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He drinks himself into a tepid unyielding coma due to being associated with such a thread.

This one dimensional character.

Chester Z Niffbogger.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-asia-21299324

This honestly seems like footage from a stasi interrogation.
Japan, honestly?

I haven't been on here for a while, so apologies if tumblr links are frowned upon or considered spam and whatnot.

But my Facebook newsfeed has exploded in the space of half an hour, with people commenting on this advert (Commercial to you delightful American folk).

Mostly it's preceded by all caps variations of the phrase 'OMG THIS IS SO TERRIFYING'.

Just intrigued as to what folks on here would make of it, as I'm assuming there are some people on the opposite side of the camp who are fine with it.

http://a-large-bearded-man.tumblr.com/post/28733076215/that-
ad-should-be-illegal

I'm the guy from page 247, the hilarious kooky depressive.

Anyway, it's been a month since I posted here, and nearly 2 since I last physically spoke to this girl in person.
.I text her last week with some polite 'good luck with your interview' 'good luck with your dissertation' non-committal or non pressured messages, and she did reply positively and in a lighthearted yet reserved manner. I did this for a few days (of course stopping after a few texts, because again, I'm not obsessing) until she stopped replying after about 4 days. I saw her last week as we went to hand in some university work, and we again, had a few polite, yet slightly awkward, small talk sentences, and I text her saying 'it was nice to see you earlier, hope you got great marks on your dissertation', but again she never replied.

I've been talking to some people on depression forums, and some of the more respected moderators suggested that, if she won't meet me, to give her a letter. So, I wrote her this.

""Hey *Name*, I was hoping to do this in person so you could see how serious and honest I'm being, but I can make do writing this although some things will be condensed. I'm guessing I've gone from one of your favourite people here to somebody you pretty much hate the very existence of, because that's the movie I've been watching...and it's not a good one.
I'm sorry I never told you about my depression, I didn't want to scare you off. I need to stress that what I'm about to say isn't an excuse, alibi or defense. I feel horrid and incredibly guilty for things I've said or how I've acted. I completely understand your reaction.
But the truth?
The truth is for the past year (so before we met) I've been on the verge of having a nervous breakdown and had no idea about it. Please try to understand the reality of that and what it's meant for me and my personality. It's only after 6 weeks of therapy I realise this and genuinely do feel a different person to who I've been since being diagnosed.
I hope you can understand there is a HUGE difference between the depressed me and and the real me. I pushed you away with my depression and shut you out from who I was, the honest truth is you don't know who I am, I've not been myself.
I hope you understand this is NOT an 'ex' trying to talk to you or manipulate you with tricks, I'm not being clingy or obsessive. It's a completely different level of a situation and I hope you can see why I've been so eager to talk to you and explain.
We've got such a good thing and I don't want to lose it or throw it away because of my depression, because then my depression owns me & my relationships with people.
I've got a lot of making up to do, and more things to explain, but please realise this is GOOD news, because now I can act on it and be who I want to be, with you and when I talk to you.
I understand if after what I've put you through you don't want to see what I'm like or the person you thought I was over X-mas, that's understandable. You needed to know the truth and I'm ready to talk if you are, but I'm not hassling you or trying to rush or force things, it's entirely your decision : ).

Signed the ACTUAL me.

Anyway, I text her on sunday telling her I needed to give her something important, she said 'I won't meet you unless you tell me what it is', I told her, she told me to put it in the mail box in our University college common room. I know she's taken it as it's no longer there (Well, I hope it's her), but I've not heard from her yet, and I suppose I'm just being rather stressed or impatient, or worried she's apathetic about the whole thing.
I hate to sound cocky or arrogant, but I know that if I can just talk to her face to face, then she'll see how honest and serious I am being. I feel so incredibly guilty about the whole thing, and I suppose I'm desperate to sort it out and 'fight back' against my depression and salvage the damage it's caused.

At 4/23/12 05:58 AM, Vincoid wrote:

At 4/22/12 09:03 PM, Glides wrote: Well, the intent was to actually make HIM laugh, but I guess it backfired. None of that was intended to be offensive, even if that's the way you took it. Sorry to offend, bro.

Hey, no problem. From a neutral point of view, it's actually something you can laugh about, but that's hardly ever the case for someone who's asking for advice. Making that step and getting jokes in return while you're hoping for something that will help (feeling helpless even) can make things worse. I believe that's a risk you shouldn't want to take. So I'm not offended or anything, I just want to make sure nobody else is.

I personally didn't find it offensive, I just thought it was a dick move. But yeah, even in an emotionally fraught state it's not the best thing to read, there's a time and a place for 'roasting'.

This is not said place.

At 4/19/12 03:35 PM, Vincoid wrote:

Moving on doesn't necessarily mean you're giving up and letting go. You're simply acknowledging that life is about growth, and letting someone else decide for you what your life will look like is preventing growth from happening.

Thanks Vincoid, you've been a great help, moreso than most sites or people I've spoken with.

D

I text her apologizing for the argument yesterday, telling her why I couldn't tell her in text, that I have changed, that I'll give her time and whatnot.
Well, she's blocked me completely off facebook...so that's re-assuring.

At 4/18/12 11:49 PM, Vincoid wrote:

At 4/18/12 10:49 AM, TheTrooper5 wrote: I text her telling her I needed to tell her something important and it'd only take about 15 minutes if she wanted to come over this week.

I got "Sorry I'm not ready , I have work to do so I need to focus on that."

That sucks man. Don't worry though, you'll have to give her some time.

Does she know that you're working on yourself? That you've been talking to a counselor? If not, let her know. You see, if it is time that she needs, I understand. But usually, what time does is it makes you forget about the small negative experiences you've had with someone. Which is why so many people get back with there ex or start thinking about them again.
When the negativity fades, all that remains is the positive. In your case, you have to make sure there's something positive she can think of when the negativity fades. Not saying there was never anything positive, but I think it won't be enough to get her to want to get back with you.
That's why you'll need to let her know, in detail, what you're changing about yourself. Letting her know you're getting professional advice is a big step and will let her know you're being serious.

You don't necessarily have to tell her in person. Just let her know in any way and give her time to think about it. Don't contact her after you've told her unless she contacts you about it. And wait at least a month before contacting her again when you've heard nothing from her.
You'll basicly have to "meet and get to know" her again.

I told her I couldn't tell her over a text because, it just wouldn't feel right, it would lose the personal feel and honesty. It's like why people don't get married over text, but she's getting annoyed at that.
She just told me she wasn't 'mentally strong enough' to see me and got quite angry about how she never said the break was over.
She knows I've seen a counselor, but I guess she doesn't know the massive change I've gone.
We ended on a bad note last night, so I'm going to text her later apologising, explaining why I can't tell her over a text, and telling her that what I need to tell her, whilst changing the dynamic of our past relationship, is nothing but good news.
I only ignored the break because I really didn't feel like that person I was 2 months ago, and I guess I just got excited about her meeting this new person, the person she thought I was.

Cheers Vincoid, I gathered he was being an inane dick.

I text her telling her I needed to tell her something important and it'd only take about 15 minutes if she wanted to come over this week.

I got "Sorry I'm not ready , I have work to do so I need to focus on that."

Bah ¬_¬

At 4/15/12 06:58 AM, Vincoid wrote:

I actually like that one, it's good. I also like the idea in your previous post. Don't worry about it being too romantic, that's just a risk you'll have to take. When it comes to risks, I share the same believe as Machiavelli did:

"Never was anything great achieved without danger."

King among men.
I'll let you know how it goes.
Thank you a hell of a lot!
:D

Also, I know she's going to have a lot of doubt or be skeptical about this because I said some awful things to her I'd never mean or intend.

So I need to try and draw her out of that mentality and mindset somehow, but I'm not quite sure what to say other than,
'I know you have some bad memories and doubts you're holding on to, I can't tell you to let go. I can only promise to do my best to paint over them'

Or something...better than that.

At 4/13/12 04:45 AM, Vincoid wrote:

I think you really should try honesty with her. However, there's a whole range of ways to express the truth. You could say she didn't date the real you.
Instead, you can also say that you didn't act like yourself, shut her out which didn't give the spark a chance to grow into a blinding flame, that you haven't treated her right and that you want to be a better man for her.
Tell her you're the one who screwed up, not just for you, but for her as well. Tell her you want to give it another chance, let her see how you really are so she can decide wether something's there or not.

Words are extremely powerful. You can keep things simple, convey your message and hope for the best. You can also give expression to your deeper emotions (simple or somewhat poetic) and make a connecting with her. Treat her like a woman, talk to her like she's a woman. You're not the one who needs to understand what you say, you already know that. She has to understand.

So let her know what was holding you back. Let her know you think it's your fault and you did her wrong. Make sure she knows you want to give it another chance, but not because you so desperately need it, but because you took away her chance of being happy with you by shutting her out, and you want her to be able to decide for herself how she feels. Give her the power and wait for her move.

And again, congrats on taking care of yourself! ;)

I'm looking forward to hearing how everything works out.

Thank you for that, that's really a plethora of useful stuff.

Well, she wanted a break over Easter because I got 'too much' for her to handle as a friend, so next week I'm going to invite her over to my room at University to hopefully tell her about my changes.

I'm going to explain to her that she was right to break up with me, because with my depression it wouldn't have lasted long, and then I need to explain to her that the reasons she broke up with me were due to my depression, this is purely so she doesn't feel guilty or bad about her instigating the break up.

As for the main explanation, my Counselor said that sometimes it works to play to my strengths, and seeing as I'm a creative individual, to do something along those lines.
When we'd started talking on facebook over the Xmas holidays, I used to send her stupid little mspaint pictures of ridiculous things. I'm thinking of doing a 'Love Actually' (I am a commercial hack) and writing what I want to say on paper, (in large writing obviously), putting some stupid drawings underneath, and just doing this for the 3 or 4 minutes it will take.
I was going to put music on, just to stop the silence being too much, so I remember her saying 'The Book of Love' by Peter Gabriel was her favourite song, my only worry is that may be too 'romantic', even though the dating never progressed because of a lack of romance on my end!

Bit of a long one I'm afraid.
Basically I've had bad depression and anxiety issues for the past 4 years, anyhoo I dated a girl for about 6 weeks earlier in the year, but she called it off due to 'the spark running out'. (I never told her about my issues while we were dating)
She said while dating she 'liked me far too much' and I was one of her favourite people at university.
I know this is because I didn't make an effort to alter dates or do something exciting.
I was nice but not romantic, I didn't say or act how I felt.
We talked every day and didn't give the spark room to breathe, we smothered it somewhat.
I know exactly how I should have and would have acted, but I never said or did things because I was held back by my depression, and it 'fogged over' my actual self (if that makes sense)

I told her afterwards that I had bad depression and anxiety issues for the past few years, which is why I reacted a bit more emotionally or over the top than she did.

The problem is, she didn't see the 'real me', or who I was. This was due to my depression and anxeity hindering myself or making me insecure and unconfident.
We've remained friends, but we've had a break for a month because I said some things that upset her. (Again, due to my depression making me a complete nutcase, I'm disgusted at myself, I didn't mean it)

The past month I've spent every day talking to a counsellor and doing mental exercises and techniques for at least 2 hours and whatnot to sort myself out, and I really do feel different. I really do feel like myself. I'm acting different and I'm taking back control slowly but at least somewhat.

I genuinely do feel like a different person, this is the main point here. And a lot of my friends have noticed and acknowledged this.

Consider it as if my old self was a terrible, rundown crappy car.
Currently I'm a newer model, but I've had to build it with some parts of the old one until I have time to replace them.

(If that tedious metaphor makes sense)

I'd love to ask her to give me a second chance on a date to see what I'm actually like, (although technically it'd be a first chance with the real me) although I'm not sure what to say.

Saying 'Oh you didn't actually date THE REAL ME' sounds so...patronising and facetious (even though it's true)
And whilst my depression was essentially why I caused her to break up with me, it sounds insulting to her, or as if I'm clutching at straws or being desperate (I'm not...seriously).

For the TL;DR crowd.
Had depression, girl didn't know and broke up with me
The reasons she broke up with me were because of my depression
I'm not as depressed, getting better.
Trying to get her to give the 'real me' a chance.

Any advice/war stories/tips/pointers?

At 12/21/11 08:21 PM, reverend wrote: Yeah, just to joke with him. :) But on topic I do occasionally so see what has been going on, see which thread were created already and such. Just to stay in the loop.

I missed that I'm afraid!
I genuinely would have found that funny and appreciated the irony.

If I go on the BBS, I find myself opening the most recent 3 or 4 pages and opening all the banned threads in separate tabs. 99% of the time it's because from past experience I've found that most have final mod posts that are pretty funny and good for a quick chuckle or so.

Anybody else do the same?

Not that I care. I'll cope.

I had a friend when I was about 10 years old who was one of those people who you think has autism or some genuine mental difficulty, but really was just a moron.
I went round his house once and he pretty much started fiddling with his zip and repeating "Don't look yet, don't look!".
This was during that sort of inane childish act where people would put their thumb through their zip and pretend it's a penis.
I figured he was doing this and just shrugged it off, when I turned around he'd got his penis through the zip and was flailing it around.
I promptly left and never spoke to him again.

He's now a cleaner at our old high school

For every 'Community' and 'Extras' we have this....

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xnc2QbRZs DM

I genuinely thought it was a parody at first, with the exaggerated questioning, arm movements and 'Tagline says something but then she does THE OPPOSITE!!' formula...

Stop doing this to yourself America...please.

We worry about you.

I remember that game 'The Ugly' used to scare me a few years ago...but I can't think of anything other than the 'loud noise and boo' scares.

I know about 4 Matthews, so surnames become commonplace.

But actual 'nicknames', I know a guy called paul who is tall...so people call him 'Tall Paul'.
....

Fuck I hate everybody...

I instantly have contempt for anybody who makes that fucking face.

I'm sure he has his.....reasons.

As a toy that just looks.....dull and uninteresting.

You're also obviously A CHILD.

An interesting idea, was quite nice but did get a bit tedious.
Speed it up a bit.

We need more than just an 'over 13' check for this forum....
We need to be a borderline Gestapo.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-asia-pac ific-12631143

RULE BRITANNIA.

The Wicker man

Yes.
Because human beings are intricate, with opinions.

I'm a massive QUEEN fan by the way, but that's beside the point.