Announcer: Welcome to the First Annual Ye Olde Pirate Poetry contest. Here's our first entry.

Entry 1

There was a Pirate who loved to garden
His fellow mateys did not approve
They called him mean names
So he killed them all in their sleep

*Cheers from crowd, 'We approve!'*

Announcer: Ah, tis good for the soul. Now for our second entry!

Entry 2

Um, well, I'm not a Poetry Pirate, I'm a Comedy Pirate, so instead, I'll tell a joke.
What is the favorite fast food establishment frequented by pirates? Give up?
AARRRRRRRRRBY'S! Get it? Arrrrby's?

*Boos from crowd, 'You gotta be kiddin me!'*

Announcer: Man, that stunk. Now, for our last entry.

Entry 3

Roses are red
Violets are blue
Plundered villages burn to the ground
And wenches who don't put out do, too!

*Whoops from the crowd*

Announcer: We have a winner! Now let's go pillage!