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This is an impression I did of my good friend "Dickbuns". SymbolCymbal said I should put in on here.
Sorry, but I can make more than a short list about what is wrong with this piece. Starting again might be a better option, but with only 3 seconds on the clock, you'll not have lost a whole lot.
1) Mic quality - the sound is either down to the fact that you've turned the mic sensitivity up too high, you're standing too close to it or you're just plain speaking too loudly into it. You want to make the sound not too over the top, without "topping out" on the equaliser, thus causing overload feedback.
2) The first second of the track is made up of you opening your mouth, which while it sounds funny, it also sounds a little disgusting. Bill Bailey made a whole sketch based around Carol Vorderman doing something similar, but I wouldn't advise you to try the same. Chop that out and get more material.
3) The "script" is weak. At least with my short entry, Dr. Claw, there is a good idea of who on earth I'm imitating. Yours has a little too fine a target audience, to pull this off - was this done for a thread in General, or a Stickam chat room? Try fleshing the piece out, so that you can present the wider audience with a better devised piece, as opposed to four words, comprising the piece as a whole.
4) The ending - there isn't one. You barely pronounce the "d" of intoxicated and you're back to square 1 and that inexplicable sound. At least allow it to run a little further, then pause and remove the mouse click sounds from the background. This will increase the overall length of your piece by at least 8.3% (a quarter of a second).
There is plenty to do, so would starting from scratch really kill you? Probably not, but who am I to judge?
[Review Request Club]
I really don't have much I can say here.
-It's a voice, and I can only imagine that it's a good impression, since I don't know the person, er... 'Dickbuns'.
-There's some distortion in the voice. I can't be sure what causes this, but I'd check your recording software, microphone, and your surroundings to make sure that there's nothing that would cause it. You may also want to keep your mouth from being right next to the microphone (if you are doing that), as this can cause some distortion and level issues.
I apologize, I really don't know what else to say.
-Review Request Club-
I'm a lil' bit intoxicated.
Uh oh, if I was reviewing this outside of the RRC.
If I was reviewing this outside of the RRC I would be giving it a 10/10. Oh well, it has to get a completely honest review from me. I hope we're still friends after this is over. :(
The sound/voice that happens right in the beginning shouldn't be there at all. It almost adds a beat when this loops over and over, but nah, just shouldn't be there man. You also talk just a little too close to the microphone. You can tell because on your higher sounds you can hear static around it. Back up a little bit, stay nice and loud, clear, and then speak. Don't put the mic in your mouth man! :P
To be completely honest it does make me smile a little bit, but wouldn't this be much more fun with some background music, a few extra words here and there, and a nice beat? It could actually be a pretty awesome loop if you think about it. Maybe I'll make it into a song some day. Probably not though so it'll have to stay the way it is.
Wait, what am I saying? I had too much to drink and I simply have no clue what I'm listening to.
~ Review Request Club ~
What's so Goddamn funny, punk?
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