Newgrounds.com — Everything, By Everyone.

don't think I've whored this picture quite enough. After all, it hasn't been on THIS thread. :P

At 2/11/08 01:37 AM, Jigen wrote: I need to get up in 5 hours and I can't sleep. Any idea how I get myself to sleep?

Valerian Root makes me itch and I ran out of Melatonin.

/

K you need to be REALLY confident in your masculinity to do this but...

Read a book......

Wait!!!!

While soaking in a hot bath....

GAH!!!1

Well my name is the combination of Kublai Khan, the great mongol Ruler, and using it as referencing to the new changing technologically empowered, web-based empire by putting an E in front of the name like E-Mail!!! Haha! just a little joke about how kings are made from all mediums of reality!!! HAHAHA!!

......... lol?

Please use an epic solo pleading showtune style for this! Tap your shoes three times and repeat these words: "I am Michael Bolton"

I'm a Slave to the Mathroom

Some nights I lie awake
With numbers still in my head
And no matter how hard I try to shake... them.
They stay long after I go to bed.

So tell me I am insane
For standing in the rain
But for me I know it's right
For me I know it's different
The numbers are to blame
For the answer I cannot name

Oooh!

I'm a slave to the mathroom!
It must be my fate, to calculate
Oh when will I be free from my TI-83?
Who knows if my brain has room to be crammed
With another parallelogram?

Ooh yes!

I'm a slave to the mathroom!
It must be my fate to calculate
Oh when will I be free from my TI-83
Who knows if I can solve the quadratic
While my head is filled with static?

I have a prayer
To the gods and goddesses of math above
I pray to forget trig and geometry,
And A squared plus B squared equaling C

I know now I'm not out of time
To know the slope of my line
My Destiny has come, it's here
Destiny is here, it's different
And then I will change time and space
My TI's memory all erased!

Ooh

I'm a slave to the mathroom!
It must be my fate, to calculate
Oh when will I be free from my TI-83?
Adding up the years til my day of dying
I realize my problems have been multiplying!

Ooh yes!

I'm a slave to the mathroom!
It must be my fate, to calculate
Oh when will I be free from my TI-83?
To subtract my suffering had been my vision
While all along MY SOUL had been in division

Oh!

I'm a slave to the mathroom!
It must be my fate to calculate
Oh when will I be free from my TI-83?
I've lost the love I had for math
I guess I walk another path...

Yes, I guess I'll walk another path...

At 2/9/08 02:03 PM, Crev wrote: a little something I made a while back

wow nice work. I like the dirty feel

I just made this for some practice, just not to lose sight of mixing discipline with creativity

At 2/4/08 11:17 PM, Lapsus-Angelus wrote:

6'2" 197 well toned frame(I bench about 300) and I do have a happy trail

WAIT WAIT!! Hold the show! I think I've found something. God we've all been so blind. Say that again would you. Just the last part

and I do have a happy trail

well there you have it, she wasn't staring at your junk at all. Now hurry, grab a razor before you start getting hairy creases in your six pack. I guarantee you she didn't even notice your cock.

At 2/5/08 01:21 AM, hammerhead84 wrote: I've been noticing lately in my country, America, that we as a nation lack coolness. Here's why

UK = Cool (It just is OK?)
Japan = Cool (Most high-tech country btw + Politeness + FUN)

actually the most high tech countries are Estonia and South Korea, Japan just manufactures cars and mario

China = Cool (Background Culture = Awesome)

Yes and they loved it so much they decided to destroy it all in the cultural revolution

Australia = Cool (Steve Irwin. I'm guessing alot of people there are like that. Also the aborigineese)

steve irwin is a good point. but he's dead now. As a result, all the kangaroos, koalas, and wallabys will be poached. Then what will Australia have going for it? Sunburn?

Africa = Cool (You can get the AIDS there. There's also alot of wildlife and such)

You can get the AIDS anywhere, and usually its not that cool to get. True about the wildlife, but unlike the U.S they don't respect the wildlife they have left.

Mexico = Cool (Fireworks Oh My. There's also Mexican food which is delicious)

Can't drink their water, and they don't sell soap anywhere, nuff said.

Jerusalem = Cool (It's a holy city)

So is Salt Lake City and Green Bay

Canada = Cool (Maple Syrup and Free Healthcare)

Unfortunately, the guy who get diabetes from teh maple syrup have to wait in line forever to see the doctor.

At 2/4/08 09:25 PM, Cross666 wrote:

At 2/4/08 09:23 PM, EKublai wrote: Respond if this means anything to you.

Come on man you know better than to make a steam-piled shit.

Or do I? I think it's time for you to look into the mirror of life and ask yourself, "Why did I just do that?"

Respond if this means anything to you.

At 2/4/08 07:31 PM, TheBigLemon wrote:

At 2/4/08 07:27 PM, LeeJaySan wrote: Wow! Lucky you! Enjoy being an uncle then, dude! I'm dealing w/ 2 6 year old nieces!

I am excited now, but something tells me a few weeks after living with her I'll be ready for some baby murder.

She's so precious though! Barely made a peep all day!

Is she still breathing!?

oh yes, and don't linger on the first question!

At 1/31/08 12:30 AM, cybernet213 wrote:

At 1/31/08 12:20 AM, piegodproductions wrote:

Q: Do you love me?

A: no you only give 7 licks

Q: how many fat chicks does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A:___________________________

A: 0. Their fingers are too fat.

Q: What is love?
A: __________________________

A: I don't know, but it's something that hurts

Q: How many times have you said "Don't tase me bro!"

A: ______________________

At 1/31/08 02:37 PM, doberman7 wrote: Facebook = for sad fags, people with no lives, etc...

just because people use it... A lot... doesn't mean it's stupid. This isn't a knock on Newgrounds because they already know this, but being on NG and talking to people you don't know says that you don't have a life more than talking to people you do know on facebook.

This is about asking questions about shit you don't know, and answering questions about shit you do know. These should be simple answers and questions that can't just be googled. You answer the question, then ask your own.

GO!

Q: What is your favorite color?

A: _____________

At 1/30/08 09:36 PM, Tsuchinoko wrote:

At 1/30/08 09:29 PM, EKublai wrote: paper bag? R u serial!? lol!

This proves that your sign up date doesn't change your IQ.

roffles tsuchinoko! Roffles!

Fo' sho tho, some of these suggestions are slammin'!

paper bag? R u serial!? lol!

Okay so I'm going to this dance, and it's supposed to be very formal. You know, black jacket, western business attire, etc. Well, me being the feisty, sprightly, young rebel that I am, I am planning on whering all NEON to the dance. Problem is, is that I haven't been able to get to my local Urban Outfitters so I don't actually have any neon clothing.

Is there some alternative I can use. Do some clothes act like neon/glow in the dark. I have a few brightly colored things. Maybe that will do. If you have any experience in the matter, PLEASE!!!

At 1/30/08 04:42 PM, lavalampa wrote: It will never be legal.

1) Its abused and leads to other addictions, such as crack, and LSD.
2) It kills brain cells, there are already enough stupid people in the world, and LSD.
3) Bill Clinton puffed on the magic dragon and look at us now! We have had a crack head in office for 8 years, and LSD.

See where I'm going with this, and LSD?

and LSD

i have a feeling that you're not actually serious about that.

But I say it should stay illegal, I don't want another way for kids to kill themselves in car crashes

Kids (Bad Drivers) + Weed = Dead

I have no idea whether weed would be used as a substitute for alcohol or as an intensifier, but in all probability, car crashes would rise because people are damn stupid.

yay for number #695600!

that's me!

At 1/27/08 06:56 PM, SirTwitchy wrote: what does NSFW mean?

obviously it means Never Shave Fuzzy Women

not safe for work

did it for the lulz

At 1/21/08 06:22 PM, Penquin11 wrote: lol this looks like a fun game mind if i join?

Don't cha just love relevant humor?

You are about to be fucked by the long dick of the law. I assume all of you have guns and crack.

At 1/20/08 08:00 PM, Hedwick wrote: Well marriage is the union of lovers, and was originally a religious thing. I really don't have anything to say to that other than any atheist who marries is no atheist.

I think you're getting Atheism mixed up with pure Irreligion. While the two are asscociated, Atheism means that you don't believe in a creator who still holds sway today. Irreligion means that you dissagree with the concept of an established religion.

Atheistic Religions
Buddhism
Hinduism
Jainism
Taoism
Humanistic Judaism

All of these have their own religious ceremonies and if there were such a couple in the U.S, they would theoretically be able to marry under the terms of their religion.

Also, consider that Atheists are still heavily scutinized and for Christian Atheists it is sometimes of utmost importance for the their families to see them get marriage in a Christian Church. The fact that most atheists don't mind having religious connections attached to their marriage only shows that most atheists are accepting of being the minority (most because like every other position and religion, there are radicals. And like Libertarians, like conspiracy theorists, atheists tend to use the internet to get their otherwise unheard opinion across) Of course categorizing atheism with conspiracy theorists is obviously unfair but I couldn't think of another example.

Did someone call for a... SUPERHERO!?

Hello lithel boy! I haf come to you ath I haf thpied you from afar! You were in obviouth diththreth, so I dethided to come and athitht you with my thpethial bag of madic! huh? what? Why are you running away lithel boy!? No! I didn't mean it like that! I meant the hocuth pocuth kind of madic, not "my dick"! Gothya! Now hold thtill!

THE DAY IS SAVED ONCE AGAIN by...

EKUBLAI!!!!!

"Atheists are also the minority group most Americans are least willing to allow their children to marry."

AH! I see a thumping good sequel to "Guess Who's Coming to Dinner" on the horizon.

I jack it to Bitey of Brackenwood!

daily award so I can post on the front page again!

Where's HADJI!?

I have five nes games (I've never had more or less actually)
Donkey Kong Country
Donkey Kong Country 2: Diddy's Kong Quest
NBA Live '96
Mortal Kombat II

And my prized possession...

Super Mario All-Stars + Super Mario World 8 games in one cartridge.