Newgrounds.com — Everything, By Everyone.

At 10/20/09 12:35 AM, Ranchero wrote: Okay here is a real problem of mine:

I get really really reeeally nervous whenever I have to talk in front of a large group of people. To the point where my voice quivers uncontrollably. Usually this isn't a big deal except for situations like this Thursday when I have to give a large presentation in front of my class.

ps picturing everyone in their underwear doesn't work

Well, I think a lot of people seem to be missing that this thread is primarily about physical fitness, but I'll help here too.

When people have problems like this, I often see that a short shot of irrational bravado does the trick.

It may seem hard to turn the 'manly' on and off, but try to think of it as a last stand sort of thing.

So up there like it's your Goddamn death speech, look everybody in the eye, puff out your chest, and take long strides.

If you can't project your voice well, YELL. If you can, speak slowly and carefully, to try and draw out every word so you never trip up.

Most importantly, think to yourself that you are the greatest fucking thing God ever gave to mankind. This requires confidence, which ,HEY, you get in heap-loads from lifting weights.

At 10/20/09 12:21 AM, CalumnJohnston wrote:

At 10/19/09 11:22 PM, GrammerNaziElite wrote: I'd like to present an opportunity to you, Newgrounds.

I don't often come on this site, something about it reeks of immaturity to me

You have Nazi in your username?

Yes I do.

mixed with a slightly unsettling population of people perhaps too old to be fraternizing with others on this site

If newgrounds was just aload of 13 year old kids, where the fuck would all the decent flash come from? the admins? yeah right.

get lost, you hole

You seem to be missing the point of this thread. Not only are you wasting a potential opportunity to improve yourself, you are taking my generalizations and trying to apply them to exclusions I have already accounted for.

I submit to you that you are an idiot and that you should leave this thread.

At 10/20/09 12:17 AM, irishiweredrunk wrote: I'm dangerously under confident, help that and you win a cookie.

Physical exercise has been proven to increase confidence, as well as many other things. If you would like, I will provide you with a training routine for beginners that will give you a good head start into weightlifting.

My confidence SOARED once I started counting my lifts in the hundreds.

At 10/19/09 11:33 PM, PhyroDragon wrote: I am 16 and I am seriously underweight 110 pounds to be exact. What can I do to imprve this problem of mine.

I felt like contributing today.

You need to make sure you eat a minimum of 2500 calories a day and begin a steady routine of bodyweight exercises. Try this-

Mondays- Do 5 sets of pushups, all sets until you can't push-up anymore. Do it in this pattern.

narrow grip- hands close together
wide grip- hands far apart
narrow
wide
narrow

Rest two minutes between every set.

Wednesdays- Legs

take a length of walk, say, a quarter of a mile, and do a Squat-Lunge walk.

That, is, do a squat, step forward with one leg until your knee is touching the ground, stand up, put your other leg next to the first, squat, put forward the SECOND leg, ect.

Do this for ten minutes, rest for ten, and then do it again. If you're doing it right, by the end you won't be able to climb a set of stairs.

Friday- heavy crunches

Take a few books, maybe 10 pounds worth, and place it on your chest, and do crunches. Do 8 of them, rest for thirty seconds, and do 8 more. Repeat for 5 minutes.

Also, try to eat a lot of meat and pasta.

I'd like to add that I am very versed in this subject and I would very much like serious questions to be posted here. If you don't want to publicly reveal your problem feel free to PM me.

I'd like to present an opportunity to you, Newgrounds.

I don't often come on this site, something about it reeks of immaturity to me, mixed with a slightly unsettling population of people perhaps too old to be fraternizing with others on this site, moderators and administrators excluded, of course.

However, today I'd like to help the people here in the only two ways i can- Information and motivation, two powerful words that happen to rhyme.

This is, in reality, an attempted reboot of a previous thread I made, 'Official Fitness Thread', in which I attempted to answer questions people had regarding health and exercise. I overestimated Newground's willingness to improve itself, however, and the thread soon denigrated into a painful repeat of the joke, masturbating builds forearm muscles.

This thread will be different, due to a change in focus and an improved heading and preface.

I am here to answer fitness questions, ANY fitness questions, and to provide you with the motivation to attempt the solutions to such questions. The human body is capable of amazing, wondrous things, and it is a horrible waste of a life to die without witnessing the beauty of a body trained in the physical arts.

I'm going to go out on a limb here and say that most of you are not in good shape. Some of the younger people here might be unhealthily skinny, and many o the older people here may be unhealthily fat. Some may even be obese. And don't think that you're off the hook just because you aren't in any of those categories, because there is a long road between not being unhealthy and being healthy.

I want to give you a chance to improve yourselves. I have spent a considerable amount of time lately reading up on fitness, and spend a very large amount of time and effort trying to improve my body. I am boundlessly knowledgeable in this subject, and I can answer almost any relevant question thrown at me.

Not all of you may want to look huge and muscular, or lean and veiny, but I know very few people here are actually happy with how they look. Exercise reduces acne, treats depression, increases the strength of your immune system, and helps with almost any ailment any of you could possibly have.

And you may ask yourselves, 'Why should I ask this guy? Google exists.'

My answer is this- I am a PERSON. A human, a very dedicated and intelligent one at that, who takes personal and moral satisfaction from helping people. Furthermore, with me you don't have to wade through websites, through opposing opinions. You just have to wait for me to respond.

Just one post, people. One paragraph, where you present to me a problem and I will not rest until I have answered it to your satisfaction.

I know you guys want to improve yourselves, you just lack the necessary preparation.

Just... post.

I've helped others before.

I'll help you.

A lot of people such as many people of the united states underestimate children and their abilities to understand things. Sure they aren't a smart as everyone else but they can get things such as sex, death, drugs rather quickly if you give them good information. The problem with society is the underestimation of everything and having unrealisticly high goals whiliest putting down everything becasue they are simply older thus more "expirenced".

That's cool and all, but A predator can easily trick and overpower a kid. Furthermore, kids are often to scared to tell their parents what happened afterwards. Pedophiles, or at least active ones, are much more threatening than people going after fully grown adults.

But what am I doing? You're a troll.

This is the stupidest thing I've ever seen turn into a mod argument. If a heterosexual male walks into town, I don't think a husband would tell him to stay the fuck away from his wife, because the wife MARRIED him and it would be stupid to be called out like that. Same for homosexual males.

Children, however, are trusting, stupid, and weak. And uncommitted. Big difference.

Shut up you reatrd, you meant to say practice.

Retard*

I think it's funny that the OP believes that there is even the slightest chance that his Negro Empire could possibly succeed. You people can't get it together now, what makes you think they'd be any better being led by an idiot like you?

I don't think supplying guns to a home is the most efficient method of providing home safety, seeing as how many people don't want guns in their home, can't use them properly, are scared, ect.

A much better idea would to strengthen the 'Neighborhood Watch' system. Have one person per every few blocks be registered as a Watchman (Teehee). Give him a badge, handcuffs, guns, and the same responsibilities as a police officer. Give him maybe a few weeks or so of training, and set up a system where any break-in near his house will set off an an alarm in his so he can charge over to you house and kick some ass. Maybe bring along some other neighborhood Watchmen.

And, you know, being the leader of democracy in the world for 250 years. And enormous scientific and medical advances. And everything good in the world.

First of all, why can you be proud of this? I mean what did you contribute? Nothing. All you did was happen to be born in the same country afterwards.

I'm not saying I take pride in what I haven't accomplished. He said America had nothing going for it. I sagely pointed out that we have accomplished more than any other country in history.

Good for you! Patriotism is a great thing.
There is no American Pride though, because you really have nothing to BE proud of. Except Big Macs, Coke, and previously having one of the worst politicions ever created. (Hopefully Obama will make up for him, though.)

And, you know, being the leader of democracy in the world for 250 years. And enormous scientific and medical advances. And everything good in the world.

Exactly! Want! Not need, there are only three basic needs! Food, Water, Shelter! And the community can provide that for one another rather than gloating about it in the faces of those who can afford or can't do for themselves.

So who is going to slog through medical school if they can get the same pay picking up trash?

One last thing, the Africans did actually deserve to become slaves due to their lack of scientific, military, and technological advancement

I guarantee you, absolutely guarantee, that if we met in real life, I could kick your ass. So I'm making a mental note to kill you, and possibly rape your mother and sister too because they are women and therefor weaker than me, so they aren't human.

I on the other hand, am for stem cell research and I personally don't care about cloning (I don't find anything wrong with human cloning, though I'm sure you or others will give me your "morals" for why we shouldn't have it).

I understand what you're saying, but the above sentence supports my theory. You are FOR stem cell research, and EH on cloning. So you find it more morally justifiable to use stem cells than to clone.

So basically it's "ok" to use tax payer money to subsidize the destruction of human embryos in the name of 'Science!' but it's against our morals to use the same technology to allow for me to clone myself.

Well, one of them is using a group of non-living cells to heal other, living people. In fact, most stem cells don't even come from aborted fetuses. VERY LITTLE come from aborted fetuses.

Cloning is creating another, living, thinking creature with no parents, no history, and no proper upbringing. If you can just clone things, you take value away from proper life. It's morally ambiguous, but I still think a pretty definite line can be drawn.

At 8/10/09 11:57 PM, Memorize wrote:

At 8/10/09 11:16 PM, GrammerNaziElite wrote:

Though I thought it was pretty funny that within just a few sentences of saying that "morality shouldn't get in the way of science", he then said that "cloning has no place in our society or any other".

Quote on the morality bit? I'll eat my shoe if he said that.

It was a rough quote, but here ya go!

An incredibly rough quote. I'm almost certain that he was referring to RELIGION. Of course, he couldn't blatantly say that religion was halting scientific progress, what with this being America and all. As for the cloning bit, I'm pretty sure conventional morality covers that, not just religious morality. I think cloning's a bit iffy and I love stem cell research.

Though I thought it was pretty funny that within just a few sentences of saying that "morality shouldn't get in the way of science", he then said that "cloning has no place in our society or any other".

Quote on the morality bit? I'll eat my shoe if he said that.

Always willing to help...

poxpower, what should I do?

I'm Pox's alt.

If you live in a society where atheism is frowned upon, I recommend that you slowly transition into a state of mind where you have an agnostic point of view. I've felt a voice inside myself before, many people have. However, these are caused naturally, and what you attribute them to is a matter of choice.

Be an atheist. It's a surprisingly serene way to look upon the world, to know that nothing happens that is out of the control of those who can manipulate and harness natural laws. Not God, nothing 'random' left. Every thing that has not been explained suddenly becomes a wonder that needs solving.

It's great.

Who is going to pay for the army? Or scientific research? Or road and sewage repair? Or keep your neighbor from shooting you and taking your house?

Anarchy never works.

You know what would be really cool? If butthurt Christians would debate the actual arguments presented instead of trying to play off the validity of the posts by saying they were made by a troll. A mod troll. With 15 thousand posts.

I bet my life that every person saying Pox is a troll was just offended by his opposing argument to your hypocrisy.

Bump, just giving some more members the opportunity to better understand their bodies and the improvement thereof.

No, it's a form of government that is completely incompatible with human nature. IT WILL NEVER WORK.

At 7/29/09 04:01 AM, Psychophobia wrote: What's the best way to be able to do a lot of push ups?

I'm afraid I don't understand.

At 7/28/09 05:10 PM, WingCommand wrote: I'm eating healthier because my mom has yet to buy any fucking food to eat. I have one 15 pound dumbell, and I'm planning to walk my dog more or get a jump rope.
Is this a decent workout? I'm not into getting super buff, just not fat.

It's not a 'workout', per say, but dog walking, healthy food, and occasional jump rope should be more than enough to ensure that you don't get fat. If you want abs, consult my earlier posts.

At 7/28/09 05:09 PM, GiantDouche wrote: You're not a better person than me because you went to the fucking gym.

I'm aware of that. However, it more likely than not means that I am healthier than you, and therefor physically better. You seem to have some self-esteem issues on this subject, if you would like to get into better shape I would be more than happy to personally counsel you.

Mankind has never been as brutal as people like to think. We are no less civil than monkeys or dolphins, the only difference is that our technology allows us much more freedom in killing others. I've never really thought to condone the actions of nations so long as they had a morally justifiable reason, and the moral high ground.

Firebombing Germans? Absolutely cool. We were in the largest war of our time, fighting against a group of people so evil the entire war played out like a GI Joe comic.

Invading Vietnam? Still alright, I suppose, because we weren't doing it for selfish reasons. Communism was and still is a major threat to the world, and though Vietnam was played out horribly, at least we had governmental superiority to determine what a shithole Vietnam was.

Iraq? EEEEEEEH. Not so much. Saddam was not a major threat to jack shit.

As for the enemy soldiers killing our soldiers, they have every right to. We no longer live in the 40's, where everything America did was right and the enemies were satan. The same goes for our soldiers. They would kill our women and children in an instant, because they don't think of us as people. Not the insurgents, at least. But our soldiers, at least most of them, do actually show some degree of compassion to the civilians who aren't shooting at them.

We still have the moral highground, but we have it over a bunch of lunatic despots and terrorists, so we're not doing so well.

I don't know why we're all hatin' on the new kid, I rather like him. He reminds me of one of my best friends.

At 7/29/09 12:18 AM, HandsomePete wrote:

I'm pretty sure that's The Comedian.

*Ahem*

"Once you realize what a joke everything is, being the Comedian is the only thing that makes sense." ~ The Comedian.

You mean the Joker.