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Credits & Info

Uploaded
Jan 17, 2017 | 1:36 PM EST
File Info
Song
7.9 MB
3 min 27 sec
Score
4.78 / 5.00

Licensing Terms

Please contact me if you would like to use this in a project. We can discuss the details.

Score:
Rated 4.78 / 5 stars
Plays & Downloads:
602 Plays | 19 Downloads
Share Links:
Genres:
Hip Hop, Rap, R&B - Hip Hop - Modern
Tags:
new
sad
depressed
feelgoodsongoftheyear

Author Comments

Beat by Axtekk. By the way where the hell are you Ax I miss youuuuuu...

-----Lyrics-----

Rise out of my bed, pissed at how//
All this turned out, as I begin to diss myself//
How many ways can I explain I exist in hell//
I'm suffocating face down in the wishing well//

My downs and ups, I'm wishing they were flipped around//
Look up to you, and all you do is kick me down//
And now it's- rise out the death bed, wish me well//
And witness my offensive against myself//

I'm missing out on all the things I wished about//
Confused at what it was I did when I wished them out//
So wish me well, or whatever fuck it fish me out//
The Chesapeake Bay baby, with a fishy mouth//

If this is how it is, you can dim the blinds//
And count me out, goodnight, you can hit the lights//
Goodbye- for now... I mean- for at least a while//
Okay, I'm back... Hooray- you ain't even smiled//

----- ----- -----
It isn't easy to forgive and forget//
You never forget, and all we do is live in regret//
Admit and repent, and confess, and when I did it I wept//
'Cause it's what's out of my control that has me feeling depressed//

And I guess...

It isn't easy to forgive and forget//
You never forget, and all we do is live in regret//
We need to make a better UV ray//
Because the Sun ain't quite a bright enough light in these dark days//

----- ----- -----

I try to- kiss the clouds, and I kiss the ground//
And you don't pick me up and you don't lift me out//
And now I can't go to bed and there's nothing on//
'Cause I threw the television set through the fucking wall//

And I'm a...

Insomniac when you go to sleep I'mma stay awake//
And slip away like the undertow but I'm over waves//
...I ain't under you but you over me//
And the weight I hold is immeasurable and crushing me//

...Walls are closing in and I'm underneath//
Of a swinging lowering pendulum and it's cutting me//
...And I'm letting it 'cause it's fun to me//
I'm invincible and I really don't even wanna be//

A hundred lifetimes trying not to die//
And not to pry- but I need some replacement eyes//
'Cause my 2 blues are damaged too far beyond repair//
And I developed an incurable thousand yard stare//

----- ----- -----

HOOK

----- ----- -----

Since the day I became the goblin and gobbled amphetamine/
I been solving all of my problems with horrible remedies//
It was- hood to the burbs to a hooligan in the hood again//
From- pen to the pad to my own pad, and into the pen//

I got no motive in keeping up with the Joneses//
My only current concern at the moment's not to be homeless//
Emotionless- Put in work every minute and you don't notice it//
You only searching for negative and you focus it//

And me?

I got a problem with causing my own problems//
And I don't know how I cause 'em and I don't know how to solve 'em//
...And that increase in my lack of energy nowadays?//
...Well it's scaring the shit right outta me//

So ride along while I spit this song//
About how my time ain't gone, but I know this life ain't long //
But so far, the one thing you can learn from me//
Is only one damn thing in the world for free//

-And that's pain.

Reviews


NeoAlchemist247NeoAlchemist247

Rated 5 / 5 stars

Damn.

I assure you this isn't me being a lazy reviewer. This is me in awe. The content was SOOOOO perfect for how I've felt for years. And the way the flow fits into the beat is like a shuttle docking with the ISS. SO satisfying. Great work, old friend.

[DJDj]


People find this review helpful!
Teqneek responds:

Thanks, you just made my day brutha


KleptoidKatKleptoidKat

Rated 5 / 5 stars

good thing.

Q ~~


Teqneek responds:

This is what I crave on my most personal of works. The coveted 2-Word review! Anyway glad you liked it Q, your other reviews cover this... hiccup... if you will...


AxTekkAxTekk

Rated 5 / 5 stars

Aiteeeee there's a lot of things I love. Basically all I want on top is some extra mastering and mixing and shit basically because the sonics sound kinda blocky with the compression of the vox on top of the beat which is limited all in a block. But money and shit, and mics and shit. Also having a hook would make this more catchy and relistenable because easy digestible structure, but the beat really doesn't allow for that, so that one's on me.

Shit I love:

- Intro cueing in the first line building anticipation
- A million and one different flows weaved inbetween lyrics that fuck with the blocky 4/4 beat
- Alternating vocal tone with the chorus and the verse keeping it fresh but related
- Melodic tone keeping it interesting in the verse
- Those "swoosh" sounds in the 2nd 16
- Consistently relatable depressive truth bombs

Fuck you for making me wanna kill myself. But that's also a sign that this song's fucking dope? So basically I like I guess even though it hurts me so :'(


People find this review helpful!
Teqneek responds:

First of all lol there IS a hook my bruhbruh.

I'm not the best at mastering my shit. Really. And I spend HOURS on it lol. But I spend months writing a song sometimes. Sometimes years for real. I need to dedicate a little of that time into learning to properly master I guess. Although for real I kinda thought I did learn enough to not sound amateurish, at least in my ears. Some of the things people ding me on are actually intentional, haha so idk. I put time into mastering, yet all I seem to ever hear about is how this and that needs to be fixed.

I do appreciate the input btw, but after a while I guess it kinda gets me down because idk what else to really do and I don't really WANT to learn it to be honest. I respect the shit out of it though- trust me. I'm just not neurally built for audio engineering. I'm a writer. And a lover of women. And protector of the land.

Lol also I'm copypasting what I said in response to your comment on my other recent depressing track The Depp End. (*haha not even correcting that spelling error for it opens up a whole world of ideas).

"...glad I could somewhat do your beat justice. Although, for me (and I know it may not be the majority, but others feel me on this too), sad music has a reverse effect. It somehow makes me happier. When I'm at my lowest I usually go for September Sun (by Type O Negative), or The Boy Who Blocked His Own Shot (by Brand New).

Anyway, I hope certain people can listen to this song and feel "better" knowing there are others going through something similar to what they are. Thanks again homie, yer my guy..."


EDM364EDM364

Rated 4.5 / 5 stars

Literally the only issue with this track is the compression and distortion as a result of said compression -- the volume leveling basically. Watching the spectrometer, there's a lot of red lining, which tells me either everything is just turned up way too loud to get a clean output. This takes away from the darkness and sonaural strengths of the instrumental and -- have you ever had a battery powered speaker start dying on you? This is the equivalent effect, except Reaper literally can't render the audio any louder than it is, so when it tries, it ends up distorting the shit out of it and losing its gravitas. Some people intentionally ramp up the output and compression to all or part of a song because they think it's hilarious making ears cry in more extreme examples. This I assume you really don't want, since without it, you've got some filet mignon on the plate.

TLDR: Watch your output levels. Your peaks should never consistently ride 0 dBFS. Otherwise what you hear on your rig and in the mixer might sound great, but what comes out is going to sound -- well, just worse than it would if you rendered everything at a more reasonable volume and then went and amplified it in Audacity (being sure not to allow clipping, or you'll have the same problem).

Around 2:47, your sync between recordings is a little off, just enough to jar me but not enough to draw my attention from the verse, which I will say is impeccably written and meaningful, as always. So no comment here other than a thumbs up.

On vocals, do have a look at noise cancellation like I mentioned. This will bring your vocals up a notch and help with mixing them properly. You could also do with some more clarity in the 12-18 khz range, and if you've been doing the sock on mic trick like I did for years, might swap to a sock stretched over a wire coat hanger. I mean, because hell, it works just as well as the 20 dollar clip ons if you have some clothespins.

Keep killing shit. Mad respect -- you've always got something interesting to bring to the table.


People find this review helpful!
Teqneek responds:

Hahaha oh man I just died but it's cool. Just funny is all...

OKAY- Let's do a quick science experiment; we shall follow these simple steps...

1. Take the first 8 words of your review.

2. Gently cover up all the other words in the review.

3. Read the 8 words ("Literally the ONLY issue with this track is"...)

4. Remove hand to reveal entire review.

5. Laugh at yo silly self.

Hahaha I can honestly see myself doing exactly what you just did so don't take what I just said as an insult btw.

It was just kinda hilarious to me. I read that and was like "Oh cool... And this is a long review too so I'm about to see some praise in them 3 paragraphs down there. Yonder".

Anyway I ain't jabbing on ya, well maybe but only kiddingly if that's a word.

4Realtho- Thank you for your review and pointers. I REALLY just need those hip hop Keebler Elves to whisk my recorded vox away and hand me back a professional-sounding vocal file with some chewy chocolate chip cookies. Why can't this be reality? Anyway... fuck this is becoming a long-winded reply; lemme get to it...

Yadda yadda my mastering needs work. We've talked equipment so you know that situation. As for the other advice you left, I appreciate it and will heed those tidbits of knowledge. As for the sound...

If you're talking about that feeback-y noise audible mostly in the beginning... it came with the beat Ax sent me. But for real I gotta re-read your comment to fully get a grasp on your pointers, but thanks! Btw, a comment worth a second read is a GOOD comment. Unless... the reason said person is re-reading is because of illiteracy- whether his own or that of the commenter. But I digress...


MickeyMaoMickeyMao

Rated 5 / 5 stars

Axtekk's beat so good!!!

Really good song here. Even with the quite dynamic and awesomeness of this beat, the mixing of the vocals was very audible and on point throughout. Lyrics are solid and have a very heart broken poets vibe to them. The transition from the verse to hook was executed very well on each verse. Definitely one of the best deliveries I've heard from ya; your voice really hits the right emphasis to make the lyrics really sink in. Ironically enough, I think a "depressing" song like this, may just help someone who's feeling down; so a feel good song it very might well be!

Props and keep up bro


People find this review helpful!
Teqneek responds:

Wow Mickey, regarding your closing comment there... I just got done about 2 hours ago explaining to my mom almost word for word what you just said. Haha that's crazy. Anyway thanks for the input man, you my most improved friend 2016