Newgrounds.com — Everything, By Everyone.

Yea, like when you can fit your head between two bars, and then you have trouble getting it back through? There's that split second of "OHFUCKSHIT." Hopefully things work out, though.

Allow me to list some of the scarier moments in life, though:

-When the condom breaks
-When you nut in a girls mouth, and see her coming back up, attempting to kiss you
-When you're on a plane, and overhear the Captain say, "So how do I make the wheels go down on this sucker..."
(This actually happened to a friend of a friend)
-When you wake up in the morning in bed with a girl, and realize you have shit yourself overnight

Those are just a few, gentlemen.

Well, it's certainly creative, and definitely new. What can I say: the kids wanted to do a Harry Potter themed dance sequence, they did it. I wouldn't do it myself, but to each his own.

At least they did it well. It wasn't a crappy version. Although I'd like to see Andy Milonakis do his version.

CptWillard, I applaud your hilarious post. I love shit that doesn't make sense, and this surely doesn't make a whole lot of sense. If you have indeed tried any of these, disregarding the criminal ones, you have courage, man.

Keep posting new ideas, they keep getting better and better. Except I think my favorite was in the beginning with "Blam her". I fucking snorted with laughter at that one. Cheers, and keep up the good work.

At 9/23/05 11:51 AM, Mrman123 wrote: One way to describe the situation you are in now.. PWNED!

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Listen, earthquakes are not to be feared. Just duck and cover, young man. Duck and cover, or else the hooligans will steal your mothers flowers.

At 9/23/05 09:54 AM, Miigga wrote: What the fuck is RP??

Role Playing. We cut out the "G" (even though it technically is a game, but I digress...) to save people from confusion, because everyone classically relates the acronym "RPG" to things like Final Fantasy. What we do is entirely text-based. It's very cool. If you're just going to mock it, save your fingers. You'll just get carpal-tunnel earlier than you thought.

At 9/23/05 10:05 AM, Fyndir wrote:

At 9/23/05 09:57 AM, Lysaer wrote:

Like..?

I don't have the time to explain everything, but basically, if EVERYTHING was destroyed when the plane hit: How did the pilots passport remain intact so they could say the pilot was Arab/Persian?

There's documents from experts and architects stating that the towers could not have fallen if a plane had hit it. It would need to take much more cataastrophic structure damage from, say, a bomb or some missiles. They had weaponry aboard that plane, possibly C4. Loaded in by Uncle Sam.

And thirdly, I don't care WHAT you think: if you're not a trained airforce or airline pilot, those men would had to have been fucking airplane-flying prodigies to transfer their skills from a small dinghy plane to a fucking 747. No matter how many simulations you take, there is never anything like the real thing. And flying a plane is pretty real, so I hear.

Now I'm all flustered...

On the plus side, he could have a bitchin' cane. They could put a sword and gas and all types of shit in that. Plus, it would be a pimp cane. Ebony and ivory, with a gold handle. And a feather. A purple one.

Well, I would've told her that she's got a case of basic paranoia, and that the problem in New Orleans is simply a natural disaster. There may or may not be nanochips in vaccines, althoughly I highly doubt it. The best way to deal with crazies is to present your case in a straight-forward and logistical manner, without side-comments or jokes, which would allow them to pick apart your argument. Never insert a joke if you expect to be taken seriously by hardcore competition.

And if all that doesn't work, just shake your head and leave the room. That'll keep her up at night. Plus, then she'll think you're a spy. Remember to whisper into your sleeve when you see her.

Oh, but 9/11 was definitely an inside job. Way too much evidence points to that shit.

At 9/12/05 04:21 PM, -TheDoctor- wrote:

At 9/12/05 03:31 PM, Ecrew wrote: do you know what you are talking about?
cause no one else cares.

Yeah, it's one of those things where you really had to be there at the time.

I was there, man. I WAS THERE! Hoo-haa

Yes, I would love to start a comedy one, as well. So much material...so little time.

It's a pity there are still disgruntled 13-year olds posting on this, flaming innocent bystanders such as myself. But, as the good Doctor practices, blinders are the way to go.

And I'm not even gonna click on "Penisland" and find out why it isn't what it sounds like.

So I'll try e-mailing some of the heads that were thoroughly involved. We really had a good run with the last one.

Hello ladies and gentlemen

It is I, Sea-King Smuttynose LeChuck. First, to Lawrence, ElijahMoishe, Jean, Tacitacial, etc. I apologize for completely disappearing on the RP. However, I had started the summer, and it was difficult to remain focused on the RP when I had shit to do.

I am in college full-time now! No more working for me, I am back in action here in NYC. I am trying to get a job, and I already have a decent amount of classes, but I want to start another RP. Perhaps a joking one this time, like the house war. Or maybe like the Immortals one. Either way, I think this one should be set with many more limitations and less delusions of grandeur, so to speak.

I don't have the time to establish, or even begin to contemplate, a set of rules and guidelines that this new RP might go by. I have class in a minute, and I'm just distracted as all hell. However, I would like to think about it, and I encourage all of you to think about it as well.

I'm not even sure if you'll be reading this. I hope to try and contact each of you individually, as you were easily the most active participants.

I must run now, but I hope we can have as much fun as we did last year. I hope you're all well. Ciao

Sincerely,
That bloody pirate

*LeChuck hears Atomicus as he is speeding North*
Atomicus? Oh, I'm uh...somewhere up on the surface, not entirely sure where. Her, lemme send another ping...
*He once again pings with the crystal, allowing all holders to be aware of his position. Little does he know Jean is incommunicado beneath the ancient walls of the temple underground.*
If ya know my position, jus hea-OMIGOD
*He stops short, almost colliding with Bialetti and his 50 troops, spelling certain doom for any that would've been in his path. He brings himself down to the ground and gives an approving nod to Bialetti.*
"Well done, General. Yes, you're a General now. Things are getting real shitty down there, all types of Avatars and other-worldly activities...I think it's about time we evacuated and headed back to Tortuga. While I hate to say it, I believe Earth will be no more soon."

*LeChuck grunted and scratched his head, panting slightly from the exertion of destroying elementals with his bare hands*
"Fuck you, this is just as much my fight as it is yours. I ain't letting nothin destroy this here chunk a'dirt. I won't interfer against ye, but I'll use my judgment. Besides, I suppose our boys could use some assistance up top...."
*He moves to plow upwards through the Earth to the surface, but stops and turns to Jean.*
"Jean, I'm assumin' you'll be staying with Eli, and therefore at the main fight. If anything goes wrong, contact me immediately. I'll be there in a flash."
*With that he sped off out of the chamber, through the Earth, finally propelling himself to the surface. He came to an abrupt halt as he reached the surface, his eyes wide in shock. The planet was desecrated. Smoking craters and liquid magma had replaced most of the cities and what little nature had remained, artificial or not. LeChuck couldn't see any troops, and feared the worst...
He sped off to find Bialetti and what remained of the Elites...*

*Since the surface had been bombarded, Bialetti had ordered his men retreat from the outposts and head further and further down, where it would be a little more safe from the plasma blasts. Out of the almost 80,000 troops that had landed, only 200 remained. Bialetti looked over his men, and he saw some signs of exhaustion and fatigue. These men had been fighting all-out for almost a day straight, nearly 20 hours. This was taking all of their best abilities, and these men remaining were truly Elite. He almost smiled with pride, as he considered all of them his sons...He never had any family he could recall.*
"Alright men. The corporates still on this planet are dwindling and scattered. I want 3 parties of 50, each in a direction. The last 50 men, come with me. We have to find King LeChuck."
*A 'YES SIR!' arose from the group, and they split off, one group going East, one West, one North, and Bialetti and his men heading South. Little did they know, LeChuck was approaching from the South, and fast...*

At 4/19/05 10:18 AM, Tacitacial wrote: *With those last words, the Dark Avatar dissappears into smoke. He remains hidden for a few seconds until he reappear just behind LeChuck. His left arm has returned to normal and he grabs LeChuck's arms, pinning them both behind his back. A black shadow begins to crawl over LeChuck's skin from the Dark Avatar and pieces of his flesh begin to fall off.*

*LeChuck grits his teeth and sends a surge of shadow backlashing through the Avatars hands. Breaking free he shoots forward and spins around.*
"Ye can't use shadows on shadows, ye twit! An' while I may not destroy ye completly here, it's still fun rippin ye to pieces!"
*His flesh as fused back onto his arms and shoulders where they had fallen off before. He dodges various debris to his sides, and ends up on the right side of the Avatar. He quickly plants a fist in the side of his head, while at the same time swinging around towards the Avatars side with an extra long scythe that has now become his left hand.*

At 4/18/05 12:42 PM, Tacitacial wrote: Ignoring his wound, the Dark Avatar grabs both the lance as well as the harpoon and sends an electric current though the weapons.

*LeChuck quickly withdraws both the lance and harpoon, but not in time to completely avoid the shock. He is propelled backwards into the wall again from the electrical explosion that leaves the air itself burnt. As he goes flying towards the wall, he is stopped dead in his tracks by seemingly nothing. He growls and narrows his eyes. His hand suddenly transforms into a Megaman-esque hand cannon. He holds it steady as it begins to charge up, the air crackling around it, pure darkness gathering within. When he can barely contain it anymore, he unleashes it in blinding small doses. Hundreds of baseball-sized clumps of anti-light and acidic blackness come hurtling at the Dark Avatar.*

*As LeChuck neared Dorian with his saber pointed, he was suddenly hit with many Ancients flowing into him. His eyes went wide as he was sent sideways, his course completely altered. With his concentration thoroughly disturbed, the lassos of shadows shattered in the air, dispersing into nothing. He was driven into a stone wall 40 feet away*
"YAH DAMN FOOLS, GERROFF ME!"
*He was still fuming as they charged his soul and vessel-body; he was somewhat oblivious to all this, due to his overpowering temper and rage. He slashed and hacked at the air, infuriated that the Ancients had chosen that particular moment to not only leave their imprisonment, but to completely throw off his attack. The black dot on his stomach began growing in size, taking over his flesh and soaking him black. He paused a moment in his torrent of invectives to observe his physical mutations. A sad look came across his face for but a fleeting moment as he thought to himself.
Christ, I'm a damned freak now...
*As the last of the Ancients flew into him, he fell back down to the ground, landing on one foot and one knee, his silver cutlass, which was now black, lay in front of him. His entire body, including his eyes, were jet black. He snarled as he grabbed his cutlass from the ground, slightly unstable groupings of shadow and pure black magic erupting from him. He growled, and the earth behind him crumbled a little. A piece of rock came loose above him, falling a short distance towards his head. From his shoulder burst a lash of shadow, slicing through the rock in a barely visible tornado. The rock was turned to dust as it lightly rained down on him. LeChuck looked up and raised both eyebrows.*
"Well, that was impressive...uh, thanks" He felt odd thanking his shoulder. He shook his head and dodged as more earth was being disturbed by the two shockwaves having met head-on but moments ago. He turned his attention back to Dorian, who was about to have both Jean and Eli upon him. LeChuck reached back smiled, and suddenly screamed in terror as he realized that not only had his cutlass disappeared, but his arms had just turned into harpoons. He stared in awe...slowly, they morphed back to his arms and hands. He watched as he wondered where his cutlass had gone...and a moment later it appeared in his hand. he thought about having two...and suddenly a second appeared in his other hand. He smiled to himself as he thought of harpoons again, with massive hooks.*
"YYYYAAAAARRRRRRRRGGGG!!!" He screamed as he rushed with one harpoon and one lance extended towards Dorian.*

At 4/15/05 11:27 AM, Tacitacial wrote: Dark Avatar: "I know where to go now. I have found the way to Korriban. Can you stop me? Blast my fleet out of the sky and I will find a way to get there. So, can you kill me? Can you defeat me, even in these ruins?"

*LeChuck roared and brought his foot crashing down in response, sending his own shockwave. The two met in the middle, causing the ground to erupt in a shower of stone and earth. Through the mess LeChuck charged with his cutlass pointed straight at the Dark Avatar, a beam of shadow firing ahead of it, lassoing it's arms and legs together.*
"Aye, we can kill ye! Jus' hold still an TASTE THE CHROME!"

*Bialetti's raises an eyebrow*
"Promotion? Okay..."
*He watches as the 100 Jovian Elites cease their bloodlust and begin attacking the corporates alongside him.*
"That's better..."
*He watches Atomicus depart out of the corner of his eye and continues fighting, intent on obeying his leiges commands.*

*LeChuck follows Jean, zooming behind him. Keeping in his playful spirits, regardless of whatever scenario, LeChuck zooms past Jean and sticks his tongue out as he passes. He lets out a laugh as he just spots Eli zoom upwards into the rooms, following 'Dorian'. LeChuck bares his teeth and follows, coming up through the hole, landing behind Eli. From seemingly nowhere, his golden cutlass appears, but now it is silver. He runs his hand along the side of the blade.*
"Finally, the two are melded..." he says quiely to himself. Playfully tossing the blade hand to hand, faint wisps of shadow trail the blade as it blows a soft blood-red. He grins.*
"Alright, ye otherworldy bastard. Time to get the fuck off my planet." He says as he advances slowly behind Eli, Jean not far behind.

*LeChuck freezes in his tracks*
Atomicus? Oh thank god...I'm completely fucking lost, but I'm zooming around the earth. I swear I've circled it five times. I ha--wait a sec...hold on a minute...oh okay, nevermind. I found 'em. My cane is vibratin' more an more against my leg, long story. Anyhoo, I'll report back to ya in a sec when I figure out where I am exactly. Say, you don't happen to know where a commander of mine by the name of Bialetti is, do ya? Odds are he'll be one of the last chaps you'll see standing, most likely wielding 2 refined plasma blades? If ya see him, tell him he's promoted to General. And to eliminate the remaining corporates and start securing what's left on the surfaces. Something tells me he and his men won't do shit against this Avatar, and if we can stop him, we'll need Earth replenished as much as possible. Sorry to relay these through you, but as odd as it sounds, I don't have time to zoom to him and back, I'd get completely lost all over again. Good to hear from you, mate. Get back to ya in a sec...

*LeChuck kept his hand on his cane as he felt it vibrating more and more. He dove down into the ground, and immediately took a boulder-sized chunk of debris ot the face. He stumbled back, losing his balance in the small tunnel, but Jean quickly caught and righted him. After clearing his head, he zoomed slightly ahead of Jean and turned to face him, with his back to the debris, creating a safety umbrella and destroying chunks Eli was missing or ignoring. He had to shout to be heard over the constant crashing and crushing of rock and earth.*
"JEAN! WHERE ARE WE GOING?!"
*As he finished the sentence, he communicated back to Atomicus.*
Atomicus, I'm in some makeshift underground tunnel, following the Avatars trail to...someplace, dunno where. I'm gonna send you a pulse through the crystal, it'll feel weird in your head, but you'll know where to go.
*LeChuck sent out the ping-like pulse to Atomicus, simultaneously sending ones out to all recipients of the crystal. Jean was right there, but Zanzibar and Lawrence now knew where they were as well.*

*Bialetti turned to Atomicus and showed the faint trace of a smile.*
"Thanks. Makes things much easier from here."
*Some of the Corporate soldiers had lessened in their attack frenzy now that the Avatar was getting farther and farther away, his influence slowly dimishing. It was still present, but some found themsevles suddenly confused, providing easy targets for a master gunman. Bialetti had sheathed his blades for two highly automatic rifles, blasting corporate after corporate.*

At 4/8/05 06:59 AM, Tacitacial wrote: The Dark Avatar sends a quick short pulse of energy into the Earth that seeks out LeChuck to grab him and to strike at him. The Dark Avatar takes a small moment to send a telepathic message to him.*

*As LeChuck speeds through the earth, suddenly he experiences an odd sensation. He freezes and listens, or rather....feels. Is this Atlas's power? He narrows his eyes as whatever he is sensing gets closer and closer, moving at lightning quick speeds. he turns just in time to see a metaphysical "lasso" coming at him. He grits his teeth and catches it in his hands as it seeks to ensnare him. Attempting to break it, it begins it's long journey back. LeChuck is well aware of who sent this probe.*
"Mother.......fucker....." He grunts as he exerts himself, his neck muscles bulging as he pulls with all his might. For all his otherwordly strength, he senses he is just inches shy of the strength necessary to break said trap.*
*Something ignites in the back of his mind. His eyes burn as he unleashes a primal scream, the power of Atlas coming through his arms, shooting through his hands to the fingers that clutch the unseen snare. With a final twist, he snaps it's grip on him, it dispersing into thin air. He pauses. He had been dragged back nearly halfway. He turns to go, but flashes a grin as he contemplates his own move.*
"Can't let you have all the gun..." He mutters as he turns and pumps himself up. He gathers his strength up, and focuses as he raises each foot and brings it crashing down into the earth, each time sending a massive shockwave towards Dorian. With each pound his steps get harder and harder, the cracks in the earth growing larger and larger. His speed quickens, and soon he has caused multiple splits in the earth. His speed quickens yet again, and soon he has almost affected the tectonic plates themselves.*
*After but a minute more, the desired effect comes: a massive earthquake. The earth splits in a massive cracking, the ground shaking at levels way off the Richter Scale. He keeps up his steps a little longer, finally stopping when he himself loses his balance. He quickly grabs his leg again.*
Jean, be careful. I've just sent a rather sizeable earthquake heading towards you. Perhaps if we can sink Dorian into the center of the earth. Would the nickel core destroy him? Or at least his physical form? Is that hot enough? Just a thought.....but still, this thing is fucking huge. Where I'm at, it's almost 600 yards across. Be ready.
*He turns once more and speeds off in a different direction, still not sure what he is seeking. He grabs his leg once more, now soaring above ground.*
Zanzibar, what the fuck? Get yer ass down here mate. Hurry up with Nobunaga and help us handle this Dorian creep.

(Jean, I think I gave you a crystal a while back, so that we could communicate anywhere no matter what. On that assumption...)

*LeChuck jumps out of the toxins range, and is relieved when Jean redirects it so it would do no harm. He looked at 'Dorian' and Lawrence battling, and suddenly Dorians words came to his mind. He narrowed his eyes and thought to himself, brewing an idea....he put his hand to his leg and contacted Jean, who was merely 40 feet away, but he still preferred the safest means of communication.*

Jean, did you hear him? He said "I can sense you two, immortals." He knows you're here. If he hasn't seen me yet, can he sense me? If not, I think this could work seriously in our favor....However, I've been watching them, and am hard-pressed to find something I could do to him that Lawrence couldn't that might cause any damage at all. He's too powerful for my cane, and I fear that even if I punched him across the galaxy all day, he'd still be alright. I'm going to disappear into the floor, see if I can find anything that might help us, who knows. If you can think of a way I might be of secretive use, let me know.

*With that, LeChuck immediately sank out of view into the earth. He sped off in a random direction, hoping to find something....anything...that might help them.*

At 4/7/05 12:49 AM, Atomicus wrote: Atomicus: "Need some help? I'm a friend of LeChuck's and Zanzibar's"

*Bialetti jerks his head around in the direction of the voice. He sees Atomicus and quickly nods, speaking quickly as he turns his head back around in time to deflect a plasma blast back at it's owner.*
"Yes. What news?"
*He loses one of his swords as a Jovian cuts off his hand. He screams, more in rage than pain, and dropping his other sword, reaches down to pick up a large rock and beats the Jovian to death with it in a matter of 3 hits to the face. He picks up the blade again, and by that time his hand had regrown completely. He flexed it once before recovering his second blade and continuing the seemingly endless battle.*

*From the air comes a small shape plummeting towards the earth. It is not noticed, since things falling from the sky has become rather common place lately, and this was much smaller than the last incoming object. However, this one is trailed by yelling....sounding like cursing....*
*The object slams into the earth, digging a few hundred feet into the ground nearby Jean and Eli, farther away from 'Dorian' and Lawrence/Gaia. Muffled cursing can be heard, and LeChuck appears out of the ground next to Jean a moment later, dislodging a sizeable chunk of granite from his ribcage. He spits on the ground and crushes the granite in his hands.*
"I fucking hate crash landings."
*He notices....and can feel...the power emanating from the two fighting, and his eyes widen.*
"Jesus.....I can practically feel the battle from here. I'm guessing those are Avatars..."
*LeChuck's eyes narrow, since Avatars were the next closest things to the Ancients, before the Authority himself. Satan had lost interest in them a hundred years or so back; Syrus had assured them of that. But they had no idea what the Authority might be up to, or even if he still had his eye on this dimension. LeChuck could hardly fathom fighting an Avatar. It would be like fighting multiple Ancients at once, which he had not attempted either. He looked at both Jean and Eli a moment.*
"So, what's our plan of action? And don't nobody be tryin' nothin heroic. These fucks mean business, and I'll be damned....again, before I sit back and watch. Eli," he turned his attention on him. "Yer changed. I heard somethin' about Horace? Horath? Somethin', whats he got ta do with this?"

*Bialetti spies Lusankya hurtling towards them.*
"Oh Jesus..."
*He makes sure he is out of the way of it's path when it impacts. After it has created the sizeable hole, Bialetti looks down to see two beings fighting. He squints, and realizes one of them is that fellow he saw calmly walking the battlefield. He watches as lightning and the elements seem to be obeying them as they battle. He frowns.*
"Those two are very abnormal."
*He looks around for Mensk, but seeing no sign of him, goes back to slicing and dicing Jovians and Corporates.*

Meanwhile (I forget where LeChuck is) LeChuck is fighting and being a pirate.

(Sorry, I recently failed a midterm. Bad news, bvut I am still in the RP! I'm also sick right now. Give me time. Sorry anyone that was interacting with me)

At 3/24/05 12:41 PM, -TheDoctor- wrote: Lawrence: I must remain here for the time being. You of all people should understand, a captain goes down with his ship... or something like that. Anyway, I don't plan on going down just yet. You should get back to the battle, I can handle things here

*LeChuck grinned and laughed, although it was silent laughter. He nodded and touched his leg.*
Aye, aye, but of course. How silly of me. Well mate, do what ye must. Just dont be an ass and get yourself killed.
*LeChuck gave one final nod to Lawrence and jumped back off into space. He just barely dodged a Corporate fighter, and snarled as he shot back to the Widowmaker. He got back on the bridge and shivered once a moment.*
"Brrr, space is cold. Captain, get us a safe distance away from the Instigator. I've got a feeling Lawrence is going to do something interesting before that hunk of junk goes entirely..."
*The Captain affirmed, and the ship moved a safe distance away from the Instigator, keeping their firing rate up steadily on the Corporate fleet. Trokojh's giant MS guns were firing single, massive spikes into Nobunaga's fleet, taking out large ships with every shot. There were still hundreds, but every one less was one less cause for worry. At'Poth himself was in his personal fighter squadron (think Darth Vader), running amok in the dogfight, adding more notches on his metaphorical belt.*

*The Widowmaker dodges and flies through the enemy fleet, LeChuck personally flying the ship. The Jyeets were now fully engaged with the OWCA and Nobunaga's fleet, and Trokojh was leading the attack. Thanks to it's unique deflective armor, it had taken little damage compared to the amount it was dealing out. But it was a steady stream, and as much as the Jyeets would like to believe it, the ship was not invincible. While it could sustain much more damage, LeChuck knew it would only be a matter of time before it was destroyed. Still, it was blasting Nobunaga's fighters relentlessly. The Widowmaker shook as it took a hit.*
"Dammit!" LeChuck cursed.
Tech: Sir, we've got a problem
"What?!" LeChuck spun on the man, grinding his teeth. The man gulped and quickly wiped his brow before continuing.
Tech: Lawrence....his...his ship is all but destroyed
"What?" LeChuck's voice was slightly quieter, but more distressed. The soldier moved back so LeChuck could peer into their 'telescope' fixture that had a man constantly scanning the battlefield with computers and various other machines. LeChuck could see the Instigator slowly disintegrating in space, and he zoomed in as it spun from taking a large hit in the side, seeing Lawrence grasping to some debris, as the vacuum of space sucked all the air from the ship. He gasped.
"Shit! Frommer, take the wheel (old habits die hard)! I've got to go get him."
Capt: But sir, you'll be flying right into the fray. The Instigator has become a primary OWCA target. They're turning more and more guns on it by the second. I don't think it'll be there much lo--
*LeChuck was at the man's throat, just barely restraining himself from snapping his neck.
"Then I'd better be fast, eh?"
*The Captain quickly nodded. LeChuck let him go and shot off through the wall. He sped through space, dodging plasma blasts and anti-matter alike, reaching the Instigator quickly. He landed next to Lawrence, and the suction was not so bad anymore as almost all the air had been sucked out. They just had to hold on to not get knocked around by blasts, and to keep themselves rooted, what with no gravity and everything. LeChuck clapped his hand on Lawrence's shoulder and started shouting. Immediately, he slapped his hand to his forehead. Lawrence simply looked at him with a slight smile. LeChuck growled and dug into his boot. He brought out a crystal and showed it a moment to Lawrence before draping it over his neck. He grabbed his leg a second later.*
Fucking christ, I'm right here and I've gotta use this crap....you're in a tight spot, mate. Yer whole crew is gone, and I'm not quite sure why you're not yet gone either. This tub is done for, she'll be scrap in a few minutes. Grab hold of my shirt and come aboard the Widowmaker, mate. It's your last choice unless ye wanna go solo against a Sun-Crusher
*LeChuck grabbed onto the railing and awaited Lawrence's response. Hopefully he would be quick about it, since the ship was being slowly decimated.*
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
----------------------
*Bialetti noticed the automated guns turning on and heard the mechanical voice speaking. He instantly knew this was an enemy. He didn't have any family members on the battlefield, and he was damn sure Mensk didn't have any, either. He cursed to himself and spoke into his radio.*
"Alpha Delta, Beta Delta, focus all fire on those automated guns! I want as many of those things destroyed before they start adding to the firefight!"
*Two squads consisting of 20 men each began effectively moving throughout the field, setting charges at each installment, and blowing them at safe distances. There were many guns, but each one that was destroyed was one less automated enemy.*
*Bialetti took a plasma blade through the leg, and he barked in rage as he beheaded the Jovian behind him. He fought wounded for a moment before his leg could heal. He was suddenly caught off balance as he felt the overwhelming presence of thousands of Immortals...*
What the Hell...
*His moment was disrupted by several primitive spears and swords coming his way, and he deftly dodged them, fighting on, having no idea what was going on up in space.*

Guess who's back...

*LeChuck caught the jug of Poison and moved to drink it, but froze before the bottle reached his lips. He sighed and slowly lowered the bottle*
"Shite, am I insane? I can get drunk now...I can't drink before a fight, christ...."
*LeChuck threw the bottle back to Atomicus and took his Captains seat on the Widowmaker. He started barking out orders, and he noticed Lawrence's fleet assisting the EWCA fleet, and the sight of the Dark Avatars' combined fleets was a sight to behold. He got on the radio and ordered the nearest technician to find Lawrence's frequency without allowing it to be intercepted or he'd have his head. Lucky for that technician he was in the zone on that day...LeChuck promoted him and got on the line.*
"Lawrence, you old dog, listen up. I've gotten some strange reports of corporate forces and Jovians suddenly teaming up behind Dorian, so something tells me he's either become insanely magical, or that's not Dorian. How are you holding up against Nobunaga? We've got some reinforcements on the way."
*Behind him, At'Poth let out another high-pitched hissing aka laughter, and clutched his drying pot-belly. He spoke into his radio, and a large fleet became visible behind the Widowmaker. About 50,000 modified Jyeet Darts, with improved armor and better weapons, as well as 10 capital ships, and the massive Jyeet flagship in the cube shape, Trokojh; It had been newly named after the first one had been destroyed in a battle between the Jyeets and the now-extinct Pogs. Damn suicidal freaks...*
*LeChuck got on the radio again.*
"Bialetti, give me a status report NOW"
*A crackled response came back moments later.*
"Sir, we've lost contact with Major Bialetti several hours ago. As far as we know, he's now several levels below the surface with an EWCA commander by the name of Mensk. From our most recent report, about 40 minutes ago, they're still alive, but encountering much heavier resistance since the Corporates and Jovians have somehow allied."
*LeChuck clenched his teeth and gurgled.*
"WELL FIND HIM!" He screamed
"Yes Sir" and the radio cut off.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------
----------------

*Down on Earth, several levels below the surface, Bialetti and what remained of his team of Elites were surrounded by holding their own. They had been able to set up a mobile cannon, and had a stable perimeter of plasma shields and automatic shotguns with HI (Highly Incendiary) rounds, with a touch of modern alchemy that produced a poisonous gas when it contacted skin. Now having been pretty far separated from Mensk, Bialetti had deemed it safe to use the gas. Each soldier had on personal gas masks, so the corporates were dropping with much higher efficiency. The Jovians, however, were not as affected by the gas. They had to be directly hit by the rounds to be killed. Bialetti himself was away from the group, slashing and dodging with his dual plasma blades and his own personal super-heated boomerang. He could only catch it with one hand, and it took a while to charge up to the 1000 degrees of heat, but the throw went a distance and the heat destroyed most things it came within 3 feet of. Bialetti had been trying to find Mensk again so he could move his troops. While their position was a good one, with a little physical cover left from some destroyed buildings, it would be prudent of them to move at this point. Perhaps drop a small concentrated bomb to clear a path first. He contemplated all this as he continued to cut and slash through Jovians and Corporates alike.*

Sorry guys, I've been extremly busy with work and school, and I have to leave to make a delivery in a minute, bu t I have a plea to extend:

-The Doctor-, if you could PLEASE respond to my e-mail, I would be eternally grateful. I don't need much man, it's only a 5 page paper. I know, lame, but I still need something from you. A (decent) sentence or two from you ion response to each question would be perfect. If you don't reply at all, Im fucked. On that note...

If the good doctor does not find the time to reply, is anybody else interested in giving me some quotes regarding the creation of a character/s in a sci-fi/fantasy setting? If so, let me know

fishsticks@gmail.com

and just say that you want the interview questions, I would be glads to forward them to you. I need at LEAST two people, and I was hoping erither Tacitacial or Atomicus could be the other person. Yea, I don't remember if Ive exactly gotten around to getting the info from you chaps quite yet, but if I dont get quotes from SOMEONE, I will fail this class. I cannot do that.

So at this point I am open to anyone. Diggerdude, Baderact, ElijahMoishe; I dont fucking care. SOMEONE please save my ass, and my grade. E-mail the above mentioned e-mail "hi, ill answer your questions" Ill reply and send you them.

I don't feel good about interrupting the RP, but it's been slow lately and this is an act of desperation. Please....I'm begging someone.

At 3/7/05 04:42 PM, Baderact wrote: Sitting down he lit his. "LeChuck I see you've recognized these. Its them, the PR Platinum cigars. I figured now is better time than ever to whip out our best cigars... I imagine you remembered my formal battle gear if we are about to battle a being far stronger than we have ever faced... right?"
Zanzibar put his feet up and watched the screen of Earth. They were still a distance away, but they could see the lights around it. It would have been beautiful and serene if it wasn't for the fact they were watching their men die by the hundreds, as their ships exploded in the loneliness of space.

*LeChuck grunted and jerked his head in the direction of a locker on the side of the wall.*
"Yer craps in there. Had the latest reinforcements bring it over once I learned just exactly what it was we're up against."
*LeChuck paused and took a moment to light and enjoy the coveted cigars. There were only about 20 left, and he hadn't had one in 30 years. And now that he could once again taste things, it was absolutely divine. He took several deep puffs, and let the smoke out that created a dense cloud around his head. He waved his hand in front of his face to disperse the smoke as his eyes began to water slightly.*
"Ack, I never missed the eye-burning....lord.....*cough*"
*He caught his breath and cleared his throat, returning to enjoying his cigar slowly.*
"Allright ladies, we are heading back into the fray. My newly acquired prize ship seems to be all but decimated, and while she most likely won't make it through the battle, she'll last till the end. Our fleet is being diminished as well, but I've called all our spareable reinforcements from Tortuga, and..."
*He grinned. Zanzibar looked at him puzzledm then slowly smiled himself, and began to laugh.*
Zanzibar: No, you're joking! They're coming? Are they here?
*LeChuck was still grinning when a door opened behind him. They could hear the door open, not see it, as the area behind LeChuck was enveloped in shadows. There was the sound of two footsteps, but they were very quiet, and almost a little wrinkly...
*From behind LeChuck a scaly hand came to rest on the back of his seat. Zanzibar smiled wider as At'Poth, the Jyeet High Priest and Emperor, stood before them in full battle gear. He reached up to his head and punched a few buttons, then waited a moment as his speech equipment and translator came online.*
At'Poth: It is good to see you again, Zanzibar. It has been centuries since we have lost fought alongside one another. I look forward to our peoples destroying this great evil that has invaded our universe.
*Zanzibar smiled and greeted At'Poth with a handshake. It was not the traditional Jyeet greeting, but At'Poth had learned it was the most socially acceptable among homosapiens and related species. LeChuck almost burst out laughing, as Zanzibar and At'Poth stood nearly at the same height. At'Poth noticed, and a high-pitched hissing emitted from his face mask. Some of the others were slightly alarmed, but LeCHuck quickly explained that was the Jyeet laugh.*
At'Poth: Zanzibar, it appears you have shrunk many sizes. How strange it is for me to be able to now look you in the eyes as we meet face to face. And LeChuck, he is a mountain now. You must have to explain this to me in time.
Zanzibar smiled slyly and glanced at LeChuck, who was still enjoying the compliment.*
Zanz: Yes, well....we'll tell you later indeed,
*LeChuck clapped his hands and rose to his feet.*
"Ladies, gentlemen, lizards and Jyeets. We are here."
*They looked outside to see themselves practically back in the middle of the fray. It would be moments before either they fired, or were fired upon.*

At 3/7/05 02:34 PM, Baderact wrote: Zanzibar smiled as he took a seat in the back of the cabin. "So, the final battle is begining. LeChuck what are we doing?"
Zanzibar played with a knife as the ship shot towars Earth.

*LeChuck took a seat across from Zanzibar, thoughts racing in his mind.*
"Well, right now we've got.....some 5 millioin troops on Earth. The Elite, but I don't know how many have been cut down by the 40 million or so Jovians. And last I heard, that Avatar just headed to the surface as well, which does NOT bode well for anybody. I don't know how to stop an angel..."
*He paused, wondering why he had just called the Avatar an angel. He felt as if he had....known one? FOught one? He was unsure of the relation, but he knew he somehow had dealt with an Avatar before...and lost.*
"I don't think weapons and guns will help us that much against them. Thank Blackbeard I've got this..." LeChuck said as he lifted the cane from his belt. "It'll be a lifesaver during any melee's. We need to get back into the fight and head down to Earth, since that seems that everything is happening down there. Any objections?"

At 3/5/05 12:24 PM, Dark_Raven_LF wrote: they are cool, nice and smooth rock. it's kind of a wide range of types inside the music which I like. I wonder if they need a manager?

Ha, I don't believe so. But you should check out! Join their website and/or mailing list, and maybe even buy their CD. I guarantee you that you will not regret buying "You and Me", the LP. 14 tracks of pure goodness.

Ahoy fellow Newgroundians! Lysaer here, and I've got some fresh new shit for ya ears.

Open Hand, a HOT new band out of Cali, is sweeping the nation, currently touring with The Juliana Theory and Zao. They will soon be hitting up the UK with My Chemical Romance, which I bet you'd like to see if you're a limey. But guess what? All the shows are already sold out, so I hear through the grapevine. Sorry chaps. But hey! I could be wrong. If you are just dying to get your grubby little hands on some tickets, check out their website and get the skinny.

But! I bring you links to their music and videos. If you like indie rock with good vocals and amazing guitar, then you have GOT to hear/see these. All these links will open in new windows, so don't get your panties in a bunch about losing that post your about to put up about rotten milk being healthier than people think. Rock!

"Tough Girl" quicktime video
"You and Me" Ecard, their latest album. Contains 2 songs, "Pure Concentrated Evil" and "Tough Girl"
"In Your Eyes" quicktime video
"Life As Is" mp3

Well kiddos, enjoy the good tunes! I saw them at Irving Plaza in NYC not but a week ago, and they rocked the house. I saw their t-shirts and CD's going like hot - nay, boiling - cakes. Get 'em while they're scalding!