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He saw the Asian Naked Awkward Police Patrol!!!!!!

At 5/21/10 11:49 PM, TwilightRules wrote: This movie made me sick to my stomach.
Seriously, watch that trailer and tell me you're not going to lose sleep.

Bullshit. Another "creepy DIY surgeon" movie that's going to fail on a massive scale. If that fucked your sleep, I want to see what happens when you go pay a visit to the lovely chaps from UncoverReality.

Play chicken with the honking semi truck.

At 5/22/10 08:50 PM, Ninjar wrote: Wtf just happened?

/wrists

Here's not one, but two gifts for you.

Hurry up and open them.

At 5/22/10 07:59 PM, Dubbi wrote: Well, I'm relatively new to newgrounds, and I've heard many stories of the moderator hear who goes by the name of EyeLovePoozy. And many of these stories tell of his massive dick, (or just that he is a massive dick) so I want to know the truth.

We cannot estimate its size yet, but we do know it has clogged the super-massive black hole at the center of our galaxy. And, by knowing the dimensions of a super-massive black hole,we can only assume the respective organ is of inconceivable proportions.

It is very difficult to notice this man's presence during the hours of nights deprived of the moon's ghostly radiance.

At 5/21/10 10:49 PM, lifeofmystery wrote: take me home, to the paradise city, where the grass and green, and the girls are pretty, oh yeah, take me home, yeah yeah.

paradise city by guns and roses, and if i remember correctly its in appetite for destruction album.

Yes yes yes yes yes yes!

I love you.

At 5/21/10 08:56 PM, andycastaneda wrote: FUCK. Stop fucking it up! Don't you know how to do this?

This post is directed toward all in this thread.

My dear gentleman, I have strong feelings of suspicion towards the notion that you possess a level of cognition and volition high enough to perform a task such as reading all the posts of this thread. Furthermore, the people seem to distaste your views on humor, and therefore you are not welcome amongst this group of fellows.
Kindly use the "back" button, and close the door behind you.

Anything "hardcore" death metal.

A bunch of abused sissies with troubled childhoods venting their anger and frustration into a microphone while raping my cochleas with their overly-rapid overture of musical cacophony distributed through massive amplifiers, just for shits and giggles.

Guitars have been risen, but testicles have not descended yet.

At 5/19/10 09:54 PM, RacistBassist wrote:

At 5/19/10 09:46 PM, Chdonga wrote: Oh baaaw a baby who technically was never alive died. That's terrible that no one feels sorry that a dead baby has now legally died.

You've never lost someone or you feel no empathy. The mom got so attached to the baby, and that is what makes this story so tragic.

No. You feel sorrow and empathy when you lose something that you truly have a mutual relationship with.

She got attached to a husk, an empty human shell which has no feelings or reactions of any sort towards anyone. As far as feelings are concerned, she could have just as well become attached to a sirloin.
When two-headed animals and other unusual entities are born, they are dissected by a few scientists, they are thoroughly analyzed, then they are disposed of. When a baby with no brain is born - a human body without the one thing that makes it truly human - suddenly the family becomes a national symbol, they are on TV, in Oprah's studio, wherever the media can get them in order to make more money out of the gullible masses who are glued to their screens in a fit of exaggerated sentimentality.
They turn a brainless baby into a national wonder. Turn bad luck into fame, and an error of nature into a symbol of faith, strength, and other mighty-sounding attributes. And the parents of this "symbol" get to live a few good years off royalty checques and donations. I'm not saying it's not emotionally hard for anyone to have such an incident happen to them - but when they start to get on the news and live off donations because of it, it's starting to irk me.

How about this - instead ofwasting millions of dollars making shows and reports on an unusual genetic anomaly, why not use that money for something more productive? Like, for example, to perform some fucking cancer research, or maybe to build a factory where people who want a job but can't get one can work, be of use, and earn some money? Or maybe invest it into something that will actually be of help to society?

In this case, no, I do not approve of all this mindless advertising and waste of money. For what? For the world to see a genetic anomaly. Millions spent so the hordes of sentimental couch potatoes can have their heartstrings tugged by reporters who glorify a being which will, unfortunately, never be able to be truly alive. And of course, no-one thinks to use that money in medicine, genetics research, or other vital studies.

Who needs a better future when you've got mushy, sentimental TV shows? Put the present in higher regard than the future. It's a hypocrisy of massive proportions.

At 5/20/10 05:06 PM, ChocEliteBar wrote:

At 5/20/10 04:53 PM, DevilDog016 wrote: If you get this, you are a respectable man.

... Paradise City?

You have earned my gratitude.

If you get this, you are a respectable man.

At 4/19/10 10:11 PM, 5FootLobster wrote:

At 4/19/10 09:58 PM, DevilDog016 wrote: Stick the Gamecube up your father's ass.

rather not. and if i did, you would most likely say "pics or it didnt happen" sicko

Of course I would! Why else would I ask you to force a large electronic gaming device through your father's anal sphincter?

What?
Sir Gangster is evolving!

At 5/25/09 04:27 AM, kamelona wrote: Holy what the fuck?!?!

Whoops, looks like somebody fucked with the Omnitrix settings again.

Situational Irony.

Stick the Gamecube up your father's ass.

At 4/19/10 07:08 PM, JKMonkey wrote: what flavor is it?

Pure Concentrated Homosexuality.

no MSG, of course.

"Original text:

"Who's the faggot with the tuba? "

...10 translations later we get:

"What brick package?"

...I'm not even to comment this one. I'm too perplexed for my brain to function.

At 3/9/10 08:35 PM, CalvinGodly wrote: I have seen multiple threads on weed, what the fuck?

Nice trolling.

Go parade your facade of innocence to someone who doesn't see through it like they do through a 2-cm crystal-clear glass pane.

He can't die, he's a superhero!

Time to bring on the classics!

From what you say, I'm afraid that you might have had a kernel rootkit. Kernel rootkits are the most dangerous because they operate hand-in-hand with your OS, after modifying its files of course. So basically you now have a copy of Windows that has been altered and damaged. Kernel Rootkits are quite hard to remove, and the fact that one program found it and "removed" it isn't the end of your troubles. Those little buggers copy themselves in multiple locations, and are sometimes equipped with redundant protection systems - e.g. you remove KR at location A, the KR at location B copies itself back to location A before the antivirus finds KR-B, then KR-A copies itself back to location B and so on, but only with many more locations than A and B. KR's can even modify antivirus programs into reading them as harmless.

I'd try a System Restore if I were you - to a period before you first had the rootkit problem. You might have to reinstall some programs due to the rollbacks that Windows makes, but most of the times System Restores "confuse" the virus/malware/rootkit for a short period, then you can crush it with your security programs.

If that doesn't work, I'm afraid your copy of Windows has been damaged past the point at which you could return to normal operation - I thus suggest you start making back-ups of all your important files on DVDs, USB sticks and.or portable harddrives. Re-format your Windows harddrive, reinstall the OS, install all your programs, move your data back and that's it.

At 2/14/10 10:18 PM, LeNoir wrote:

At 2/14/10 10:14 PM, k6ka wrote: Maybe he had a relative who died. Maybe he lost his friend. Maybe he was hired to cry.

Are you saying that he is not authentically crying? You heartless bastard!

In Ancient Egypt, women were hired to cry at funerals, then they went home and laughed at cat jokes. They didn't cry fo' real.

The same way I am not right now.

I think I'm immune to it, I can drink up to 3 liters a day with no side effects! I can make a vaccine out of my own blood, and save humanity like that black guy did in I Am Legend!

$100 per person.

1.21 GIGAWATTS

At 2/12/10 01:38 PM, Saxturbation wrote:

At 2/12/10 01:09 PM, DevilDog016 wrote:

At 2/12/10 12:11 PM, Saxturbation wrote: Psh don't piss on my parade.

May I please have a bucket, so I can divert the stream of urine?

Why yes here you are kind sir.

Thank you, kind sir. My urine is now safely pooling into this handsome metal bucket! How amazingly useful such a simple item can be.

Go back in time and buttsecks yourself while you're sleeping.

Dr.Foreman - death by cerebral hyperactivity due to the increased blood flow caused by the erection of his neck
Stamper - accidentally swallows cigar butt, chokes to death.
Twilight - gang-rape, anus torn to shreds.
Jamoke - grape-flavored beverage containing traces of arsenic; subsequent poisoning.
Tom Fulp - electrocution due to rodent-chewed wire that came in contact with his penis (don't ask how).
Wade Fulp - punched in face, shards from sunglasses driven into the brain.
Excursius - aorta sliced by little Adam with sharp plastic ruler.
GiantDouche - swallowing of own penis during autofellatio, subsequent asphyxiation.
Sanjay - death by suicide, flies a small executive jet filled with explosives into the Empire State Building.
EyeLovePoozy - trips on crane ladder, falls 70 meters, landing on top of a half-finished concrete pillar, gets impaled on dozens of steel rebar rods.
TacticalShoe - hit with a boot by former President Bush, severe head concussion, subsequent death.
Catoblepas - accidentally drinks 597 mL of injectable cocaine solution.
gumOnShoe - trips on sidewalk, gets hit by the Stride van.
DevilDog016 - kills himself along with few others after discovering an unexploded nuclear device in the desert and smashing it with a large sledgehammer.

you'll see its true.