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CJ2 - I Fell For You - Pt. 2

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CJ2 - I Fell For You - Pt. 2

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Credits & Info

Views
4,396
Score
3.14 / 5.00

Date
02/20/2012
Category
Illustration
File Info
550 x 3286 px
JPG
1.1 mb
Tags
comic
rain
paralysis
comicjam2

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You are free to copy, distribute and transmit this work under the following conditions:

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Author Comments

Made for the Newgrounds Comic Jam 2!
The theme for the jam was rain.
This is part 2 of 2, part 1 can be found here:
http://www.newgrounds.com /art/view/spaghetti14/com ic-jam-2-rain-pt-1

Reviews


PIED3PIED3

Rated 3.5 / 5 stars Mar 4, 2012

That dialogue is atrocious! Come on, show don't tell. He really didn't need to say "I've always hated the rain due to my paralysis" when we've just seen him get paralysed in the rain and say "fuck off" to someone who said they liked the rain. Have a bit more faith in the subtleties of your story telling! I think the problem is you chose to large a story for such a short comic, and so the character blurts out unrealistically everything he's thinking so as to reach a conclusion in 1 panel. The story is quite nice, and i like your art style, but you need to think about pacing and dialogue.


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