal!" win the overall contest, well, that just absolutely came as a shock.

I hadn't watched it when it was nominated, so I played it today expecting something really quirky and unusual, seeing as how there were so many good entries this year. So I'm watching it, and it's nothing special, but I think to myself, "just wait, it'll probably pick up unexpectedly and get good, be patient", but nothing ever came. Frankly, it was a let down.

How does "Criminal!" win when pitted against these entries:

WhatD'YouThinkOfMyDadNow?, by BenjaminMarker Type: Movie Rating: Ages 17+

Tea., by FortressRubbish Type: Movie Rating: Ages 13+

Adventure Prohor and Puzo, by Kol-Belov Type: Movie Rating: Ages 13+

Flute, by Teshla Type: Movie Rating: Everyone

king pepe, by auntyrae Type: Movie Rating: Ages 13+

Hny (happy New Year!), by Kol-Belov Type: Movie Rating: Ages 13+

The Travelling Sandwich, by MasterAardvark Type: Movie Rating: Ages 13+

A Great Big Tree, by idiot-monarch Type: Movie Rating: Everyone

Ambition, by EvilMufasa Type: Movie Rating: Everyone

Dolores Rides Again, by WoodenSneakers Type: Movie Rating: Adults Only

These are only a handful of good submissions, and there are many more I didn't mention. Just about all of the ones I mentioned are easily better than "Criminal!", and a lot of the ones I didn't mention are also better.

I'm looking at "Criminal!", and I am baffled. The animation wasn't very good. It could have been worse, yeah, but it could have been MUCH better as well. I understand that it may work well with stick figures, but even then, those stick figures could have been FAR more dynamic. The humor was virtually non-existent. I smirked once at the beginning, but the rest was just boring to watch. The jokes just seemed totally impotent and nothing of note. The voice acting wasn't good, either. Not just the sound quality, but also the actual voice acting.

I'm watching this, and I'm not seeing many redeeming qualities. I'd score it at about a 2.50 or so. I certainly wouldn't want to watch it more than once, considering the fact that I didn't want to even have to finish the whole thing the first time. It sort of fell into the whole "low-production, weird style, absurd situation" classification, but there were other entrants that were of similar nature to "Criminal!" that were much better.

The only reasoning I can imagine behind making this the winner of the undiscovered gem competition is that it won based on its sheer obscurity. It certainly qualifies as undiscovered and overlooked, certainly- but I would NOT call it a GEM.

I'm not mad about this, since I neither gain nor lose anything no matter what flash is named the winner. I'm just absolutely clueless as to why this won, and I'm feeling frustrated because I feel like other submissions are getting shafted and one submission is getting attention I just can't bring myself to believe it deserves.

BREAK OUT THE NAAN BREAD, IT'S A CELEBRATION

At 11/18/09 07:33 AM, DingoTheDog wrote:

The Welfare State in britain is more based on the idea that there is little point in actually trying to get a decent job because you can get a shite load on welfare anyway. If a girl gets herself up the duff 4 times the government might give her a 4 bedroom council house. She can then buy this council house at a minute fraction of the cost and then sell it on for full value before applying for a new council house.

Then you should hate the system, not the people the system affects. What, do you think that the desperately poor control welfare legislation? The system is at fault here.

Things are changing now and there is a lot of people who are honestly trying to find work but struggling due to the recession.

Yes, and a lot more people have become poor or homeless due to the economic circumstances. They used to have jobs and such, but they lost it all. There's no reason to hate them.

This is really funny and well done. The harmonica feature made me crack up. Definitely makes me wish this was a real phone.

At 11/18/09 09:39 AM, MrFinland wrote: Freddie Mercury from Queen.

This should have been the first response.

So I smoked last week, and a friend lit my joint for me while I had it in my mouth. I also have long hair.

Later that night, I kept smelling something, like I smelled like smoke, and I just started sniffing all of my clothes and finding nothing, but the smell kept coming and going.

I went to bed, and when I woke up, I realized that he had set some of my hair on fire, and it kept dangling under my nose.

I was amused.

At 11/18/09 12:54 AM, JamesTKirkV2 wrote:

At 11/18/09 12:44 AM, Chumbawamba wrote: If you wanted to be more inspiring, you'd state some facts about the 9/11 conspiracy in the thread rather than just linking to that old video.

I remember watching it when I was 15 and being pretty impressed by it, but I was meek back then.

Gobbletee goo.

You want some facts?
How about this. Pictures of the pentagon show a hole in the side of the building. Claims it was hit by a plane. A 747 is far too big to have left a hole that small. And by the way, where's the plane? Several men were seen carrying one jet engine away. A 747 has four. As for the rest: the fuselage, the wings, the cockpit, no where to be found.

There's no way of proving whether the remains of the plane were removed before that photo was taken or not. Also, it wasn't a 747, it was a 757, which is definitely smaller than a 747.

We are also told that the buildings were brought down by fires. No steel building in history has fallen from fire damage. Also, both buildings managed to fall directly into their own footprints at free fall speed. I thought the only thing wrong was it got hit with a plane. Right? No. This is obviously a controlled demolition.

It wasn't just fire. A terrorist didn't light the building on fire, a plane was flown into it. That produces enormous kinetic force on the building, and then the fire damage and explosive damage needs to be added. Besides, a case of controlled demolition large enough to take down the WTC would be a HUGE project. People would have noticed that shit.

Have you heard of building 7 of the WTC? Little fire that spread about 3-4 floors. Supposedly this is the reason this building collapsed. And despite dozens of floors with support stucture made of steel and concrete simply went poof, down it went. Again, obviously a controlled demolition.

There were several fires in that building, and one face of the building took heavy damage from debris caused by the collapse of the North tower.

You're a fucking moron.

At 11/17/09 06:13 PM, CapnCrunchDaPimp wrote: Have you even ever heard of Atom Mother

Atom Heart Mother is one of Pink Floyd's most impressive pieces. I'm not that big a Floyd fan, but AHM is just really good.

At 11/14/09 07:45 PM, TheThing wrote: So judges.... how's it going?

Not so well, I haven't even started. Just like I feared, I got nailed with a fuckton of work. I'm almost done. All I have left to do is complete a financial management semester project I haven't even started yet that is due this Thursday, do a take-home quiz, do math homework, study for a math quiz, and make up an exam. So the end is in sight, and I'll have plenty of time to do my judging over my Thanksgiving break.

I got my phone for free about 4 or 5 years ago, and I don't pay for anything since it's on a family plan, and I don't text.

So when you start whining about the price of your phone and how your provider is charging you ridiculous rates because you're tied into the contract because of your phone model, I won't give a shit.

At 11/17/09 06:32 AM, DingoTheDog wrote: I recently came to the conclusion that I hate the poor.

Not the starving africans or people from poor nations, the poor people I hate are the poor people in Britain. Throughout childhood we are given opportunities that are not available to those of less developed nations.

Not if you're born to a penniless family or to an unmarried crackwhore.

Yet we still have a cuntload of benefits dependant welfare junkies whos criminal records span several pages.

When a family reaches 3 generations of unemployed welfare dependant scum then the entire family should by chemically castrated.....and then shot.

Poverty is often generational because of the environment that the younger generations grow up in. If you grow up in a slum with no money and poor education, you're probably not going to find a decent job.

At 11/16/09 07:33 PM, JKMonkey wrote: "Arguing with Idiots" by Glenn Beck and I must say, it is a very funny and entertaining book, even though i disagree with many of his points I must say he is a very entertaining man.

That's not literature, that's making a profit off of manipulating people.

I used to read stuff by political pundits in 8th and 9th grade, and then I just grew out of it after I realized that they weren't worth reading because you can't tell where they're being sincere and where they're trying to mislead the reader.

The Fate of Africa.
http://www.amazon.com/Fate-Africa-Hopes-
Freedom-Despair/dp/1586482467

I am a Fox News correspondent in Rome, a hockey player, a baseball player, and an author.

First, I would finish high school, because if you're going to put out a resume that says you never finished it, that's going to really hurt your job chances.

Second, some resume tips. Don't use flowery language and bullshit around, get to the point quickly. Don't waste the hirer's time with unnecessary stuff, just tell them what they need to know. Make the layout easy to read and understand.

Firth's "Dog of Man" was one of the most disturbing flashes I've seen in a long time.

At 11/15/09 04:11 AM, MadCow wrote:

thats the stupidest wish i ever heard what if it came true huh youd feel like a big dumb faggot for wasting the one wish that actually got granted in your life on something so metaphorically comparable to mental retardation

I fucking love you man

I can't remember the last time I saw an outie belly button.

I wish I could go back and experience Pokemon Blue for the first time on a brand new Gameboy Color all over again.