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At 5/5/14 10:02 PM, CiviLies wrote: Oh. Lol. This huge-ass message and of course I manage to effiddup

At 5/5/14 09:58 PM, CiviLies wrote: Personal experience, huh...? Well, I'm still shy and awkward, but not as much as I used to be. I've also developed more confidence than I used to have. I accomplished this mostly by guts; I'd just walk up to people and try to start a conversation.

tl;dr version

This was supposed to say, "tl;dr version below, near bottom of page"

Sorry for the double-post, guys.

Being a weirdo is not always a bad thing actually. All talented and successful people are weirdos to some extent.
My case is, as I find it, is also quite unusual (lol we weirdos always believe that we are unique). Despite of my somatic expressions of mental anxiety and fear, I can be extremly confident sometimes. Once I was so completely sure that I am not going to pass any exam of the discipline I studied at uni.. that I passed all exams with highrst grades lol.. I can be quite talkative and social when I feel like it and lots of people said that they loved me and enjoyed spending time with me.
But my deluded mind always try to show the fake and miserable reality.. it sucks... Despite of the fact that everything is just more than great I feel miserable at times.. Despite of the fact that the people that love me are around I can be scared of them.. It's some sort of paranoia..

So probably everything is much easier.. Deluded mind doesn't let me see the ultimate reality..

Far beyond illusive powers there is great emptiness..

At 5/5/14 10:02 PM, CiviLies wrote: Oh. Lol. This huge-ass message and of course I manage to effiddup

At 5/5/14 09:58 PM, CiviLies wrote: Personal experience, huh...? Well, I'm still shy and awkward, but not as much as I used to be. I've also developed more confidence than I used to have. I accomplished this mostly by guts; I'd just walk up to people and try to start a conversation.

tl;dr version

This was supposed to say, "tl;dr version below, near bottom of page"

Sorry for the double-post, guys.

Thank you for such a sincere reply.. It's not just beneficial for people who seek for this sort of assistance.. but you'll find that what you wrote and posted here will help you, yourself more than anyone else. By translating your own thoughts into words you find out more about yourself and it will definately help you..

Stay awesome, kind and intellegent! :)

At 5/5/14 04:06 PM, CiviLies wrote: Dude, get some help...
The worst I suffered from was mild social anxiety around strangers and other people. And Mild is probably pushing--it was never bad enough that I was to be diagnosed with anything. I was just shy, awkward, and timid, really. If it's this bad, then seek a professional. You won't be able to function properly in society if you can hardly say "Hi" to anyone without throwing up.

the first adequate reply, thx.. some useful tips from your personal experience would be appreciated.

At 5/5/14 01:20 PM, Richard wrote: Anxiety and panic disorder are not the same thing.

/ = or

At 5/5/14 03:41 AM, SithCorduroy wrote: I don't know, sir.

Dude is a nice fellow. He's calm, tranquille. He doesn't react too much on external conditions. Whereas he is not a selfish bastards who cares only about himself. There is something we can learn from him.

Tobacco (its active compund - nicotine) - is the most useless, stupidest and annoying drug ever! It has no benefits except of slight and fast lasting intoxication with the first cig in the morning and sore throat after other ones..

I have been smoking for quite a long time.. this is SHIT! bloody tobacco companies.. what a bunch of greedy bastards....
I will be happy if it gets banned completely..

At 5/5/14 03:36 AM, Wegra wrote: Discuss

a human is an obstacle that we need to overcome..

I am. And it's incredible!

When it comes to sitting with lots of people in the silence in one room my whole bloody digestive system just go terrrebly insane!

My stomach growls loudly and bowels sound like there is an alien inside of me who wants to break free..
Normally when I am by myself (even when hungry) my guts are calm and happy.

As I understood it's an overactivated by stress brain that overstimulates whole gut system, thus leading to the symptoms described above.

Am I allergic to people? Or should I take a shit in front of these bastards around me to get rid of my fear?

Psychologists of Newgrounds... HELP!!

At 1/26/14 10:44 AM, Ericho wrote:

At 9/1/12 12:28 PM, Fluttershy wrote: Fuck off and die from lack of protein. It's possible because u no eat meat.

Vegetarians do in fact get enough protein. They just get it from peanuts, I think. Have you noticed that on a list of the most disgusting foods ever made, almost all of them are meat? Just saying.

They can not get two essential amino acids from vegetarian meals. These are Lysine and Tryptophan. They must be ingested by a human to maintain vital processes in body.

I lol at you vegan eaters ! xD

At 12/12/13 11:29 PM, Viper50 wrote:

At 12/12/13 11:17 PM, greatname wrote: Ambient and IDM don't have a well defined style.

Quick question.
Whats your opinion on Burzum? And by that I mean their predominately Ambient and Electronic related stuff.
That would include
Sôl austan, Mâni vestan
Hliðskjálf
Dauði Baldrs

lol sorry. It's quite dark so I can not clearly see my keyboard. I meant "the works of Aphex Twin".

For example:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h-9UvrLyj3k

and

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=goDd02TTxBA

At 12/12/13 11:29 PM, Viper50 wrote:

At 12/12/13 11:17 PM, greatname wrote: Ambient and IDM don't have a well defined style.

Quick question.
Whats your opinion on Burzum? And by that I mean their predominately Ambient and Electronic related stuff.
That would include
Sôl austan, Mâni vestan
Hliðskjálf
Dauði Baldrs

Yep these ones definately have gothic/medievil/fantasy style/atmosphere/ambience.
But as a genre Ambient is actually very wide to define its particular style. For example the worls of Aphes Twin (primary IDM musician) vary greatly one from another.

At 12/12/13 04:05 PM, MadFedora wrote: www.bbspot.com/news/2008/12/linux-on-a-potato.html

I was almost choked from laughing. A group of Dutchmen hackers successfully ran a famous Linux distro Damn Small Linux (DSL) on a potato, the whole distro is with the size of about 50 MB. Ofc, with some modification as they wrote custom CPU and use memories plugged into a flash drive. They were able to edit a text file with legendary UNIX text editor, VI.

I hope this is not some troll shit.

Potato systems Ipad on carrots and cell phones made of celery. What a crative way of creating vegegadgets!

At 12/12/13 11:12 PM, DarkMatter wrote: FUCK ALL YOU HIPPIES!

just kidding I like a lot of stuff and I'm terrible with names

we are neither hippies nor hipsters. Ambient and IDM don't have a well defined style.
so we are some sort of freaks but we don't do drugs or wear funny hats on weird hairstyles :)

At 12/12/13 11:08 PM, DarkMatter wrote: Because we are animals with frontal lobes.

good point. From scientific and physiologic points of view you are right. But lets not forget that there is a spiritual side of a human life. And natives of America were saying that spirituality is of the primary role in the life of a human.

At 12/12/13 08:27 PM, LazyDrunk wrote: What's so great about hate?

When I hate something, 95% of my efforts go into either coping with dissatisfaction, or articulating somehow (usually in a malicious way) that my nuts itch and when it comes scratching time, everybody gets a whiff.

Why does it feel so right when we're taught it's oh so wrong?

It's much a better way to be calm in every situation and do not let anger or anything distrup the calmness of your mind. If you learn how to do this, your whole life would change. By being less reactive I don't mean being dead like a zombie. But calm and tranquil, free of any sort of anxiety, annoying fears etc..

At 12/12/13 10:55 PM, yurgenburgen wrote: I have their Hi Scores and Trans Canada Highway EPs
they are pretty good

That's cool! So they are more famous than I supposed.

BoC = Boards of Canada - ambient/IDM band composed of two scottish brothers Marcus and Michael.
Sample: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XjzF_3sNqms

I can not describe what does this music mean for me.. It's unbelievable.

I do not really care why.. but I was wondering why so many people prefere to listen to nowaday's pop crap like miley cyrus (I even feel terrible to write her name with capital letters)..

By the way has anyone heard of Tommy LM. He has a profile here but the last time he was active on NG was a loong time ago..

Thanks fellows!

At 7/31/12 01:03 AM, FallenMartyr wrote: I went through this phase too...

One day you will look back on how foolish you are now, well maybe.

Ok, so what do you suugest me to do, good sir?
I see you have some experience.

But don't forget about the fact that we must do some silly things in this life and learn on our own mistakes.
I want my life to be full of feelings. I hate this kind of boring life like: get a job, marry a woman which will give a birth of two small humans, then you move to Alabama state and buy a house there, then doctor says you have a malignant tumor, you die.. La Finita!

At 7/30/12 11:06 PM, CockGobbler wrote: One thing to date a girl in another province/state, another thing to date someone in another country, but another CONTINENT? Sorry to bust your balls bro but this ain't gonna work.
Pic related: It's you for trying to make this work

Yes, its definately me on the pic, moving to the airport with a ticket in the hand :)
She's living in the North of Syberia, so I have to come to Moscow, then 4 hours from Moscow by the plane again to her city.

No guys she's not "guy" or "gay guy" or "guy guy". Stop being fuckin' obvious. She has a lot of photos and she added dozens of them during few last month. If it's so common to meet a guy insted of a girl in USA, well its a problem of this country.. In Russia its very rare.

Why we decided not to talk via skype? 'cause we want to save our desire to meet each other and to hear the voices for the first time.

Omnis Amans Omens - all people who are in love are crazy..

At 7/30/12 02:14 PM, Amaranthus wrote:

At 7/30/12 02:13 PM, greatname wrote:

At 7/30/12 02:11 PM, Boomstick wrote: Run, it's a guy. He wants your tight unbreached asshole.

She has a lot of photos and I know a lot of her friends online.
You know in Russia female population is bigger than male one, so there is not so much chance that she's a guy

Have you seen Russian females?
They're manly, dude.

I've moved to USA, before it I was livin' in Russia. So believe me they are the most beautiful females on Earth

At 7/30/12 02:11 PM, Boomstick wrote: Run, it's a guy. He wants your tight unbreached asshole.

She has a lot of photos and I know a lot of her friends online.
You know in Russia female population is bigger than male one, so there is not so much chance that she's a guy

At 7/30/12 02:08 PM, Amaranthus wrote: Rape her.

by pushing my virtual penis into her virtual vagina on chat?

So I've been chattin' with her for 1 year literally every day..
even when we were eating we were typing.
we decided not to talk on skype, so our meeting will be an unforgettable one.. Some day we will hear the voices of each other and this will be more than a shock

We are living veerey far away from other. She is from one small syberian city in Russia, I am from USA.

What to do, what to do - is what I'm asking you, comrades

This 83-year old gentelman from London city
http://tommylm.newgrounds.com/

The guy who participated in creation of Fancy pants adventures: world 2
Morover he is the authour of some great masterpieces.

ahahahah guys, thaaanks!

At 5/17/12 01:07 PM, Joel-Gruesome wrote: I'm assuming you're in a different time zone, if not you got some problems.

I'm in a comepletly fuckin' different time zone! ahah It seems to me that you folks have fuckin' never been drunk?

At 5/17/12 01:04 PM, Master-of-pancakes wrote: Hit on someone completely out of your league. It'll be well fun

explain, plz.. when ima drunk my level of english is decreased up to primary..

guys c'mon don't be a bunch of puritanic nerds..