Apprently when i was about 4 i had one of those massive play school torches and decieced that my mum had been on phone too long so i apprently belted her in the eye with it.

The black eye was a pearler apprenlty!!

dont remeber doing this but it was recorded(and then that bit wiped), so who knows?

Thought id mention that the guys G-spot is up their arse and women dont possess cocks so....

Though i must say my gay friend said i ride it dry! which made me cringe and think that must be painful for both parties involved. And they are more likely to sleep around and cheat. Still men dont whinge when you see two lesbains going for it but whine when gays do.

But everyones got thier own veiws and mine is, so long as they arent hurting anyone, then let them be. Better to be gay and happy with someone they love than pretend to be straight and be unhappy.

There is a place in the uk called Brown Willy. Think its near cornwall!!

And yeah cockermouth is in cumbria, been there once. Shame bout the floods though.

At 11/21/09 05:49 PM, hashpimp101 wrote: Where is that delete button?

I can't find it anywhere.... OMG I must delete!!!

There are some posts I made that I wish I have never made before.... PLZ Tell me there is a delete button. OMGF!

Nope" Once youve said it, thats it!!

At 11/21/09 04:41 PM, Porkchop wrote: Tell his boss to fire his ass and hire your ass instead, you're clearly more knowledgeable about games.

He is the boss unfortunalty. And no id hate to work in a game shop, they get so crowed!

I was buying Ds games in one of the games shop in my town and saw Alien Hominid for GameBoy!! So i said to the guy, "OH WOW!! Newgrounds game!!"

The guy had NO fucking idea what Newgrounds was! WTF?? Im a lass and the other guy in the shop ive talked to is a member on here and i had a good natter about this place and saying about Catz gone wild(hey the game picture looked liked 2 cat lesbains fighting!) So HIII if that guys on!

Still, how can i educate him about this wonderful place? And further still, he seems to know lil about games. Youd think someone who works in a place like that would know his games better?

Hex Hex.

Now that was one weird ass game. Think i hated it more as i always remeber my mate knocking over my wine glass full of aftershock onto the cream carpet!!(thank fuck it was her dads crapet XD ) It was the last bit of that drink :(

Ahh times tables!! Man i feel old now thinking about that!! But yeah, only now have i FINALLy managed to get things i want, if id have said to my mum "Oh get me this!" shed have cracked me.

See no one smacks kids anymore and look at them now.. lil stuck up bastards. A crack never did me no harm.

Bring back the cane!

And yeah, i hate kids like that, they dont know how hard life actually is the stupid fucktards. Just wait till daddy dear makes them work...oh the drama!!

I know, its fucking ridiclous! I remember when life was so good and care free. FFS they even have their own phones, ipods and shit like that!

Man i dont give a shit what anyone says, the old days where the good days, hell look at me now, a week off bringing in another child into the world *sigh* lets hope i can teach it not to grow up into a slag/male tart

Yup im honest, more brutal when angry though. Whats the point in lieing anyway? If youre boring then live with it and make ya life more exciting...

And yes im in a grumpy fucking mood :D

Too many people >:C I want to move my birthday to March. No one is born in March.

Funny thing is that people born in november where concived in march!! And yeah, seems to be a bunch of babys being born this month(me adding to that). So guess we should ban fucking in march!

At 11/5/09 05:22 PM, CapnCrunchDaPimp wrote: Really? I think it's kind of cute. Sure, it looks a little sickly but it has big brown eyes and it's smiling. I was pretty sure this dog had it in the bag. Yes, that is a dog by the way. He won the title on the Guinness Book of World Records, I believe.

Yeah that dog did win that title. But its apprently dead now. RIP Zombie dog

Hi!

Just thought id ask your advice on why im in so much pain but not in labour? Should i keep ringing the hospital telling them im in pain or just put up with it?

Cheers!

ps: my local hospital is quite shit and always send me home saying "Oh we dont know!" :S

At 11/4/09 03:16 PM, 1Tyla1 wrote: Gary Numan.

This thread is over. OVER.

Woo!! Numan rocks!!

Yup, my sis. She had her tits out in the daily star being called a lesbain. And mum says im the disappointment.

i agree with what someone else said, If you dont want it, give it up for adoption! Ive miscarried so far until march and its a miracle i have carried full term and due to give birth. the kid will at least have a nice life with someone who can afford to take care of them and love them. Honestly you need to learn to be more careful or get gf to have a better form of contraception like the Implant or coil.

And maybe you should sit down with your wife and have a BIG discussion about the whole pregnancy lark, cause for it to happen twice, you need to take a look at both your lifes.

Good luck.

You could always try these songs, i like this one, it would be a WTF!

oh dearie me!

At 11/1/09 04:41 PM, Blush wrote: This would be an excellent song for killing some ex boyfriends/girfriends.

THAT is the most awesome thing i have seen all day.

My husband is watching Ghost ship. Ive seen in tons of times, just cant be arsed doing fuck all.

At 10/30/09 08:11 PM, Curlyboy8 wrote: I just found a baby (ringtail?) possum in my backyard. I think it was dying, so I took it inside. Does anyone have any tips for how to nurse it back to health? What is it's diet? If I get a positive response, I might give you guys a picture of it.

put it in a box with air holes in it, with lots of blankets to keep it warm and stuff. And probably give it some milk and mashed up food that will help it. And just leave it alone and come and check on it every so often. Good luck!

At 10/30/09 07:58 PM, Frank-The-Hedgehog wrote:

FUCK YES YOU ARE THE BEST SCREENSAVER EVER.

i agree, though i feel soo old now! i totlally forgot about that, lost hours staring at it!

At 10/30/09 07:46 PM, Canas wrote: Chicks think uncut dicks are gross looking.

Pretty much the only thing that matters

I disaggre. I think my hubbys uncut dick looks pretty cute, like one of those wrinkly dogs. Nice and soft to stroke. I sit there for ages groping him. With my ex he was cut and to be honest it was ugly and look like some defromed mushroom when small.

My ex was cut and i found that shit and ugly.

My hubby on the other hand is uncut(or has a hat as i call it), and honeslty, sex is alot better, yeah it may get smelly quickly but FFS you can wash it cant ya??

I personally prefer uncut now, i enjoy playing with the foreskin, much to my husbands reaction of "WTF women?!"

i dont think it matters as long as you know how to use it and keep it clean.

oooh im mental..though i already knew that

You: you gave me crabs
Stranger: i'm sorry, i was just trying to get revenge, after all where do you think i got gonoria?
You: :o omg my womb is ruined!! how could you not say anything?
Stranger: i'm sorry, it was all a mistake
Stranger: will you marry me?
You: only if you buy me a ring with a big fuck of gem on it then yes
Stranger: yeah, what store would you like me to rob for your ring?
You: rob? i thought you had a job? You promised!! You said you would try
Stranger: i did! you know i had a drinking problem, i tried stopping...i really did, you have to try and understand its an addiction
You: i know, im just so disappointed, what will i tell our children? Poor bobbie wants his daddy home!
Stranger: i'm sorry, tell him that i love him, and that i'm trying
You: i will do. Come here and give us some loving!
Stranger: okay, i'll be home asap, by sunday at latest :)
You: okay hunnie buns! I must go tend to the children, see you soon xxx
Stranger: okay i love you xxxx
You have disconnected.

Sometimes they freak me out :S

Stranger: I love you
You: aww im sorry but we can never be
Stranger: OMG
Stranger: why not?
Stranger: AFTER ALL WE'VE BEEN THROUGH
You: im already married
Stranger: wtf
Stranger: I THOUGHT YOU LOVED ME
You: im sorry :( i do
Stranger: I THOUGHT WHAT WE HAD WAS SPECIAL
You: im sorry, i must leave now and kill myself
Stranger: omg
Stranger: i love you dont do that

Aww i think i may have really upset them. But our love can never be (hehehe)

Stranger: hello, lady, 47, need a man
You: hi lady, in labour, need a midwife RIGHT NOW
Stranger: I do not understand
You: i be giving birth, babys head is sticking out OMG!
Stranger: You Crazy????
You: no im in labour!!

HAHAHA. Dont worry im not in labour, i just couldnt resist! XD

At 10/30/09 04:28 PM, tuckerton296 wrote: newgrounds, in your opinion what is the best song to listen to while killing zombies. (in real life or in video games), mine is the final countdown.

Barbie girl by Aqua....LOL. XD

Nah it would have to be Mr self desrtuct by Nine Inch Nails!!

*mmm braiiinnss!*

At 10/30/09 04:06 PM, Psycho666 wrote:

Im gunna say its a bit of both. Still no need to act like an ass. Telling them its bad is enough. Not going "OMGZ YOU IS SHIT!"

<Shrugs> I was only mad that he actively advertised third party services that run up people's bills without a credit card and placed a vague legal threat to anyone wanting to use the game. That and the controls were really slow. too slow to become usable after 5 seconds.

oh, fair dos! But youre better reporting it to a mod(or whoever it is now that does it) about the Third party services than warning everyone yourself, i know youre trying to help but they are thr ones who can sort it.

At 10/30/09 03:58 PM, Psycho666 wrote: I'm just curious about something. I got a PM from the M-bot informing me that my review for that horrible game, prgm FUN, had been deleted!

I just want to know if it was because the game itself had made it to the obituaries, or was it because of how I reviewed it?

My review is still there in the obituary, so it is not deleted! I am confused, thats all. The dead game

Im gunna say its a bit of both. Still no need to act like an ass. Telling them its bad is enough. Not going "OMGZ YOU IS SHIT!"