I've just read every post here and my impressions are this: A guy who probally had a great life until he found out he had this horrid disease 6 years before he is going to die. And I'm thinking you shouldn't as many have said step into your kids shoes a minute and think: "Would my kids be more proud of me if I commited suicide and didn't spend the last year with them or would they be more proud of me if I battle the disease and have a slight chance of surviving and spending the rest of life with them, even if you don't survive the disease at least you'd be spending your final year with them.". Not only that but commiting suicide could really fuck up their lives. I know that dying would fuck it up too, but not as worse especially since I semi-relate to your kids in when my mom was Suicidal when she got severe depression, I don't remember why although I remember it being something incredibly pathetic to kill yourself over, luckily for me she eventually got over it but I was mentally scarred because she would usually be all suicidal and depressed when my dad was at work, so I always felt so alone and helpless in which turned me depressed when I was going on 9, which by the way was when she got mental help from a Therapist, but when I was 11 the depression started to turn into rage and anger which eventually lead for two years of Anger problems until I was 13 and by then I would beat up kid's for the stupidest things and most of my dumbass teachers just punished me which enraged me even more but one of my Teacher's(Who, I basically owe my life to, because today with all the gangs in my Neighbourhood, I fear if I still had those problems, I'd be running with a gang..) actually noticed when questioning my parents about how I used to be all depressed and now I'm a bastard that bullies kids out of anger. He realized I had Anger problems and got me into Anger Management courses.
So, my mom didn't even commit suicide, she just threatened too...Imagine what it can do to your kids if you actually did, I don't think they'd be severely depressed if you went with a natural death, but suicide does bad things to a child's mind.
And if you still aren't convinced at least take this into consideration: If you really need to do it, do itsomewhere your kid's wont see your body and a adult will find it instead, that way they don't have to see your body and be mentally scarred. But still don't do it man, you might be lucky enough to survive and some miracle happens. Also I'd write a book your life seems like it would be interesting to read about, who know's the sale's money could go to your wife and kids.
