Edits to post #25260304 by Seasons
Edited at 2014-10-10 19:22:31
Hello.
I'm going to write a poem. The next user to post should review it, and then write their own poem. Then the next user will review that user's poem, and write their own. Then, well, you get the idea...
William Wordsworth once said, "Poetry is the spontaneous overflow of powerful feelings." I agree with this sentiment, and will therefore not be imposing any sort of recommended word limit or minimum. For the reviews, however, I think it's fair to ask that they be relatively thoughtful, and should therefore go beyond a couple of basic sentences. "Reviews" can range from general responses to outright criticism, as long as its constructive. If you're seeking feedback on a certain aspect on your writing, feel free to leave some questions at the end of your poem for the next user to consider while they critique it. Hopefully this thread will gain some momentum, and we can all have a nice little place to share some poetry with one another.
Here we go!
Untitled, Bipolar, and Drunk
Soft clouds hovering above a volcano,
Sometimes dormant, still
Sometimes active, violent.
Always crying upward,
Shooting fire into the sky,
Causing red to mix with blue
It's an envelope of emotions,
Constantly at war, yet always peaceful.
Rambling, yelling, crying.
Rinse and repeat until
An apology arises,
Until the volcano calms itself,
And the clouds float on
Just for a moment, unimpeded
By billowing smoke.
Fiery violence, freeing vitriolic
Lifestyles and messiness --
Picture "Fuck you!"
Written in quotes:
Everything, everyone
Expressively literal
Nonsensically insightful.
That's all it is.
I don't know what you're saying,
Or what I'm saying,
But it's clear we're talking about something.
Hello.
I'm going to write a poem. The next user to post should review it, and then write their own poem. Then the next user will review that user's poem, and write their own. Then, well, you get the idea...
William Wordsworth once said, "Poetry is the spontaneous overflow of powerful feelings." I agree with this sentiment, and will therefore not be imposing any sort of recommended word limit or minimum. For the reviews, however, I think it's fair to ask that they be relatively thoughtful, and should therefore go beyond a couple of basic sentences. "Reviews" can range from general responses to outright criticism, as long as its constructive. If you're seeking feedback on a certain aspect on your writing, feel free to leave some questions at the end of your poem for the next user to consider while they critique it. Hopefully this thread will gain some momentum, and we can all have a nice little place to share some poetry with one another.
Here we go!
Untitled, Bipolar, and Drunk
Soft clouds hovering above a volcano,
Sometimes dormant, still
Sometimes active, violent.
Always crying upward,
Shooting fire into the sky,
Causing red to mix with blue
It's an envelope of emotions,
Constantly at war, yet always peaceful.
Rambling, yelling, crying.
Rinse and repeat until
An apology arises,
Until the volcano calms itself,
And the clouds float on
Just for a moment, unimpeded
By billowing smoke.
Fiery violence, freeing vitriolic
Lifestyles and messiness --
Picture "Fuck you!"
Written in quotes:
Everything, everyone
Expressively literal
Nonsensically insightful.
That's all it is.
I don't know what you're saying,
Or what I'm saying,
But it's clear we're talking about something.
