Newgrounds.com — Everything, By Everyone.

At 11/25/14 11:31 PM, satanbrain wrote: I am Sithis.

We have an outside the box thinker here! Sithis, or Padomay, or Lorkhan, or Shezzarine, or just Shezzar, was the primordial deity of chaos and change who sundered the nothingness of stasis which Anu filled the Vid with, and that was how Aurbis formed Mundus and Nirn. When Padomay fought Anu, his blood spilled, spawning the Daedra. With Anu's, the stars formed, and where both intermingled, the Aedra were borne.

Hey, 68 people lost their lives in the Rodney King riots in the 90s. I attribute this to proper policing going on in Ferguson right now. Instead of people being hurt, only property is being hurt, really.

The people of Ferguson should, frankly, thank their PD for this.

EDIT: Rodney King was just beaten, not killed. The police response of preventing aggressive action is SUBSTANTIALLY better than it was 20 years ago, and that is definitely a good thing. I'll say this every day, criminology is one of the best fields of study man ever created.

If I were a mod, I'd let you do it, as long as you call it what it is: The Sucking Dick Club. Cuz that's all you're gonna be doing.

At 11/25/14 10:57 PM, Nickisabi wrote: The mercy of Stendarr does not extend to Daedra worshippers!

The nine divine are boring. Daedra? They're never boring!

At 11/25/14 09:36 PM, Maltos wrote: god of the drink

Ahhh, Sanguine. A popular choice. His domain is lust, sin, sloth, gluttony, and greed. He is the patron deity of sinners and enjoys pranks on hapless mortals, but prefers to drag mortals down by their own volition through temptation and humiliation.

There are 16 different Daedric princes, each with his or her own realm of oblivion. Sometimes depicted as male or female, such terms are irrelevant to Daedra, as they cannot die, reproduce or create anything, only change what is already there.

Azura: You are the prince of Dusk and Dawn. You are omniscient and understand all things, but cannot speak of them, or you speak in riddles. Your realm is called moonshadow. Visitors go half blind from the beauty. Flowers and waterfalls, majestic trees, a city of silver. The colors run like water, and the wind smells like perfume. Your artifact is Azura's star, a soul gem of outstanding worth. Your champions are winged twilights, which resemble harpies.

Boethiah: Your sphere of influence is over deceit, conspiracy, secret plots of murder, assassination, treason, and unlawful overthrow of authority. You love competition and battle. You ate and shat out whole another Daedric prince to spite him. Your realm consists of stormy skies, volcanic islands and lava seas, a country of labyrinthine policy and betrayals, with maze gardens and twisted towers. It is sometimes referred to as Attribution's Share or Snake Mount. Your artifact is the ebony mail, and the goldbrand, a fire blade.

Clavicus Vile: Your sphere of influence is the granting of wishes which always backfire. You are seen many times with a faithful hound, Barbas. You have been known to help vampires blend in with the rest of society. Your realm is a peaceful countryside spotted with deadly yellow demons. Your artifacts are a sword that steals souls called Umbra, a helmet that makes you charming called the Masque of Clavicus Vile, and the Bittercup, which boosts your highest talent even further while making your least efficient area even more difficult.

Hermaeus Mora: You are the keeper of forbidden knowledge, secrets and other's memories. You are a gross mass of tentacles inspired by Lovecraft fiction. Your realm is Apocrypha, an endless maze like library filled with ghosts and floating tomes. Your artifact is the Oghma Infinium, which the reader can read to achieve near demi-god abilities.

Hircine, father of werewolves and werecrocodiles. Champion of the hunt. He always gives his prey a chance of victory, for that is the sport of the hunt. His realm is the Hunting Grounds, where endless hunts await his followers in death. His artifact is the curaiss of savior's hide, a leather tunic peeled off the only hunter to ever escape his realm alive.

Jyggalag: The direct opposite of Sheogorath, the god of madness.

Malacath: The friend of the friendless, the spurned, the outcast, the hated, the scorned, Orcs, ogres and all manner of ugly creatures call you father, and you hate beautiful people. You are the patron of the betrayed, ostracized. You realm is the Ashpit, and your artifact is Volendrung, a warhammer that was used to found a nation.

Mehrunes Dagon: Daedric Prince of Destruction, Change, Revolution, Energy, and Ambition. He is associated with natural dangers like fire, earthquakes, and floods. His realm is the deadlands, a very similar version of hell. Your champions are scamps and clannfears, tiny bipedal dinosaurs and your artifact is Mehrune's Razor, which has a chance to instantly kill with a single slash.

Mephala: The webspinner. You delight in weaving a web of deceit and lies around mortals, always secret plots and collusions. Your artifact is the ebony blade, also called the vampire or leech sword.

Molag Bal: The prince of rape. Sired the first vampire from a virgin maiden in an effort to mock the very concept of life. (Almost as edgy as Tony-Darkgrave, almost) His main pleasure is the domination and subjugation of mortals. His servants are giant bulky bipedal lizards. Coldharbour, his home, is a land of sludge with frigid air and a sky that is on fire. His artifact is a mace that can steal souls.

Namira: Ancient darkness. She is known as the Spirit Daedra, ruler of sundry dark and shadowy spirits, and is often associated with spiders, insects, slugs, and other repulsive creatures which inspire mortals with an instinctive revulsion. (Sensationalism anyone?) Her realm is the Scuttling Void.

Nocturnal: Night Mistress, The Unknowable, Empress of Murk, Daughter of Twilight, and The Saint of Suspicion. Her realm is the evergloam, the cradle of shadow. Her artifacts are the Gray Cowl, which can hide anyone's identity, the Skeleton Key, can open any door, and the Bow of Shadows.

Peryite: Ruler of the lowest orders. His sphere of influence is over pestilence, as well as plague bearers such as rats, insects, and other vermin. His realm is known as the Pits, and is the lowest portion of oblivion it's self, resembling a gloomy hellish waste. His artifact is Spellbreaker, a shield that can repel any magic attack.

Sanguine is a Daedric Prince whose sphere is hedonistic revelry, debauchery, and passionate indulgences of darker natures. Fittingly, he often appears on the seals and signs of brothels and whorehouses. (Why do I feel you'll all pick this one?) His realm, named Misty Grove, is a mist-filled copse of trees crossed by burbling streams and paths with small stone bridges, lit by lanterns in an eternal early evening. His artifact is the Sanguine Rose.

Sheogorath: God of madness. Nuff said. He can either harm or hurt you, and is just as likely to do either, or both. His realm is the Shivering Isles, or the Madhouse. He has the most artifacts: Spear of Bitter Mercy, Fork of Horripilation, Gampolpuddy, Wabbajack, etc. staves. He has a penchant for walking staves.

Vaermina: Sphere of influence is tha of dreams, nightmares, evil omens, torture. Her realm is Quagmire, a nightmare realm where every few minutes, the scene changes to something even more horrifying than the last. Her artifact is the skull of corruption, which has a mind of it's own!

At 11/25/14 07:55 PM, TheGamechanger wrote: Out of all the users, it has to be this person. No other users has given me so many chills.

You got me with that one

At 11/25/14 05:21 PM, wildfire4461 wrote: Terrorists.

There are three groups of people: pacifists with starry eyed dreams of kumbaya, disenfranchised blacks who feel "put down" by the white man, and anonymous. Anonymous has injected themselves in each of these ranks, and where a shit eating grin as they fire random shots in the air trying to invite further violence.

Anonymous are the ones to blame. I've hated anonymous ever since OWS and time has proven me right about every dangerous thing I've said they are.

Thanks for always answering my questions about law, Camaraohusky. It's a tricky, big business, and it helps now more than ever to understand it since we have a law for everything these days...

To say thanks, here's a picture

At 11/24/14 11:46 PM, koopahermit wrote: Live footage of Ferguson

All lil' Mikie Brown wanted was to become a police officer. It was his dream ever since he was a kid. But Darren Wilson wouldn't let him play make-believe with his badge and gun when he wanted to see them. This is why we need to teach sharing to cops.

Has nobody said "fuck you" as a rule compliant post so far?

I have a burning question about drugs.

So, for literally years I was told inside the classroom that, under the law, you are still in control of your actions when intoxicated/under influence of other substances. I have had this similar message reiterate by the media, almost entirely radio shows I enjoy, and by confidants and friends as well.

"I was on booze, Joe." "That doesn't matter, you're still in charge of your actions."

Now, I am about to talk about the most hotly contested seven-letter word in the English world today: consent

I can't recall where, but there are training programs in certain New England state universities, fairly progressive places, explaining to possible bystanders how to intervene between potential hook ups in the alcohol soaked environments of college campuses, in cases where the female (the male was not specified if brought up at all) does not have enough faculties to give "reasonable consent" for intercourse. College is essentially teaching their students it is their duty to cock block each other.

Now, barring my awful rushed anecdote, has something changed in the legal realm with the concept of consent? As i iterated above, I have been taught since time immemorium that you can be as strung as a violin, and yes still means yes, because you chose to ingest mind altering toxins (according to the state's legal logic)

At 11/24/14 07:37 PM, Avery wrote: IM A MALE, I THINK YOU'RE CUTE, BETTER TOUCH YOUR DAMN TOES BECAUSE I CAN'T CONTROL MY SEX DRIVE LIKE A WOMEN CAN, BECAUSE IM A MALE AND I DESERVE TO HAVE MY DICK CHOPPED OFF!

I saw a thread by you called "Child porn on the internet" yesterday get taken down within minutes. Wtf did you do that made BrentheMan use his delete button?

"It is the first responsibility of every citizen to question authority."

Benjamin Franklin

"The younger generation is supposed to rage against the machine, not for it. They're supposed to question authority, not question those who question authority."

Bill Maher

"Unthinking respect for authority is the greatest enemy of truth."

Albert Einstein

Answer me this....what happened to this kind of mindset among you guys?

Why are we picking on Bill Cosby for something he was born as? He didn't choose to be black. Why would somebody choose to be black? Why would somebody choose to be a rapist for the same reason? Stop the hate. When did YOU choose to be white or to be a conditional sexual partner?

I thought of voicing my dissent towards multiple partner relationships and how unstable and volatile they can be, but whats the point? Reading the tea leaves, this will be a state-recognized entity in a few years, with books being marketed to kids titled "Jennifer Has 6 Dads". There have already been bevy of reality shows on the same subject.

The cultural steamroller steams on. Stand in it's way? Haha, don't be silly.

Call him king, call his administration a regime, call him whatever you want, but this guy is definitely worse than Bush ever was

There's never "no reason" for killing people. Police/anybody always have a reason for discharging their weapons, it's just some people don't always like their reasons.

At 11/24/14 12:22 AM, DoctorStrongbad wrote: When they find Bill Cosby guilty I will laugh and be happy. His sentence will be life in prison eating only Jello pudding pops.

Best post so far

Does OP realize how hard it is to accomplish this? Imagine a condom for a 2 foot Pygmy, that's how small the opening is. Hell, my urethra is wider than an uncontracted balloon. If you have the dexterity to make a piss balloon, hats off to you

"Not that there's anything wrong with that." Etc. etc. etc.

That particular symbol, which is against your topic discussion, is our most common symbol

These nostalgia threads make me feel like an old prick

At 11/22/14 01:38 AM, DoctorStrongbad wrote: Not everybody can afford or need a phone, but everybody needs toilets.

Not necessarily. The reason Americans can't drink the water in Mexico is because it is loaded with bacteria from people shitting in holes in the ground, like outhouses. The shit seeps into the water supply, and thus you get the hot poops that feel like shitting razor blades.

But the reason Mexicans don't get calienté caca is because they have built up their immune system over the years to where they can deal with a reasonable amount of poo in their water. The same goes for many other such developing countries in the world: the locals just get used to "rust colored" water.

I think I exceeded the maximum number of fæces references in one post

At 11/21/14 10:44 PM, BrenTheMan wrote: I think the smell of a woman without any fragrance is intoxicating itself (one that I'm attracted to, dating, etc.) especially a day or two after their last shower.

Same, I have never met a girl who smelled bad because I don't think it's possible to. Or maybe I'm just a pig who doesn't care anymore. Hmm...

At 11/21/14 08:56 PM, Monster-64 wrote: Cool.

At 11/21/14 08:05 AM, X-Gary-Gigax-X wrote: stuff

I should clarify about my Neo-Ellis Island idea. These wouldn't be actual islands, instead I'd see them as federal buildings positioned in key foot-route locations all along the Mexican border. You'd walk in, it may inevitably take a day, but you'd have papers that start your naturalization process towards being an American citizen: something that is the highest aspiration of half the people on this planet.

We are still an extra ordinary nation, as much as some would like to see us as an ordinary one.

Also, glad you liked my post, @lazydrunk :3

At 11/21/14 12:25 PM, Camarohusky wrote:

At 11/21/14 05:58 AM, SadisticMonkey wrote: man those gamergate people sure are a bunch of hateful misogynists

That picture represents everything wrong with gamergate. It's quite funny. They're so deluded they don't understand. They try to act like evry single attack on them make everything they say right and everything said against them wrong.

I felt lost, so I had to look up what gamergate is. I learned everything from who they align themselves with, Reddit and 4chan.

As far as hate groups are concerned, hate is a subjective term, and when it is used as an objective term by people like the SPLC, the temptation for misuse is too great, and so the word is often a political rhetoric tool. I don't put much or any stock in the word 'hate' anymore. I see hate going every which way every day. If every group ever made was labeled a hate group, I'd be happy.

I have had this idea for years. You won't stop people crossing the border, that's a guarantee. And if you do try to stop them, suddenly it's injustice for brown people even though every other nation in the world would shoot first and ask questions later if you wandered in to their sovereign territory. (Or chain your 4 limbs to a bed for 150+ days as was done to our own citizen)

Let's create a new Ellis Island. Not one, but three, or four or more. Just make naturalization quick, easy and painless. Progs would have to love the tax revenue from coming in from such a huge increase to the tax base.

Not to mention, though this is allegorical, Hispanics can do the work of two men. They're astounding.

Only problem is, since it's Uncle Sam we are talking about, naturalization would be a cross between the DMV, the VA, and the post office rolled together as far as efficiency is concerned. Not to mention there would be millions of applicants....it would be a pure manhattan project of effort if it was public. (Private on the other hand?)

So the first thing you do when you have a gaping wound in your national border? Stop the bleeding. We are worried about cleaning blood off the carpet and giving pain killers to the patient as opposed to sealing the wound and letting it clot/sewing it up.

Secure the border. That's any government's only legitimate role in the first place.

At 11/19/14 10:11 PM, Vinnyy wrote:

At 11/19/14 07:26 PM, fmn335 wrote:
I have 6, and each of them has Flatscrean T.V the squirts vanilla ice cream in your mouth when you open wide. Even on the pot.

I have a fat sidekick who can squirt his troubling emotions from nipples on his ass.

I'm completely immune to any kind of emotions.

I have a plastic fork.

I have....a spork. HAH!

Also, want to join my 360 420 #rekt MLG no-scope quick-scope lobby? You'll never beat me