Dissonance... and motion related thereof... an amazing thing to use, and most people are too scared to try out some good dissonance.
I think you could have tried to work on reducing the repetitiveness a bit and presenting new themes and more dramatic changes, especially with such a small ensemble where such changes are near required. Certain instruments seem to perform the same role throughout, and although that's perfectly fine, sometimes switching things around can show you something you never thought of before.
I enjoyed this piece considerably. I only wish it were for a larger ensemble, but it's perfectly fine with the instrumentation it presently has. There isn't much motion, throughout the piece... it essentially just wanders. If that's the feel you want (it sounds like it is by your description), that's fine, but a lot of people like orchestral pieces that take them on a journey.
A very fine piece nonetheless, best of luck!
-Samulis