no, sorry!

-The monotone Drummkit plays solo for half of the song, befor this unharmonic synth enters-
-You should use the same bpm for all elements you are using-
-It's very boring because of the repeating-

But i think you could get better-
A Tip: Do not submit every new song you made at once-
Let your sister/brother/parents/best friends review to your song before submittin!