Bass Nectar, anyone?

Not a bad start (you're looking for feedback, so I'm reviewing it as a work in progress). First, kill your lead instrument! The melody is right, the instrument is not. The deep bass beat you have going is done with HQ samples, but the lead makes it sound like an 8-bit piece. Second, keep that beat! It's awesome! Third, if I were you, I'd pull some speech samples...maybe political rallies or movie clips. This has that kind of epic, tense feel...Last, build a bridge. I know you're just starting on this, you've got a good verse. Needs chorus and bridge.

Hope that's helpful!

-Ceevro