....Do you like movies about gladiators?

Please, somebody get it. It should be easy.

At 10/2/08 10:25 PM, the1stguy1 wrote: SNU-SNU

Dammit. I was beaten to the punch.

"I never thought it would end like this, but I always kind of hoped that it would."

Urinate. A lot. It's not my favorite thing to do, I guess, but it's certainly what I do most often. At least I (almost) always have the courtesy to find a toilet first. Even Drunk Dr-Worm has manners.

Guys, let's just face the facts. We all know that DNF is going to turn out to be an outdated, generic FPS that's maybe slightly humorous in the ironic, nostalgic sense. Duke Nukem is a relic of the '90s. I don't think he fits anymore in the modern pop cultural climate, let alone the gaming one.

I hope 3-D Realms proves me wrong. But I doubt they will.

At 10/4/08 10:22 AM, mopo wrote: a hell lot of guys in university tease and bully me cuz im russian its obviouse they are anti russian some of the teachers even bully me what should i do????

Have them sent to the Gulag, comrade! For the glory of the MOTHERLAND!!!

I'm roughly 75% of Russian ancestry...

Erm...I did extensive tutoring starting a couple months in advance. And I did very well. With the theme song from "Diff'rent Strokes" irritatingly stuck in my head for the entire second half of the test. So there's your answer. Whatever, worst case scenario, you'll be able to take the test again (if you're a junior, which I'm assuming you are).

At 10/3/08 05:01 PM, Jackie-Knife-Juggler wrote: i used to "like" dragonforce until i learned that they sped up their own recordings.

I can think of plenty of good reasons not to like Dragonforce, but yours isn't one of them. Are you saying that a band's quality can be determined by how fast they play their instruments? Eh...no.

At 10/3/08 05:26 PM, yurgenburgen wrote: Amy Winehouse.

Since when did getting off your head on crack cocaine and singing like a retarded black six-year-old count as talent? Never. Yet idiots adore this horse-faced cunt and worship the ground she walks on. WINEHOUSE IS SHIT.

Ah yes, because as we all know, a singer's talent is determined by what they look like and their personal life. Also, what you call "singing like a retarded black six-year-old," people with taste call "soul."

Lupe Fiasco.

If you'd give a quick listen to any of his other songs or learn anything about him, you'd realize that that song is clearly meant to be satirical.

Oh well, at least you've all been right about the Jonas Brothers gargling serious taint...

Bwahahaha! Now you'll never find the antidote!

From what I remember, it's pretty long if you want the best ending. Anyways, it would appear that you're considering playing it, in which case I don't recommend that you do. I demand it. It is, hands down, the best RPG of the SNES era, arguably of all time (I like to argue "yes").

The characters are some of the most vibrant, unique, and well-rounded in gaming history (particularly Frog, in my opinion), the story manages to do new and exciting things with a cliched central conflict, the dialogue, plot twists, etc. range from typical J-RPG stilted to surprisingly enjoyable and poignant, the graphics are fantastic, the music is phenomenal, and the gameplay (the most important factor to many people, though not really to me when it comes to RPG's) sticks to RPG basics while utilizing a faster pace that I'm surprised hasn't caught on much until very recently in the genre's history.

In short...uh...yeah, Chrono Trigger is awesome.

Hmm...it's a tough choice:

The original is the most well-rounded, featuring a good balance between stealth gameplay, boss fights, shooting segments, story, and characters, but it's really starting to show its age.

Sons of Liberty is highly underrated in my opinion, but it's also starting to creak a little, the plot gets too tangled up in itself quite often (it's like there's no editors on these scripts), and then of course there's Raiden, who's a (slightly) better protagonist than he's given credit for, but still not even a quarter as godly as Snake.

Snake Eater has the cool James Bond vibe going for it, solid (no pun intended) gameplay, and the only story in the entire series that shows some degree of restraint. Plus, it's one of the only action games, period, that takes serious responsibility for its violence, manifested here in that chilling sequence with The Sorrow. Still, I found the constant menu surfing to be tedious and stupid, the boss characters/encounters (The End, Volgin, and The Boss excluded) are kind of meh for a series known for excellence in that category, and the lack of modern technology can occasionally prove bothersome.

And then there's Guns of the Patriots, which I'm still in the middle of playing. It's very, very, very high quality stuff all around, but the problem is that it's less of a game, more of a movie that sometimes lets you control it. Also, the story, which is sorely in need of heavy editing, ranges from breathtakingly brilliant to face-palmingly mediocre (Kojima is one hell of an auteur, but he has zero restraint and far too often, he can't write dialogue for shit); the leaping of logic and the jumping of sharks abound all over the place.

In the end, I guess that to pick a favorite, I'll have to strictly separate gameplay and story, since the series itself pretty much does that anyway. For story, I'll go with Guns of the Patriots, for gameplay, Snake Eater.

L.A. Noire. What ever happened to that game? Rockstar said something about it once and then it disappeared off the face of the earth. Also, sequels to Bully and Red Dead Revolver would be nice, or a new GTA that IV-ifies Las Venturas.

Catullus. In English, though, I guess Theodore Roethke. Poe's great, too, and Whitman and Dickinson have their moments, as do the likes of Horace, Martial, and Vergil. If you haven't guessed by now, I know how to Latin.

But seriously, what's with all you people and Poe? I mean, he's good and all, but...c'mon, let's not be so emo.

The sitar, the pipe organ, and the bagpipe all have weird, unique sounds that are awesome, plus they look cool. However, there's always the old standby: guitar. I'm just starting to look into taking it up, but it really is a great, versatile instrument.

But overall, I'm going to have to go with the human voice (if that counts). Endless variety in every genre.

At 9/29/08 06:01 PM, LilJon6071 wrote: He is just so weird

One might almost say "queer."

Apparently, the gameplay is a bit bleeeh at times on both systems, so I'd say that since the whole point of the game is that it's an official entry in the Star Wars canon, go with the more cinematic 360 version.

I've gotta get around to buying this game at some point. Or, fuck, I can't be bothered with that, I'll just read all the major plot points on Wikipedia or something.

It's been a while. I thought I'd check up on this 'ole thread. How's it going? Have we learned how to grammar yet? Have we decided that latching onto fad sexual fetishes probably isn't productive use of your time?

At 9/29/08 06:18 PM, evilfluffmonger wrote: Non-Biased? Almost the entire review you were practically marking off things the Wii has that the Xbox 360 and PS3 doesn't.

Erm...isn't that kind of the point of reviewing something? Saying what makes it different from its competitors and whether or not those differences are effective enough to warrant spending money on the thing?

At 9/29/08 06:29 PM, qman1 wrote: I fixed the spelling and grammar errors so you look like you've completed the 6th grade.

A noble effort, but you missed one. It should read "The 360 and the PS3 kick..." "360 + PS3 kicks" is half grammatical mistake, half not at all a sentence.

At 9/29/08 05:00 PM, Wurmy1029 wrote: In all seriousness, what is it with console people (typically 360 users) and their lack of open-mindedness?

Explicit hypocrisy can be fun, kids, but it can also make you look kinda stupid. To paraphrase your overarching point: "Why are those damn 360 users, the vast majority of whom are exactly alike by the way, and I base this on nothing but my preconceived notions about them, so ignorant and close-minded?"

Mmmhmm. Well, guess what, kiddo? It's all a matter of perspective. Back when I only owned a 360, I found (usually on this forum) that it was the Sony fanboys who were bigger jackasses, refusing to consider even for a second that any other console could be viable or that any FPS could be playable ('cept for Resistance, of course, because that game is so totally unique and original). Now I just don't give a shit because I own all three consoles, but my point still stands.

When talking solely about casual players in general (and that's pretty much what you're doing), it's not that they only like FPS's. It's not like they wouldn't enjoy a good platformer or action game or even an accessible RPG or two. It's that when it comes to the big, mainstream tentpole releases, shooters are all they're being given. That's Microsoft and the third parties' faults for stereotyping the male 12-24, 360-owning demographic (like you're doing), not the fault of the players themselves. And as for the more hardcore like me, we generally don't just placidly accept whatever is marched in front of our eyes during the holiday season. We, too, want varied game experiences, and we look deeper (lesser-known and lesser advertised releases, the XBLA) and wider (other consoles, PC, classic consoles, etc.) to get them.

So don't go generalizing about the entire user-base of a console. Especially if you plan on then turning around and calling them "close-minded." Why don't you try practicing what you preach?

I think we could all see this coming the second "BioWare" and "Sonic" were uttered in the same breath. But hey, I'm all for solid companies like BioWare occasionally making quick cash grabs if it means they'll have more funding to work with on future projects they actually care about.

We all had bad grammar when we first started posting, so the question, I guess, is why. I think that it's because if you're 13 years old (though more realistically, let's say it's 10-12), it's likely that your only prior text conversational experience is with AOL/AIM and text messaging, where good grammar isn't really encouraged.

The only thing that baffles me, though, is that these kids can clearly see that all the other users are using proper grammar, so why do they all take so long to catch on?

At 9/28/08 04:54 AM, BioEthanol wrote: 360 + PS3 kicks the Wii's ass.

You "kicks" common sense, basic entertainment consumer intelligence, and grammatical convention's asses.

They has got better Graphics

Ah yes, the true mark of a great game. It certainly explains why Crysis is hailed as the greatest game of all time while pieces of shit like Super Mario Bros. are forever doomed to the bargain bin.

Strike 1.

They has got more mature games such as shooters which the wii lacks they do have RE4 dough.

Because nothing says mature like impossibly gory, glorified violence without consequences and your musclebound cardboard cutout character shouting "shit yeah!" while he slices his opponent in half with a chainsaw. The vast majority of shooters are not at all mature. In fact, they're more juvenile than most family-oriented, E rated games. That being said, the 360 and PS3 do have more actually mature games, but that's only because they have more triple-A third party support in general. And you are clearly unable to see the difference between mature and "Mature," so I'm going to have to assume that you're quite the young 'un yourself, in which case: quiet, the grown ups are talking.

Strike 2.

Their onloie gaming is decent SSBB onlineon wii is really limited.

So you're basing a console's entire online gaming system on one game? That's pretty stupid. What about all of the various online channels on the Wii? What about the Virtual Console? That being said, when it comes to actually playing games online, the 360 and PS3 do have more comprehensive systems. The lack of voice chat or decent connection speeds on most Wii titles, plus the ridiculous Friend Code system, are the biggest glaring flaws with the Wii that I can find. Still, your knowledge is limited, and you're talking out of your ass.

Strike 2.5.

Hrrrm. You just barely managed not to blow the top off the Flame-O-Meter. Whatever, I can't be bothered to extensively argue with such punitive, close-minded morons anyway...yet.

Seven.

Seinfeld FTW!

Also, one of my friends wants to name his kids Rasputin and Potassium.

Also also, Commander Flex Plexico.

If that's a conservative player, than I'm the Jerry Falwell of gameplay style. I save practically every five minutes, always stock up on tons of items, and refuse to risk wasting even the slightest bit of HP or MP or money or whatever. I've also found that, completely unconsciously, I only keep basic items like health potions in multiples of five. In RPG's, I backtrack ridiculously to go to an inn or restock on items and I constantly head straight into dead ends because I don't want to leave any stone unturned in case I miss a treasure chest or something.

In no particular order:

Reel Big Fish- "Beer"
Arctic Monkeys- "Flourescant Adolescent" or "Brianstorm"
Kings of Leon- "Molly's Chambers"
Cold War Kids- "Hang Me Up to Dry"
Strong Bad- "Trogdor"
Yeah Yeah Yeahs- "Y Control" or "Cheated Hearts"
The New Pornographers- "From Blown Speakers" or "Twin Cinema"
Vampire Weekend- "A-Punk"
Modest Mouse- "Heart Cooks Brain" or "The View" or "We've Got Everything"
Flight of the Conchords- "Business Time"

...and of course, everything by the Beatles and Led Zeppelin, among many others. Maybe that's more than 10. Whatever.

At 9/24/08 11:38 PM, D3NTATUS wrote: South. As in, (holy shit this is explicit) "after I vacation in your mouth/ i'll take a summer trip down south."

Ooh, that could work. Thanks a bunch. And the particular verse I needed the rhyme for is probably even more explicit than that. As in, overt references to oral sex and seminal fluid (and Metal Gear Solid...) explicit.

At 9/24/08 09:10 PM, McJesus wrote: Where It's At by Beck.

Once I get those two turntables and a microphone I've been saving up for, maybe this can become my theme song...

A lesser known artist that I've found to actually be a great lyricist is Chris Knox. You probably know him best for his least lyrically focused song (as in: completely lacking in any lyrical focus) "It's Love," y'know, the one from the Heineken commercial. Seriously, though, check out songs like "What Do We Do With Love?," "Man in the Crowd," and "Ghost" (which I'm roughly 80% sure is about abortion).

And I've actually recently started foraying into songwriting myself, so maybe I'll post some lyrics here when they get done. Which reminds me, one thing I have planned is an ironic, ridiculously over-the-top stereotypical rap song, and I need a good word that rhymes with "mouth." Use your imaginations :)

"The Car Song" by the Cat Empire, if we're being real here. But if I were to do what the rest of you are doing and just pick something that would sound badass as I walked down a corridor in slow motion, then "Sabotage" by Beastie Boys, "Knights of Cydonia" by Muse, or if I'm somehow a maniacal supervillain, "The Beginning Is the End Is the Beginning" by Smashing Pumpkins.

Oh, fuck it. I pick "Theme From Shaft" by Isaac Hayes.

At 9/24/08 09:35 AM, ngman7 wrote: The Honeymooners

I find it hard to believe that nobody's done this one already.

Anyways: Schindler's List. That's pretty much all I can think of, since Rule 34 doesn't say that porn of it has to already exist. It says that even if it doesn't, it will at some indeterminate point in the future.

George Orwell's "1984" is the perfect book to read for school at your own choosing. Not only is it an incredible read, but there's an almost unlimited number of things you could write about it. Just don't be boring and focus solely on the "dangers of totalitarianism" like everyone else. Talk about the philosophical and metaphysical nature of truth and beauty and existence instead. If you look at the book at a deeper level than "lulz fashism iz baad," you'll find some excellent, thought-provoking mindfuckery.

My other suggestion would be "Watchmen," but since it's a graphic novel, I don't know whether or not it amounts to 200 pages. I don't think that it does, but you should read it anyway at some point. Great stuff.