Aren't the proportions a little... huge and small here and there... for a "Regular girl" ?! ;)
Anyways, good work, I guess it's very difficult to draw a face when you don't want to make it too traditional or too much anime-looking. Even if you're not satisfied with it, give your own style a chance, I would like to see that.
I was about to rate this 3.5 stars, but since you are so honest about the Free to play thingy, I'll reward that honesty with 4 stars.
BTW, I don't understand why you are not scouted for the art portal yet (I would like to vote on your pics), all I can do is recommend you, mate.