Agreed. I prefer Black.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZpdPTN4bm L0

At 5/18/09 01:26 AM, Cereal-Palsy wrote: YuckkkkBleugh(heebyjeebysseizure) fuck spiders man seriously

That pic always creeps me out. And pics of spiders in general especially close up or just the eyes. Actual spiders I have no problem with, but pics usually have good quality and yet they're still and I for some reason think the spider will randomly move and freak me out.

At 5/18/09 12:21 AM, Sensationalism wrote: -Feet or the thought being touched by feet

I find feet a bit wierd myself. They're all...feety or something. They are just a weird part of the body to me. Yeah, even considering all the other things we have and their functions...feet are just weird.

At 5/17/09 11:15 PM, WeHaveFreshCookies wrote: I'd hit it...

...that's what she said.

At 5/17/09 11:07 PM, WeHaveFreshCookies wrote: It's because they wanted to give you a disease. You're THAT ugly.

Isn't it obvious?

Is that to imply you think I don't have safe sex? Surely you jest lol. And have you seen my pics? I'm pretty damn good looking. I just don't boast...except for now...and the other posts...yeah.......sexy.

You have to take in factors about what your job would be, where you would be located, and want branch as well as whether you're enlisted or an officer.

Overall perks would be:
-paid
-paid leave
-housing allowance (once you're able to live off base)
- food allowance (same)
-clothing allowance (paid yearly on the anniversary of enlistment...not sure officers get this)
-major health and insurance benefits
- family/dependency benefits as far as child care, health, dentall, etc
-don't decide what you wear to work?
-ability to change jobs with the same job security while you transition.

I'd say talk to a recruiter for a particular branch more and they could break it down more in depth. Even within branches there is still the difference between active duty, guard, and reserve benefits.

At 5/17/09 10:57 PM, Achilles2 wrote: I've been rated a 7-9 on a scale of 1-10 whenever I ask. Though that still doesn't convince me.

I've gotten random vagina from attractive women without paying on several occasions. ...only reason I'm convinced.

I actually am pretty attractive as far as guys go around here. Not conceited, just convinced.

I have to ask "Really?" on everyone's choices. Has no one seen Street Fighter? The first one. Heard Postal was bad too.

Have a Happy Birthday.

At 5/15/09 03:41 PM, lolomfgisuck wrote: Look at this thread, for example. There's nothing bad about it... sure, it's not the most insiteful thing I've ever read... but it's not pointlessly rude or offensive... it's an open inventation to creative responses and maybe, just maybe, we'll get a laugh or two out of it.

But no, we won't... because before anyone had a chance to respond, it was locked... and there's a good chance that the user who created it, was banned. But for what? What about that thread deserves punishment?

Well I'm gonna agree with the mod on that one. The thread was just...wack. Had potential, but on the part of the user in my opinion. Where was the clever pic? If you're gonna just have a cynical remark well I'm gonna need more depth or substance behind the matter.

So had it been let go...where would it have gone. Yeah, it was locked so we don't know exactly but educated guess, which I'm sure is what the mod did, it would have just been a bunch of random shit and sayings. The topic didn't say "Hey post whatever they hell you have to say" ...uh...general section? So what would be the point of there thread?

Had the user maybe gone into a little more detail...then it could be wack, but at least have a subject to stay on the topic of. The thread had no limits. Literally anything could follow that statement and another educated guess seeing the type of crap around here that most likely what other users would have done.

Comedy is strict, but structure or foundation in almost anything is needed. That basically was just a brick. Things that are often funny are because they fall into some category that people relate to and laugh or even if it is offensive or rude it either is close to being that way, on the verge of...which makes it funny, or just completely exaggerated.

As far as bans go, I agree they're stupid. Alt accounts are against the rules but who cares? Make one anyway... worst case scenario, you don't make an alt and you just can't post for a few days. It's not a big deal. Or is it? I post at work... I do my job but I have a lot of free time and the day goes by really slow when I don't have the option to log in to the NG forums for some good laughs throughout the day. There's always a consequence to every action and it's silly for Mods to happily garner the mentality that bans don't effect anyone... the idea that "It's just the internet" works both ways... not being able to post isn't the end of the world, but it's not fun either. On the other hand, because it's just the internet, letting a topic like the above example doesn't hurt anyone either... so why not opt for the option that lets the most amount of people have fun? Don't be so egar to ban, let silly topics ride for a few and see where they end up. At least give us a chance to have fun...

Well...first off... forgive me if you're at a place getting paid and life sucks so much cause you don't have anything to do at work...while you're still getting paid...and some people can't get a job...or are homeless...starving...etc. Cause getting money for getting on Newgrounds isn't awesome.

Secondly, find something else to fucking do. Yeah, I'm not saying a ban is all peachy either, but you said it several times. It's the internet. You know how much shit is on the internet? I can answer for you...no. So find out. In case you try and turn that on me with this topic, I'm asked if others felt the same about different aspects of the forum. I'm very aware I could find something else to do. I topic isn't that the forums suck and I have nothing better to do.

So explore... Or just don't get banned.

At 5/14/09 09:14 PM, Sheizenhammer wrote: I may just be expressing foolish optimism here, but given the fact that, as an internet community, there's really no limit on how long it can last for, a time when it becomes genuinely interesting and fun is (in my opinion) likely to happen again eventually.

Not at all. I agree on this matter too. I know that we get out of it what we put into it and that everyday is gonna have its ups and downs. It's probably my own damn fault for dipping in and out for so long. I just happen to come back at the downs.

Failing that, there's always trying to start some better topics yourself. If only I could think of some...

Exactly lol. I was hesitant on making this for coming across as "wah wah wah...forums suck...I want things to be like they were...noobs...wah."

I'm glad to be getting the feedback though.

At 5/14/09 09:40 PM, StephanosGnomon wrote: The forum is uh, in the eye of the beholder. Or something.

True indeed. Guess it's just the stubborn side of me not wanting to let go. I've shopped around and gone other places, but I just wasn't feeling the variety of users or what the site offered. Not that they were bad just wasn't my cup of tea.

Never really been a forum person til I started posting on the BBS. I thought they were dumb. Just a bunch of people arguing and there is like a forum for every damn thing and I still wonder like "are people logging into this forum on cheesecake recipes to talk that frequently...and they have different sections!"

But the BBS was like the first and still really only one I liked to this day and as such I've missed what a forum is...to me in my mind. Because those "glory days" is what made me interested in it and love it as much as I did. So I guess it is partly or probably even mostly me dealing with the fact of that time has come and gone.

Like getting over toys...if you do lol. At the time I thought how could I ever stop playing with toys. They're awesome. Then you grow and give up them up, but maybe hold on to your favorite one. And every once in awhile you find it, take it out and look at it. You know it was your favorite. You remember all the fun you had. But you just can't bring that feeling back. The toy hasn't changed. It looks the same. Feels the same. Is the same, but it's just a little sad that you're holding what was the main reason for your joy...but now they're is nothing. It's not doing anything for you and probably won't.

...wow. I was kinda deep right then. lol. That was a great analogy. Pat on the back. haha.

At 5/14/09 10:09 PM, gumOnShoe wrote: I forgot I had a sig, and I really miss yours. I remember when it blinked at me the first time and I was so engrossed with watching and waiting for it to happen again or just trying to figure out if it actually had blinked at me.

Lol it was indeed awesome. I still have it, but I think if memory serves me correctly the sigs can't be animated now. I looked like a year ago or something. I'd put up the still one, but...yeah just wouldn't be the same. I used to get that all the time, "Man does your sig blink...freaky." Awesomeness.

Anyway, its cool to see you're back, even if its only for a short time. I think I told you a long time ago that it was you who helped push me towards being a different kind of user, a better one in my opinion, with a thread similar to this that was about music and how people should realize other people had opinions and respect them. I don't know what it was, I always knew that, but I had previous to that moment used the bbs just to express my opinion instead of reading and discussing other people's positions.

Wow. I'm honored. Truly. Yeah, I just enjoy sharing thoughts. Even if I don't agree. I wondered sometimes if people would see me as always debating or argumentative when I really I just enjoy a good conversation. Especially if the other person doesn't agree with me. I'm not trying to win them over when I talk. I just like to keep elaborating or putting different thoughts/ideas/scenarios so that I can either learn more about where they're coming from or get a better grasp on it. I find those types of conversations interesting.

In respect to the original post, I think its us. We grow up. We get jaded for various reasons. And then we realize all the people we used to interact with when we first started here have drifted off and done their own thing. I mean, I can just name the names of people I used to interact with a lot more than I do now (and some are still here):

Minion777 (who I once considered my n00b equal since we started at about the same time)
Andersson (still around somewhere)

I remember them very well.

TigerKitty

I talked to her last year. She went to England if memory serves me correct. Got engaged, I'm sure married by now. Yeah, I miss her...

MickTheChampion

Remembered

Earfetish

Remembered

Ozcar

...will always know that name.

MystWilliams

Man what happened to that dude?

I'm not too upset by anything, I just keep on chugging. My only regret is that once you "cross" over into "modom" it becomes harder to deal with regs & n00bs because you're automatically right, an arbiter of some sort of justice, or just plain unapproachable. Some of its me, being worn out from being sucked up to whenever someone new contacts me, and part of its everyone else.

I'm sure that can put a strain on you. Weeding out the dick suckers from the cool people would suck. And then the scared ones...well new users are pussies. No offense to new users...but you're still pussies.

Again meh.
I'll just keep posting.

Right on. Fight the good fight.

At 5/14/09 10:14 PM, Ozcar wrote: I love everyone... Don't be sad, everything will be fine :)
<3

You have a kid? When was that? Congrats! and yeah I'm sure it'll all work itself out again in time. I just probably won't see it.

At 5/15/09 02:08 PM, DarkSytze wrote: the regulars of the forum somewhat changed their imago during the years. i remember some regulars now that used to be the same, gray mice in the midst of 0x users. for instance, when people were picking on 07 users are a generation of shitty users, 07 regular posters now have some status within the community. in the midst of shitty users good users will rise. it's a routine in a way, some of the regulars that have been coming to Newgrounds for years have done experience with fads in the past. inside jokes that only some users will understand. we change our image thanks to the past we experienced on Newgrounds. we do kind of strife for recognition in the community, regulars has done their e-smarts on NG territory good that way.

Very true. We change with the times I guess. Just wish the "legacy" if you will passed on instead having to be started a new. There should be like a Hall of fame or something. With people inducted and voted in. I'd create myself on like a site...but yeah I'm lazy, more busy than lazy, but still lazy.

At 5/15/09 02:31 PM, HellboundNinja wrote: it feels that way cause we dont knwo as many as we used to so we dont know who the good new posters are and what not

Yeah, but it's hard to want to get to know them because they all look funny...and smell.

At 5/14/09 07:55 PM, Phobotech wrote: Then again, hindsight is 20/20...we remember all of the funny instances throughout the BBS clearly back then, which presents the illusion that they came one after another, but they were, in reality, far and few between.

I mean, there was a shit-ton of NOTHING worthy of mentioning before Dick Neck came along...how much longer until the next hilarious moment of BBSery?

Yeah it's possible to just be remembering a certain way, damn I'm sure convincing then cause I could swear it was laugh after laugh with only like a day or two lapse inbetween. Or maybe not a laugh but just something really interesting at least.

At 5/14/09 07:56 PM, gumOnShoe wrote: Anyways, we let that photoshop topic go even when we knew it was just an alt who had googled for an image of a long neck. I don't know why people get so freaked out anymore. All I do anymore is run a writing contest and occasionally ban people for short off topic insipid posts like "I didn't read the topic" or "You're just a fag."

Meh

Feel ya. Definitely like the sig there. Congrats on the modship too.

At 5/14/09 07:41 PM, Phobotech wrote: Because every once and a while, shit like this serve as a reminder to how much better your life really is.

Lol yeah, and back then would come the good parody of that thread either in the form of someone disfiguring the pic or making a topic like it that was witty and humorous.

Which of course lead to the lame parody someone else tried to create and at least two more after that in which the people would get banned. The photoshop this guy thread, and the clever sig someone would come up with using the pic and something actually funny to say in which people jumped on the bandwagon and made their own.

We all have a good laugh for 3 days to a week until the next great thing comes. And didn't usually have to wait long. That's when it was golden.

At 5/14/09 06:38 PM, Rabid-Echidna wrote: I recall thinking you were a cool guy, so I'll assume we either agreed on things or you managed to debate the other side of the argument rationally instead of pulling a cellardoor6. Half of the time I feel like some sort of old-fashioned comedian and the only time I ever even make topics anymore is so that people can wonder who the hell this random level 42 guy with over 13,000 posts is that they've never seen before and why he's spewing out a bunch of ridiculous bullshit.

Ya see like that! I miss the elaborate fads or catchy things people had going. The inside jokes. It could be something only the Mods really understood that came about in their forum and someone made a topic about it. Some jumped on the bandwagon pretending to know, some just wanted to know, others of us were just like what the fuck but found humor in it. It was all good.

I generally don't respect people who resort to the Bill O'Reilly form of debate. I'd rather talk with someone than talk at them, and two people yelling their opinions over one another is best reserved for the lead up to a bar fight. The whole e-persona thing is ridiculous to begin with, it's not like you're going to impress anyone by being an internet badass besides yourself and the dumbass who responds to your post with "I agree." This is supposed to be a place for, you know, DISCUSSION. I can't claim to have had more than one or two decent ones over the past few years. Partly due to inactivity, mostly to lack of substance in the framework.

Yeah everyone wants to be "internet cool." And I can sympathize for some because it may mean a lot to them and this is the only place or one of the places they get that self satisfaction. But I'd have to be like those motivation posters and say "they're doing it wrong." Cause their lame stories, terrible jokes, half ass humor isn't getting it.

We should hang out and reminisce some time. Remember Mast3rmind? Oh man, those were the days...

Yeah, I remember him! Ah man I wonder how he is. Those were the days. *tear*

At 5/14/09 06:30 PM, DroopyA wrote: But it's all changed now... if you make a funny random remark, it's considered spam and you're booted from the forum. Making unfunny topics results in the same thing and this hurts creatvity on a whole because every post you make is clouded in a fear of being baned. Even when people work up the never to make random topics, there's not enough ballsy people to reply for fear of getting banned simply for posting in a 'spam' topic.

The end result is a bunch of scared people having the same handful of safe conversations over and over and over again.

Bigbadron started it, Ozcar drove it into the ground, and Zeroks "i'm a perfect little goody two-shoes" attitude enforces it. We need mods that know how to have fun... not mods that think that they have to run this place with an iron fist or it'll implode. It's just the internet, no harm comes from a topic about peeing in somebodies butt... regardless of how stupid and immaure it may be.

I could say that's the fault of the users as well. They need to man up and get some fucking balls then. I'm not telling people to act stupid or disrespectful, but I'll put it this way.

Back in the day, rules still applied and people found that border they teetered on and still found a way. Sometimes it was a hit and sometimes they got banned. That's the game. They choose to play they follow the rules. Everyone loves a laugh and as such if it was overly disrespectful to anyone here, or racist, demeaning, or violating something over the top...etc, it always seemed it just kinda was let slide. And if it was just stupid, you couldn't post some days and we'd make fun of you when you came back.

Like being suspended from school for like fighting. You decided to AND you lost so double shame for the person. They stayed home and then we're like"So how was that ass beating?" when they come back.

These new users act like a ban is death. Yeah, they shouldn't want to be banned or try by any means to, but that just shows their dependency on what? These topics. Nazi armbands in the fucking closest, Teacher pwn, and penis torture?

Excuse the hell out of me...no offense to anyone, but what is a ban to me? I get banned and I probably wouldn't even know except for this topic cause I'm replying to you all. I do more reading...not that there's much to look at...then posting anyway. If someone gets banned they should take the lesson from it, move on, and find something productive or counterproductive to do. That's what we did. Not that it happened a lot, but I was banned for posting in stupid topics, flame wars, etc and didn't lose stride. You go" yeah that was dumb on my. they called me on that one. Touche." or "well that's bullshit" and do something else. Not anxiously pass time waiting for it to be lifted.

But before even all this they have to stop being retarded and understand comedy. The audience they're going for and the audience actually recieving the joke. Something they may think is funny isn't necessarily funny to everyone or even the majority. I believe that is what people had going for them then. They picked and chose their battles instead of "This makes ME laugh so i'm gonna share it with everyone else."

Wow...even "Rap sucks" threads are watered down now.

However i was surprisingly shocked at how not all the first 5 posts were something to the effect of "yeah rap sucks, rap is crap, etc."

At 5/14/09 05:48 PM, Rabid-Echidna wrote: A year ago I was coming here out of habit alone, now it's at the level where I occasionally check the forums every few days to see if there's anything worth reading. This periodic checkup is usually without positive result, so I imagine that this remnant of an old habit will soon enough die out for good. Just about everyone I knew on NG is gone and not coming back save for about three people, so instead I read and post on SomethingAwful because they actually have content and intelligent discussion on their forums.

Yeah I disappear for an extended amount of time and then find myself checking in again. I'm actually almost afraid I'll feel the same and just...leave. I don't want to though. I don't even know why. Habit? maybe as well, but I guess somewhere inside me hopes it's a little more to it than that.

And seeing you brings up another point. Not like we were enemies or anything at all, but I believe I remember debating with you in I don't know how many threads. Actual intellectual debate and not stupid comebacks or name calling or smart ass remarks. I don't know if we even agreed on a lot, but the point I can recognize you years later and feel good about seeing you says a lot about then.

Users now...not that we didn't have them then...want to kill each other cause someone likes Straight Edge music etc and are pretty verbal about it. I doubt these same users will see those people in years and have the same feelings. They don't talk. Everything is a competition with their opinions that they feel they have to "win." It's not about explaining their view so the other person understands and sharing opinions. Most often it's trying to convince the other person they're wrong.

...and good to see ya man. :-)

At 5/14/09 05:53 PM, HeartbreakHoldout wrote: Why do I stick around? Recognition I guess. I've never been popular on here, so it would feel like a waste of time if I just faded into obscurity without even trying.

That I can completely understand and you're more than entitled to that. For newer users I feel that is the main reason they come. Which then I hold a double standard. Someone having been here and staying for that reason I'm cool with, but I like hold a grudge against those newer ones that come for that reason.

I know it makes me a hypocrite and I actually try to deal, but I don't like it and can't put my finger on why I can't just let it go. It's like they could be going through a lot in their own lives and this is their relief. Even if they come act childish or ignorant, it may be their one thing that may literally let them get through another day.

Still I just have some selfish feelings finding myself wanting to...i don't know...keep they "sanctity" of this place.

That and the fact I can't leave. I'm pretty much addicted to this place, regardless of what becomes of it. As long as there are still some names I recognise, and some of the same basic people in charge, I'll feel at home on here.

I feel you there. Another reason I keep coming back.

I do find, alot more now, that when I make a thread, there are alot more really new users that I don't recognise at all, but that could just be xenophobia due to being here for so long, and losing touch with the youngsters.

Yeah I feel like I have the old man syndrome a lot here.

It does give me a nice feeling to see people I do recognise though. Like you. I never knew you, but I remember you winning the most underrated thing a while back.

Well, thanks I appreciate that.

At 5/14/09 05:59 PM, HotActionYiffFur wrote: I like talking to people, even if the majority of you are fucking retarded.

Wow you're still here?

At 5/14/09 06:05 PM, Luxury-Yacht wrote: I've been here longer than I can remember, trapped inside this computer.

I don't know if the machine will ever let me leave this place

Remember you too.

It's been a while since I actually made a topic. Wow.

Anyway, I noticed Evark's topic from way back basically talking about the decline of the forum, threads, posts etc and had a thought?

Is it really that things have degraded or are we just more mature, wiser, or just plain bored in some cases. Don't get me wrong I do believe there are a lot of dumb shits and immature little fucks that just have complete nonsense going on here.

But think about it. How long have some of us been here? And in that time how much have we seen? Originality isn't completely dead, but I dare say we saw some of the best pranks, debates, flames, controversial moments, etc. If anything users now may have a watered down version of our been there, done that, got the t-shirt age. Not like it's been eons or centuries, but maybe all the good stuff came and left.

I know the question has been posed many times, "Why do you keep coming back...or even stay?" Hell, I can't even answer that for myself. Maybe it's the hope of it being once like was? Of course I like to see how things change and that things do change and progress. I also like see old faces...or names and posts as the case may be. Not even necessarily that I knew or really talked to the person, but a feeling of "Hey! I remember that guy...what a dumbass, or he was and now man has he changed...or they're a mod now...what!?" etc.

It could be that in our "time" other users that had bee around said the same thing about us. Could just be a cycle with ups and downs. I've started typing and I'm getting lost as to where I'm trying to even go with this. Got a head full of ideas and questions all at the same time.

But I guess just as in life I find myself wondering why are we here...on the forum? Why do we keep coming back? What made it so great before? What is it I even want out of it now? Was it really even as great before as I make it out to be in my mind? Have all the really good ideas and topics or at least the greatest ones happened and will I just have to settle for less?

Is it the forum...or is it just...us?

I just wonder if others out there share the same sentiments.

At 4/28/09 10:36 PM, MilestoneRazor wrote: About time this was made.

Was made two years ago. ...and sadly still holds true.

At 5/14/09 03:03 PM, simon wrote: I knew it was bullshit when I saw Robin, the director said he will NOT be using Robin in the next-generation Batman movies, EVER.

Not really. What the director said was that he could really forsee a Robin in these movies as he's already portraying a young Batman starting out and Robin isn't until sometime later. The possibility of a Dick Grayson being in a movie is likely. Just not suit and cape.

At 5/14/09 03:09 PM, Silent-G wrote: I don't see Robin being in this type of Batman movie, but maybe a Nightwing type sidekick.

Well I don't think they'd jump completely out of continuity with that. I'd hope not at least. For that to happen he'd definitely have to be Robin first and then they would have to develop the conflict between Robin wanting to get out of the shadow of Batman. I doubt they'd do that in one movie and if so shame on them cause it'll just suck. or at least not be as good in my opinion cause of trying to put too much in one movie *cough*Spiderman 3*/cough*

And while I don't think they should try to cast a new Joker, they should make it apparent that he's still alive and fucking with Batman. Like randomly at really crucial parts in the movie an explosion should go off right near Batman knocking him down for a minute, and when he looks down he sees a joker card, stuff like that.

Good idea. A bit cliche though. I think he'll live on regardless in people's eyes in the movies. They may reference him though like in conversation.

At 5/14/09 01:58 PM, Kain-Ceverus wrote: Talking... to fish...

.......yeah......again.

That's a terrible name. Rumor has it of trying to get Shia Lebouf to play a pre robin. Don't think he'll be sporting tights though. And I highly doubt they'll replace the joker or even have him in another movie.

At 5/8/09 09:40 PM, Straight-Edge wrote: The ability to fly in the opposite direction you want to go in

.........yeah.

At 5/13/09 09:42 PM, MercatorMap wrote: Contrary to popular belief, being in a warzone does not get you promoted faster.

But you do get more ribbons which I'll have the later part of this year once I return hooyah!

Air Force bitches!

At 5/13/09 03:40 PM, Glowstick-warroir wrote: The diffrence is when you use a number. you don't drink 5 beer. you dirnk 5 beers. it's because beer means both a bottle of beer, and the liquid it's self.

we do it with like all beverages (though, like you don't call your cow beef, and beef cow. "I'm going to eat some cow tonight" dosn't seem right)

Of course when a number is thrown in you would use "beers" because you are saying the specific quantity and would have to say beers to be grammatically correct.

But when referencing the product or liquid it is funny how either could be used.

At 5/13/09 04:06 PM, Victory wrote: People are not defined by what they are not, or what they do not believe in. That's ridiculous.

I'd have to disagree. What you aren't could be just as much a factor as what you are. In most cases they go hand in hand. To say you "are" something in somecases implies you "aren't" something else. The same goes vice versa.

Now of course this doesn't apply to any and everything. A doesn't always equal B, but in some cases can. I could say I breathe oxygen which is to imply I don't breathe other gases. The same could go for your arguement. If you were to claim atheism then that is to say I figure you don't believe in "gods" or deities in general, not just a Christian God and I breathe oxygen and the statement isn't saying, "but I also breathe helium and nitrogen on occasion."

Yeah first time I gave was my junior year of high school. Everyone did. A lot of different feelings went into it for everyone. But we all agreed....we just wanted to be able to get out of class for an hour and a half.

But people were excited, felt they were really doing something positive, nervous, scared, etc. In the end everyone felt good about it and did it the next year all with the good intentions of helping out. It wasn't as big of thing for those that were nervous or scared, but you know some people just don't like needles, others just felt like they were contributing something in their own little way.

If space is indeed infinite I don't believe that means planets can't be finite. I believe life and all things matter to be finite as well. Yeah, could be wrong, but I don't believe just because space can't be measured that it trickles down into all smaller things within it.

It was written more as one would fantasize and with the intent of turning others on as opposed to a linear story. It would seem to me that if it were real some unnecessary adjectives wouldn't have been used (hot, throbbing, juicy, etc). When people usually tell a story, even those that add unnecessary details or elaborate on things irrelevant to the story, they don't use imagery in the way that makes you live it rather than they just get the point across.

or maybe she can just write. Doubt it though.