Posts by ForceApplied

2 Forum Posts by "ForceApplied"

Response to: How bad is my story? Posted June 1st, 2014 in Writing

Definitely needs a bit of work. The wording/grammar is poor, the dialogue is a tad dry. The characters need some description too. And I mean more than a proper introduction- which you also left out. However it does have potential so, don't be discouraged!

Response to: Where Gerbils Go To Die. Posted June 1st, 2014 in Writing

I came here expecting something... a lot sillier. Now I'm sad. But, it was still enjoyable. Though, I do agree, a few lines felt a bit awkward or forced.