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At 3/22/13 07:33 PM, FrozenFire wrote: She goes down on me like twice a day.

Because she's got shoddy internet connection?

hurr hurr I'm so witty

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  Ngvac Antr, Radio Show by KeepYourDistance

  DJ DeeJay listens to some WACKY CALLERZ talk about "the perfect night".

  Score

  5.00 / 5.00

  Type

  Voice

  Genre

  Comedy

  Popularity

  5 Views

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I'm entering.

:Oh yeah.

At 12/17/12 09:05 PM, Ragnarokia wrote: generally useless

Damn, that's harsh.

I don't see any cows around here, so where's all this beef coming from?

I'd LOVE to see a flash game on this.

Fresh copypasta

Someone has been on 4chan the past 30 minutes.

Wow. that wasn't so bad, I guess. I for one am happy with my score. :D

I guess next time I'll write an actual script to help me focus on acting and not on ad-libbing. I'll probably get a better mic and stuff too, to get rid of the background noise. A score of 105/150 or 70% is nice to hear but 23rd place out of 27 isn't really easy to swallow. :P

MY FIRST NG CONTEST. :D
other than the gem hunt, but you know what I mean. :Y

The deadline for judging is just around the corner!

I am afraid.

At 9 hours ago, JaShinYa wrote: Here's an updated list:
ENTRIES -without mine- O_O
Still 2 days left! Let's get it going slackers!

DUDE. Is mine in?

MyNG VAC Entry

I can't believe I've actually submitted something to NG other than Blog Posts, BBS posts and reviews! This is my first piece of media to be submitted to ANY portal, for reals!

meh.
the feeling's ok, I guess.

Emerald Dex Entry of Wobbuffet: "Usually docile, a WOBBUFFET strikes back ferociously if its black tail is attacked. It makes its lair in caves where it waits for nightfall."

Sapphire Dex Entry of Wobbuffet: "WOBBUFFET does nothing but endure attacks - it won't attack on its own. However, it won't endure an attack on its tail. When that happens, the POKéMON will try to take the foe with it using DESTINY BOND."

Black/White Dex Entry of Wobbuffet: "It desperately tries to keep its black tail hidden. It is said to be proof the tail hides a secret."

The secret is that Wobbuffet is the black tail, and the blue body is just a decoy. It's a defense mechanism.

Deino(one head) - Ein(german for one)
Zweilous(two heads) - Zwei(german for two)
Hydreigon(three heads) - Drei(german for three)

Magikarp is renowned for splash because according to Japanese folklore, a koi fish turns into a dragon after jumping over a waterfall. Magikarp use splash to jump into high waterfalls and come out as Gyarados.

A Dragonaire and a Dratini are eel-like, dragonic creatures called "Imoogi". They mature while waiting for a pearl(Dragonaire's) to drop from the sky and when they catch it they transform into a full-grown dragon.(Dragonite)

Also, for the sake of comedy...

When you beat Brock he gives you the TM "Bide".

Bide = Biden = Joe Biden
Brock = Barrack = Barack Obama

COINCIDENCE? I THINK NOT.

i think the new faces is a pretty cool guy, he's variety and cleaner and doesn't afraid of anything.

Also, this is my first BBS post since the redesign! Yay!

Crazy Dave

Alright, so technically it isn't.

Here's the deally-o:

Someone kidnaps you and you have abso-fucking-lutely no way to defend yourself. The kidnapper is somehow twice your size(or twice the size of the biggest guy you know, if you're a small motherfucker), fast as Usain Bolt, a master at all of the world's martial arts, and really fucking smart(like, uses geometry, trigonometry, etc. to calculate which angle he should kick you, and he calculates in the blink of an eye or less). This is just to make sure you can't escape.

He wants you to be part of his latest experiment and you have no choice but to oblige. The experiment is this; ALL of your physical attributes will become of the opposite sex, with the option of leaving your penis/vag untouched. The thing is, you will be patterned after an existing human being. Who do you want to be a PERFECT(or almost if you leave your genatalia) copy of, voice, face, body, metabolism and all?

(Also, if you choose to leave your willy or pussy alone, your genatalia will be diguised as the opposite sex's until you need to use it, and testosterone/estrogen/other hormones will not change anything like breast size hair growth, etc.)

I'd like to be Scarlett Johansson, then I'd proceed to look at myself all day and take racy pictures in private. I'd still want to get my dick sucked by chicks, so I'll leave my dick on.

What about you, mofo?

i'M sO fUCKING wITTY. :P

Hmm.... I wonder where you got that.

It's been too long for me to keep this inside, so I come here to pour it all out. Newgrounds, I come in search of a compassionate heart.

My little brother died last year, and I never even showed a hint of sorrow. Not a single tear was shed by me; this was, at least until now, when the pain became unbearable. I still remember the geeky little fucker, with his red hair and nasal voice. I remember how he rambled on with childlike enthusiasm about his various interests. His quirky behavior never got on my nerves because there was something sort of faintly amusing about him.

One day, he approached me and asked for advice on girls. He said there was this one special girl that he had laid his eyes upon, and he wanted me to help him earn her love. He showed me a picture of her, and at once I felt that she was out of his league. At first, I considered not helping him out, but my bro was lovestruck; he talked about her all day and night, so even if I felt that it was a lost cause, I relented.

Guys, you don't know how fast he proved me wrong; as I watched him from a distance, I found out that underneath his geeky exterior, there was a smooth and confident man. In just a few months, the girl had completely fallen in love with my little brother. Soon after they started going out, she asked him to prom. My brother was so excited for prom night, that he rushed me to a tuxedo rental.

We looked through all the tuxedos and tried to find the one that suited him most. Soon, we found a handsome, white tuxedo that just begged to be worn by my little bro on his prom night. He tried it on and asked me if he looked alright. My bro looked quite dashing in the tux, disregarding the fact that he wore glasses amd had freckles and curly red hair.

The night before prom, he took me to one side and told me that he wouldn't trade me for any other brother and that he could have never gotten this far without me. I told him that I wouldn't be able to come with him to the tuxedo rental in the morning because I had some stuff to do, so I offered him some money instead. He waved it off, saying that I've done enough. Up until now, Newgrounds, I wish that I hadn't let him go on his own.

The next day, I left early to go to work. Before leaving the house, I decided to check up on my little brother, to make sure nothing had happened to him before his special night arrived. As I peered into his room, I noticed that he was sleeping, so I left him the money if he needed it. I also left him a note, just in case he thought, it was somebody else's. After I scribbled down the note, I left.

Hours after leaving, I received a phone call; it was from my mom. She told me that my brother was at the hospital, in the morgue. At first I found myself full of disbelief. I rushed to the hospital and found mom and dad weeping at the lobby. Without hesitation, I begged the staff to let me see my brother. When they led me to him, I hoped that this was all a misunderstanding, and that it wasn't my brother at all.

My hopes were crushed as I stared at his body with gaping holes in him. The autopsy proved no consolation of a painless death as they told us he was skewered in several places which weren't the places he would have had to be skewered in to die instantly. I was crestfallen that my little brother who had worked so hard to make everything in his life go well was just left on the sidewalk to die a slow and painful death, just before the culmination of most of his efforts.

The staff told us that a man had come across him, already dead. The man had a few items with him that he thought might have been ours. He called 911 and they carefully loaded my brother into the ambulance when it had arrived and rushed him to the hospital to be cleaned up.

The mortician led me to the items that the man had left and I looked through them one by one. There was a skateboard, a paintbrush and some other things that didn't seem like they were ours. After looking for a while, I found my note, all dotted with blood. I folded it and took it home, as we left the hospital.

The funeral was dreadfully somber and all that could be heard was weeping and the priest's voice. I held all of my tears back. I tried to be strong for the ones that weren't. I tried to be strong for my dad who loved him so much, my mother who cared for him since he was a little baby, his girlfriend whom he had meant the world to, and all the others touched by his life. I spent the days staying strong for them and right now, I find myself unable to carry on my little charade.

As I type this, I look at the note my little brother had left me before he died, and I begin to cry. As I look at the words he wrote in reply I could imagine him smile while writing it down just before leaving the house. "Thanks for the money, bro. You're the best big brother a guy can ever have!" Newgrounds, I miss him, and I want him to know that.

You're the best little brother anyone could have. I'll never forget you, Chuck. Especially when you tried on your expensive, new Tux.

At 3/31/11 10:51 PM, yinyangman wrote: Um, April fools isn't until tomorrow. If you expect SMBZ episode 9 to come out tomorrow, do yourself a favor and DONT!!!

It is most likely a joke contrary to what Alvin Earthworm claimed on deviant art. So don't overload your hopes about it. Don't like SMBZ as much as I do? I don't care.

Lemme Guess.

When Boston Legal and Human were cancelled.

Meh.

It was pretty gay; the novel came across as a failed attempt at originality. The imagery distracted from the story too much, paying attention to details that shaped neither character nor the world they inhabited. As the chapters flew by, it began to seem more and more like the Frankenstein's monster of fiction. This wouldn't have been the case if the elements such as shamans and tesla rifles were used in such a way that it wouldn't make me want to tear my eyes out whenever I read the words shaman and tesla rifle in the same paragraph. I think what contributed to the gayness was the lack of harmony in the development of the world and the elements within it.

The characters and the concepts behind them were adorable. Even if some characters seemed completely boring and unnecessary, the other people seemed interesting enough to keep me reading. They really helped the story push forward and give the novel a sort of solid plot. I especially loved the names you gave them. Zeckle was one of my favorites, actually. They sound so unique without trying to wow the readers too much.

All in all, I guess it isn't bad; it's just gay. This is a good achievement for a 17 year old. Well done. I wouldn't be surprised if it becomes a hit; Twilight pulled it off too.

7/10

If the Chinese had continued technologically advancing itself as an empire, like it had been doing long ago, it would probably have enough shit to take over the world. The Chinese had boats around 3 times as big as European boats at one point in history. They also basically control Asian economy in the past.

If they continued going at the pace they were going, we would probably be under the Chinese by now. Imagine 3 times as much technological advancement of America. That could've been China.

COULD'VE. :D

At 10/7/10 10:35 AM, Ergox wrote: I believe your conscience is saying: "RAAAAAAAAAPE!!!"

Actually, it's chanting "B-D-S-M" Over and over.

Without the latex, leather, beating and shit. Just some humiliation. :D

So I have a girl right now and I love her to death. She loves me to the point of becoming a slave to my every command. Basically I've got her wrapped around my finger. She's no easy catch, mind you.

Anyways, there's this other girl who stirs up my emotions as well. The hunter's blood which runs in the family surges through my veins. I feel like I want to take her. To make her mine. I'm pretty sure she'll be easy; she's the only one who laughs when I make an unfunny remark about something; she keeps on sitting near me in class; she looks at me a lot, especially when she thinks I'm not looking. She's a little rowdy with her gal pals, but when interacting with me, she gets all quiet and plays with her arms and wrist in that manner where you see people in cartoons do when they're shy.

I just wanna know: Should I at least relieve myself by approaching the bitch and play with her psyche a little, or should I just shut up?

At 8/22/10 12:28 AM, Jedi-Master wrote:
You're still at least 10x smarter than most of the NG BBS community.

Ten multiplied to zero is still zero. :D

You're all idiots. Lucifer was the highest, if not a step higher than the seraphim; Satan was a cherub. After the fall of Lucifer, Satan took over.

Poor you.

GIMME A COLOR THAT STARTS WITH K!!!

What's your favorite color?
What's the color of your underwear?
WHAT'S THE COLOR OF YOUR FAVORITE UNDERWEAR?

At 5/16/10 10:41 AM, VinnyXY wrote:

At 5/16/10 10:30 AM, Chdonga wrote:

At 5/16/10 10:02 AM, VinnyXY wrote: Then who made God?
And I don't want to hear anyone say "He's God, He's been around forever." Don't give me that bullshit. Everything has to have a beginning including God.

But nothing doesn't?

Then who created nothing?

According to how you people describe God, I'd say God made the concept of nothingness; he DID create everything, right?

At 5/16/10 10:06 AM, pyromaniac616 wrote:

At 5/16/10 01:44 AM, Genocide wrote:

At 5/16/10 01:42 AM, chiefindomer wrote: You should probably look into abiogenesis.

I have, and it solves nothing. Sure, there was no life, but there were masses that were unliving that created life in abiogensis. What created those amino acids that set off that chemical reaction?

The amino acids are just very complicated mixtures of nitrogen, sulphur, etc..

It took an electric charge to get them to join though.

Never use that argument, Genocide. It's bullshit. Sure, it seems to work, but in the end, it just makes you look like a crappy debater who relies on a crutch argument that gets weaker by the second.

See what I did thar?

Read my last post for more information on your problem.

Good day.

At 5/16/10 08:11 AM, ArmouredGRIFFON wrote:
No with evolution everything must exist with it's necessary cause. This is possible, due to some theory of infinite regression or something now.

Applying that bit of philosophy, there would be no room for a God.

On the other hand, if we say there was something that needed no cause to exist, then we wouldn't be able to tell what it was, whether it be God, evolution etc. because they would all qualify to be that something.

amidoinitrite?

And I need a song to sing to her -RIGHT NOW, so I can't write- to remind her how I love her. It's thru voice chat btw. So yeah. Should be from a male singer, preferably RnB.